


When Doves Cry

by JapaneseBuffalo



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Long-Distance Relationship, Love, M/M, Multi, Slow Burn, Teen Angst, Teen Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2020-08-20 06:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 52,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20223574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JapaneseBuffalo/pseuds/JapaneseBuffalo
Summary: There were few things that had instilled fear in me since the summer of 1985. After becoming witness to the monsters from my fantasy Dungons and Dragons game come into reality, to seeing the life drain from the eyes of those against us and to be close to the brink of death, my sense of fear was warped.Even without all the monsters, Russian spies and government agencies, the true horror is coming home to no one.A yearish after the events of ST3; just for fun.





	1. Sign O' The Times

There were few things that had instilled fear in me since the summer of 1985. After becoming witness to the monsters from my fantasy Dungeons and Dragons game come into reality, to seeing the life drain from the eyes of those against us and to be close to the brink of death, my sense of fear was warped.

Even without all the monsters, Russian spies and government agencies, the true horror is coming home to no one.

Despite the previous incidents where I've been out past curfew. Putting my own life in danger, having my parents see me in the back of an ambulance car, or after the shadow monster incident how me and everyone else involved were gone for another two days in quarantine. How I had shown up at home to just my father asleep in the living room, my mother out and about only to come home later and make a fuss about the bags under my eyes, dirt under my nails and cuts and scrapes all over my arms and legs from running in tunnels, disguising the shed, running, endless running. The third occurrence, again being gone for days, only to show up at home with a bruised face, busted lip and an unspoken fear of being alone. That for those three months when I was still able to have El near I was back to being with her constantly because we had both come so close to losing each other.

This time around was different. I and others had thought that El worked up the strength to manipulate her powers full time, that when we were just prepubescent little kids she wasn't strong enough to withstand herself. But her powers were dormant this time around and it hit everyone full force that she's still just a girl, one with the fate of the world always on her shoulders.

With her and Will gone, the party has dispersed. We all started high school and tried our best to suppress the summer and try to get back to normal as quickly as possible. Within the first half of the year I was the one set back. Still waiting and hoping that Miss Byers would return with El and Will. But after their third visit down here, El had broken down, confessing that being in Hawkins was too difficult, brought up too many bad memories and the tragedy of Hopper's death.

Hopper's death is still something my mind has refused to accept. Because a guy as brutish and stubborn as him just doesn't go down that easy. He was untouchable in my mind, and when I had confessed that to El she just broke down all over again.

After the first half of that year and El confessing the pain Hawkins gives her, I had taken to visiting her in Illinois whenever possible. Which had turned out to be at least once every other month, and if I was lucky and worked enough odd jobs, I had spent the occasional three day weekend and holiday over there. We still had the coms as a form of communication, Dustin had sent Will off with the instructions of how to build their own radio tower. And Will had actually figured out how to get it onto a much smaller scale due to Joyce's complaints of how much it had stood out upon their new house. But these days it's rare to hear anything emitting from my com.

It's true what they say about high school. It just expands the cliches and theres a place for everyone to fit into. Lucas had become involved in sports, training with his teammates everyday after school, being away a lot at games, he even made varsity basketball his freshmen year. Max had broken up with Lucas in the middle of freshmen year and they weren't able to patch things up as well this time around, they talk but it's not always civil. Max hung around the skaters, also branded as the stoners, it's mostly guys and the occasional girl who just wants to date a bad boy. Dustin came into high school disappointed with how terrible the A/V department was and restarted the club from scratch, he is the one that has changed the least and I am so greatful for his persistence. We all have joined the A/V club for old times sake, but Lucas is most times too busy to show up and Max just blows it off a lot.

I actually talk to Max the most out of all of them because we have three classes together. She takes a different tone with me because her outside exterior is a bitch that can't be crossed. But due to the shared trauma she puts away her act.

But with me I've become more of a floater this year. Half of my heart belongs in Illinois while the other half stays here to endure the necessary education. Because of my main focus being El, being involved in extra curriculum, hell just being involved with high school in general wasn't a priority to me, so while others set their goals and shot for the stars and branched out, I kept to myself and this alternative life I led on the side.

That was until the next summer had rolled around.

•••

"I think it'd be great for him Ted." My mother submissively piled seconds onto my father's plate as he glowered towards me. "Time away from Hawkins, I'm sure Joyce would be able to help him get a job out there, it'd give him a good experience and teach him about responsibility."

"He's too young." He waved my mother away as she sat his plate down.

"I'm sixteen dad." I had spoken, releasing the hold I had on myself. If I was going to convince him to let me go that would mean that I couldn't lash out like an over emotional brat. "And you told me that when you were my age you went to work on Aunt Jo's farm for a summer." The stories of him and his cousins goofing off on a farm are probably just about the only good memories my dad has.

And with that I could tell he was convinced. "Alright. If you could make the money up to get your own bus ticket then go ahead. And don't go getting mixed up in all that craziness again. I hear one word again about any sort of trouble down there and you'll be sorry." He gestured with his fork and I nodded as nicely as I could muster.

•••

"Here sweetie let me take that." Joyce was here alone to retrieve me from the bus station. It was 4 in the morning and I was wide awake with excitement. "You have a good trip?" She asked after hugging me and I nodded following her off to her car.

"El and Will really wanted to be here when you came but they had something set in stone before you had made plans to come down." She looked at me apologetically and I just smiled.

"No that's fine, I have all summer to be with them." I shrugged and she gave me a tired smile in return before starting the car up.

The small town of Willowbrook was just an hour away from Chicago. The new Byer house was on the end of a culdasac and compared to the old house, this one was huge. It had four bedrooms, a basement, an upstairs and a screened in porch that led to the pool in the backyard.

"This place is nice, it's great you guys have this out here." I said sincerely and her eyes had misted over as she nodded.

"This wouldn't have been possible without Hop." She pressed a closed fist to her mouth as she looked at his photo on the mantle, along with Wills drawing of Bob. The living room was a huge open space with the wooden beams going diagonally toward the fireplace drawing your eye directly towards them. Two fallen heros.

I stood in awe for a moment. Joyce had always been the parental figure in my life when I was unable to go to my parents. She has a better understanding of how to deal with kids than my parents had, and it's the first time that I'm recognizing the hell she's been through.

The older I get and the more the impending doom of the upside down ages me mentally I sympathize with the adults in my life more frequently.

To be standing across from the woman who has went through hell and back for her son's safety and suffered not only one great loss but two. El had explained to me a long time ago that Hopper was her high school sweetheart, and I am just floored with greif for the first time in awhile. Without El being there everyday I didn't have to think about the impact of the situation but being around people who share trauma makes the feelings come rushing back. It was different back at home because they've tried so hard to forget that part of our lives. The one where we had almost died. The one where we had seen people die.

I held my arms out and hugged her and with a sigh she accepted, she heaved a small sob and buried her nose in my shoulder with small sniffles. "You're getting too tall Mike." She croaked. "You boys are getting so big, I can't believe it sometimes that you were so little, dealing with so much." She shook her head pulling back and held my face between her hands.

"El's gonna be so happy to see you again. She was so nervous and Will had to keep telling her to calm down." She laughed wiping my tears with her thumbs.

"Thank you, again for letting me stay for the summer." I uttered out and she shook her head.

"If I had it my way Mike, you'd stay here forever." I wasn't opposed to that. She knew my parents, they'd never come to understand me the way she does. Imagine a world where I just dropped everything and lived out the rest of my life here with Joyce, Will and El.

"I'm gonna get some sleep." I said quietly and she nodded her head quickly.

"Yes, of course. Yours is Will's old room the one across from the bathroom on this main floor. He convinced me to let him move downstairs to Johnathans old room." She sat down on the edge of the couch, still looking towards the images on her mantle.

•••

The next day I had woken up just a little before noon, the room I was in had sliding glass doors that led to a little patio garden and I ventured out to wake myself up a little more. It was just a small little circular patio that surrounded a fountain that didn't even work. The shrubbery was dying and the only thing that seemed well taken care of back here was a garden bed of sunflowers that was right next to another sliding glass door. I glanced in to see pale yellow walls, a white nightstand, white bed frame with a pale pink bedspread, a white vanity and shoved into the edge of the mirror of that vanity was a prepubescent Polaroid of myself on Halloween. Other than that small detail the other signs of occupancy was the clutter of makeup on the desk, the pile of books on the floor and the Mickey Mouse phone on the nightstand.

El's room. I sighed walking back into my own. Her and Will should be back later on today. They had went to visit El's aunt for her birthday yesterday. I've never gotten anxiety about seeing her before but it's been months since I've been able to, and each time I've visited in the past it hits me just as hard as it did the first time, of how much I loved her and the pain I've suppressed from being away.

I get to spend two and a half months with her and I already dread letting her go again.

•••

I was sitting in my room reading a paperback copy of White Noise by the time I heard El, Will and Joyce come back. I closed the book trying to decide if I should rush out and greet them or wait for them to come to me but just as I opened the door I was greeted with the sight of El, her hand raised intending to knock. Her shocked expression turned into a huge grin as she made no hesitation to practically jump and wrap her arms around my neck with a shriek.

"I missed you!" We're the first words she uttered and I laughed hugging her back, so very thankful that I didn't have to flounder for words.

"Hey, I missed you too." I sighed and she pulled back still grinning as she looked at my lips, quickly kissing me before she stepped back and wrapped her hands around my arm.

"Will's in the living room." She pulled me along through the hallway and I got the chance to admire her. Her hair was set in one braid going down to her shoulder blades, she had on a light green top and white skirt, dressed for the hot summer. Once we got to the living room I stopped at the sight of my best friend who was stood at the kitchen island picking at the fruit his mother had just washed.

His hair was shorter and styled upwards rather than the bowl cut we always twined with. I blinked in astonishment, he wore a pale purple polo shirt tucked into some high end, acid wash, cavaricci pants, ones that few of the wealthier kids at my school donned.

"Mike!" He uttered through as his mouth was stuffed with grapes. He was almost as tall as me, his arms and face were much fuller. Last I heard he was gonna try out for the tennis team, seems like he got in. He walked over and pulled me into a hug clapping me on the back and I laughed pulling back and El let go of me to sit at the kitchen island to also snack on the grapes.

"Dude, you're huge, what do you do? Bench 500s?" I punched his arm for good measure and he winced anyways, pretending to rub soreness away.

"No, it's just everyone that does sports at our school has to do summer conditioning. El doesn't like it very much." He snickered, and I looked over at her in confusion.

"I joined the swim team." She rolled her eyes. "But I didn't compete for this whole season because I was awful."

"Yeah, but to be fair your previous experiences with water weren't very helpful." Will said with a sympathetic smile and El's lips went into a slight frown. She doesn't like to be reminded about her days at the lab.

"So, kids" Joyce clapped her hands together gaining our attention she placed a white envelope on the table, shouldering a handbag. "This is money for pizza tonight, sorry I couldn't stay here with you guys for tonight but my boss offered me the night shift and I just had to take it because they've been cutting so many of my hours lately-"

"Mom it's fine, don't worry." Will placed his hands on her shoulders to stop her ramblings and her face softened as she patted his face.

"Alright, well you guys be good. Don't wait up either, I probably won't get in until 5am anyways." She grumbled, blowing quick kisses towards me and El before rushing out the door.

We all stood in silence listening to her car pull out of the driveway before Will and El started quickly moving about the kitchen.

"You call Jen and Heather, I'll call Nath, Aaron and Tom." El threw a phone notepad towards Will and he nodded bounding off towards the living room.

"Wait, what's going on?" El started packing the fruit away in the fridge and she turned around with a sigh.

"Joyce only works this late at least once a month. So, Will and I like to host small get togethers with some kids from school." My excitement obviously didn't match hers and she rubbed my arm. "I really want you to meet my friends. I want them to see the boy I can't shut up about." She grinned, her smile being contagious. I couldn't help leaning in and stealing a kiss.

"Uh, Jen and Heather are coming, but Jen was with Michelle when I called so she kinda invited herself." Will interrupted and El pulled away with a frown.

"I'm fine with her, as long as she doesn't pull the crud she did last time." El held her hand out for the phone note pad and Will tossed it over.

With El leaving the room I looked towards Will who was pocketing the pizza money, pausing when he saw me. "What'd Michelle do?"

Will rolled his eyes. "She was trying to show off. She brought beers and some other hard liquor." He waved his hand dismissively. "But nothing like that should happen tonight. This is just a hang out, with good music, some pizza, maybe even some games."

"Like D&D?"

Will, being caught off guard knocked the potpourri bowl off the counter. And we both cursed fumbling to pick up the scattered pieces of dried rose petals and whatever the hell else is in potpourri.

"I uh, the guys I hang with," We got all the contents back in the bowl and I placed it back on counter for him. "They don't play D&D." He said quietly. "We play party games, if we're in the mood. Like charades, or seven minutes in heaven. Most times we end up playing red hands just because there's no set up and those dumb jocks just want to show off their strength."

Just as I was about to ask who exactly participated in seven minutes of heaven, El walked into the room tossing the phone book down.

"All set. I'm gonna go get cleaned up." She turned away and started walking towards her room then turned around. "Mike? Aren't you coming?"

"Oh, uh." I glanced at Will to see if it would bother him but he just simply waved to me as he took the back stairs to the basement. And with that I joined Eleven.

***

"I like-" El interrupted me with a kiss. "Your room-" Another kiss. "Very pretty." More kisses. "Very you." She stopped with a laugh.

"Are you gonna talk the entire time I kiss you?" She threw herself back onto her mismatched pillows, placing her feet on my lap. But I had pushed them off and crawled to the top of the bed to rest against the pillows too. Shoulder to shoulder, I reached for her hand and intertwined her fingers with mine.

"I've missed you a lot." I said quietly. "And I meant to visit sooner but you know how my dad is." I grumbled and she wrapped her other arm around the one that was holding her, cuddling into my side. "I feel like I've missed so much within that time." The smiley girl of Willowbrook looked at me apologetically, almost as if I broke past the smile she put up and if I kept on with my own pity party she'd burst into tears. I tucked her hair behind her ear and smiled.

"You've changed. Good changes." I assured her and the sad eyes vanished as I continued to pet her head. "You speak really good-"

"Well." She corrected with a small giggle and I rolled my eyes.

"You speak well." I ruffled her head and she groaned but I went back to petting. "You made more friends, you and Will are close and that's amazing." She busied herself by playing with my shirt while I praised her. "You finished your first year in high school." I sighed. "I'm not sad because you're changing. I'm sad because I can't be there while you do." I admitted.

She sat up still holding my hand, her eyes glanced at the door making me look there too but I saw nothing but the door cracked open.

"I wanted you here too." She said quietly she looked down at our hands. "I wanted everyone here."

"Lucas stopped calling. The last I've heard from him he had just gotten a job at that camping store." So that would've been nearly 10 months ago. "Max called two weeks ago, but her most of her calls were cut short because her friends would stop by and ask to hang out." I myself have hung out with Max a total of eight times outside of school and each time she ran into one of the other skaters and rain-checked me, or when at a party, just not even say a word and ditch me completely. "And Dustin is almost tied with you. He's always calling to tell me about quantum mechanics and he's been working hard to find a way to get my powers back." She frowned. "I don't have the heart to tell him that they're probably never going to come back." Well that's new, he never told me that he was trying to find a way to get her powers back. I wasn't even aware he had contacted her that much.

El got out of bed letting go of my hand to rummage through her clothes, which was the whole purpose of us being in here. I scrambled for something to say. "Maybe we could see if we could possibly round the party up? Just for one weekend?" I asked covering my eyes as she gestured for me to do so.

"Would they even come?" She asked. I could still hear her shuffling with the clothes and I shrugged.

"I know Max would come, any excuse to get out of that town. Her mom would even be more than willing to have her come up here too to get her to stop hanging out with all those boys." I snorted. "Dustin would come because you're what he calls his favorite discovery."

"Cute." She deadpanned. I felt her hand pulling mine away from my eyes and I blinked for a second before feeling my face heat from the blood rushing to my head.

She had put on a pair of denim overall shorts. Underneath the overalls she had on a grey Talking Heads shirt, which she may have gotten from Johnathan. Not noticing my shock she walked over to her vanity to begin doing her makeup.

"No hope for Lucas?" She asked and I shook my head to clear it.

"It'd be hard to get him down here since he has practice for baseball." I watched as she did a dusting of pink around her eyes, blushed her cheeks and lined her lips and tinted them. But she made eye contact with me through the mirror then looked back at herself then went to grab some tissues to wipe the stuff she put on her lips off.

"I want them to come down here only if they really want to. I mean I know Max and Lucas aren't together anymore. I wouldn't want to force them to stay in this house together." She then went to work on her hair, taking it out of it's braid and running her hands through it, with just the right amount of poofy waves she turned back to me in a wordless question.

"You look great." I said immediately. "Should I have gotten changed?" We both looked over my outfit which was a black t shirt from the Sylvan Beach in New York, I hadn't even gone there, my mom must have gotten it at a garage sale. I also had a pair of black jeans that were accidentally ripped at the knees. If most kids at my school didn't know I was a major nerd, most people would probably assume I was a wannabe grunge band member which it's music was slowly creeping it's way into my rural high school, which Max would usually tell me all about. Her and I had a habit of trading cassette tapes back and forth during classes. My collection back home was probably more hers than mine.

Just as El was about to comment on what I was wearing the doorbell rung and she looked back at me with a shrug. "Too late."


	2. Atlas Shrugged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His lips went into a tight line and he gritted his teeth shaking his head slightly. His shoulders dropped for the second time tonight. Again he let out a sigh. A vision of atlas crossed my mind, and with that I remembered just how much Will had dealt back at home, from the the bullying to the abduction and possession. With this new life, this mask, he had successfully hid the trauma of the events of the upside down, the loss of a childhood. He and El held the weight of worlds on their shoulders and no one acknowledges it.

Jen, Heather and Michelle arrived together as Heather's mom sat in the driveway, she obnoxiously honked twice from a horrid AMC Pacer. I've only heard my dad trash talk that car when he was with his coworkers at those lame block parties. But holy shit that thing was ugly.

"I said alright ma!" She shrieked slamming the door. El grimaced but hid it with a smile as she stepped forward to greet them, still holding my hand. They all gave hugs and the girls kept their eyes on me the entire time pretending to listen to El explaining which guys she had invited.

"Is this Mikey?" Heather stepped forward with a smirk and obnoxiously chewing gum.

"Mike, yeah. He's here for the summer." El gave me a look that made me feel fuzzy but it dissipated when Michelle had spoken up.

"So your mom just let's your boyfriend stay for the summer? What the hell? Can you tell me how I get the stick out of my mother's ass?"

Oh, she has to conceal her identity. I said to myself as I was first confused with the talk of El's mother. They probably know her as Jane here too.

"No, it's not like that. I mean Mike and Will have always been best friends. I'm kinda used to having him over." The girls seemed sated with information and they made their way to the living room.

And El turned to me with her eyes wide as she put her hands to her head and pretended to pull it from the roots and she gave out a tiny shriek that only I could hear. And I grabbed her hands from her head trying not to laugh too loud and she hit her forehead to my chest before composing herself.

"I love you, and I hope tonight goes okay." She said, quickly kissing me, catching me off guard, not even giving me the chance to appreciate it before she joined the girls in the living room.

•••

Within the next hour the boys had shown up and Will had reappeared from downstairs when they had. I've come to find out that the guys are better friends with El than Will. And they've taken to calling her a the nickname Plain-Jane, I had tried my best to not be irked. The girls were all poofy haired, bright colored wearing brunettes, and in all honesty my only identifier for them is how much they annoy me. Heather wouldn't stop chewing her gum so loudly, Michelle constantly has her foot in her mouth and I actually don't think she's aware of how offensive she is or how much she oversteps her boundaries with some of the questions she had asked me in the small amount of time that I met her. And Jen, quiet, is actually El's friend who frequented these small kickbacks and from what I'm witnessing she had a small thing for Will.

And the boys I've come to recognize them by varying levels of their love for sports, Nath, Nathan, whatever the hell, fully claims sports as a personality. His first question to me was something about the Chicago bears and I had pretended that I didn't hear him over the girls talking. Tom, played baseball and made sure you knew it by carrying around his baseball cap but didn't actually wear it. He cracked a bunch of jokes but laughed too hard at them himself for anyone to enjoy them. I think he and Heather dated? Then Aaron who really didn't acknowledge my presence, he was too distracted by trying to talk to El any chance he got. It was obvious he liked her, obvious to me at least.

•••

"No! And haven't you heard? Mr. Richardson totally relocated because Silvia's parents threatened the school board." Michelle gave her intell on some kind of inappropriate affair from their school. Which made El uncomfortably retreat to the kitchen where Nathan was raiding the fridge.

And for the first time that night I was left to fend for myself. Michelle saw my vulnerability and pounced. "So, Michael, how long have you and El been a thing?"

Technically since we were 12, but to other people saying that we've been together for almost five years sounds outrageous. My mom is always boasting about it to her friends on the phone.

"Uh, we met when we were 12." Was all I supplied her with.

"It's really sweet that you guys are still together even after she moved here." Heather moved to place her hand on my shoulder and I held back a disgusted look as she slid her hand down my arm.

"So, you guys like do it and stuff?" There goes Michelle, I could hardly understand her with all that foot in her mouth.

"And stuff." I mumbled. If I wasn't so outrageously annoyed by their presence I would've been more embarrassed, maybe even stuttered and blushed.

"Ooh, details please, Jane won't tell us anything-"

"Neither will he." El walked back into the room just then with Nathan trailing behind her holding the bowl of grapes they had been snacking on earlier.

"I'll tell you what me and Heather did since you perverts want a story." Tom kicked his feet up on the table and El sat down by me, kicking Tom's leg back off.

"Even I don't want to hear that." Heather scoffed and reached into her purse pulling out a cigarette. "I'm going outside." She got up and Michelle had followed in suit and to my surprise Will had gotten up too, and wherever Will went Jen followed.

"You wanna go out there too? It's just on the porch." El asked and I shrugged, leaving it up to her. We watched as the rest of the kids made their way to the back screened in porch and she got up pulling me with her.

"I could just eat him up." We had walked in on Heather talking about me of all people. I felt El's hand tighten and I sighed, sitting on the patio seat and pulling her over to sit on my lap. At this point I was just content to just fuss with El's hair and let them all talk. And so that's what I did.

I listened in as Heather continued to bring up their groups old memories, most of them being other parties that were much more wild than this. Her explaining drunken nights spent jumping into pools with your clothes on, someone ashing their cigarette into expensive sofa cushions. Will doing his first leg stand and puking his guts out.

And at that my attention was piqued. Will rolled his eyes I took notice at the cigarette in his hand as he leaned on one of the wooden beams to the porch. He and Jen were bumming off of the same one and before he could catch me staring I nuzzled my nose into El's hair to stifle the smell of smoke.

I always thought Lucas was the one who had changed the most, but him participating in sports was just expected, he was the strongest and well coordinated he and his dad watched games together and they took me to a major league game when I was 8. But Will on the other hand, it's not even him at this point.

I don't mind that he smokes, or drinks, I've tried a hand full of times (All from Max's influence) and I know it won't be my last. It's just I've seen no remnants of the boy I grew up with. I mean he had freaked out when I mentioned D&D earlier.

"Hey Will, do you still draw?" I had interrupted whatever Heather had thought was an interesting story and Will raised his brow at me in confusion.

"Not really, I mean I guess I sketch sometimes but it's nothing. Why?" He handed the cigarette back to Jen and she was looking at him intently but he wouldn't even give her one ounce of attention, she was probably having a field day from bumming a smoke with him.

"You were really good." I shrugged.

"Well I lost interest." He shrugged back.

And like that he didn't talk to me for the rest of the night. After Will's dismal of me I kept to just speaking with El and playing with her hair for the rest of the night. When it came time for everyone to leave Jen was the last to go, El and I were on the sofa, she was worn out, resisting the urge to fall asleep as her head kept falling and hitting my chest then she'd spring up and blink a couple of times before her head would just hit my chest again.

I looked towards the front door to see Will holding it open almost as if he was seconds away from shutting it in Jen's face. She was talking hurriedly and I saw his shoulders sink as he looked down at the ground. Jen stepped forward placing a hand on his cheek and Will had finally looked at her for what I thought was the first time that night. I could see him sigh as if what he were about to do was a chore before he leaned in and kissed her. I looked away then.

Ever since I had yelled at Will a year ago things had never been the same between us. With me being so caught up in El I had went at an issue I knew would strike a nerve with him because he stood in my way.

When we were younger and all the boys had developed crushes on Jennifer Hays, Will had confided to me that he actually didn't know what all the fuss was about. I didn't either if I'm being honest, it was human nature to follow what everyone else was doing. But what Will had or hadn't felt had a deeper meaning to him, and like an asshole I exploited that.

I looked up when I heard the door shut to see Will wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, sighing then spotting me.

"Oh, uh, mom doesn't do room checks or anything like that so you could sleep with her in her room if you wanted." He explained and I went red as I shook my head.

"Oh, no, no, I was gonna stay up for awhile actually. Maybe we could hang out? Play video games? I saw you have a Nintendo." I gestured toward the entertainment center and I looked back to see Will taking a step forward in hesitation, then he had winced pulling away again.

"I actually have an early training session with some friends." He looked at the floor again. "So I can't be up too late."

"So... you and Jen?" I asked, just wanting to keep him here just awhile longer.

"Yeah, she likes me a lot."

"And you?"

His lips went into a tight line and he gritted his teeth shaking his head slightly. His shoulders dropped for the second time tonight. Again he let out a sigh. A vision of atlas crossed my mind, and with that I remembered just how much Will had dealt back at home, from the the bullying to the abduction and possession. With this new life, this mask, he had successfully hid the trauma of the events of the upside down, the loss of a childhood. He and El held the weight of worlds on their shoulders and no one acknowledges it.

"Can I show you something?" Will asked quietly. And I nodded my head, carefully shuffling out from under El, resting her head on to the couch rather than my chest.

I followed him to the top of the basement stairs and quietly we both descended.

•••

Downstairs was covered with wood paneling and orange shag carpet, most of the furniture from their old house was down here, as well as a red mahogany billiards table.

There was a dark hall he took me down that had two rooms, one on the left was a laundry room, lit up by a red light.

"Jonathan's dark room." Will muttered quietly.

He led me to the door on the right. He held his hand on the door knob, breathing in deeply he opened it and it creaked open slowly, he stepped in flipping a switch and Christmas lights around the room had begun to noisily light up.

I walked in ahead of him this time taking a look around his bedroom. He had numerous cork boards filled completely to the edges with charcoal drawings, he ran out of surface area that he had begun to pin them on top of each other. At a second glance and to my utter horror the drawings were of the Shadow monster, demo-gorgon, the shed, Bob, Billy, the mall. They were incredibly realistic. Each one a horrific encounter he had witnessed. How could he possibly sleep in this room?

"The uh, the lights," He pointed at the Christmas lights. "It's just in case." He didn't even have to add more to that sentence.

Even a couple hundred miles distance would not stop Will from worrying that he'd get taken again.

"The drawings, they just sorta kept happening. Just like when I drew the tunnels. These images wouldn't stop crossing my mind and sometimes drawing it is the only thing that stops me from getting scared." He admitted.

His bed was disheveled. I noticed clothes were strewn about despite the empty hamper sitting by the closet. Then at his desk it was lit up by a lamp rather than the multicolored lights that adorned the ceiling. The cork board above his desk had graphite and colored pencil drawings. These pictures were far less frightening than the charcoal ones. I stepped forward to get a better look. I started at the upper left part of the board to see a drawing of El sitting on the couch reading, followed by another drawing of her sitting in the patio looking at the sunflowers there. Moving on there were sketches of small birds and leaves probably from his first autumn here. A drawing of his mother sitting at the dining table, chewing on a pen as she looked at a notebook. Another of his mother her eyes closed in sleep. Random ones of groups of people, crowded hallways, waving flags. Then I stopped at the bottom right corner where there was a sketch of us as kids behind a science trophy. But my heart picks up pace when I see one of me, in black and white I had my hand on my chin with a bored expression on my face and to the right of that was a colorful image of one of the guys I had seen at the kickback tonight.

Aaron. I had remembered only because he had been focused on El the whole night. But I didn't give away the fact that that's where my attention was focused.

"You lied to me earlier."

"I'm lying to everyone in my life at this point. What's one more lie?" He bit.

"Well not with me. Okay?" I turned to him them to see him leaning up against the far wall to watch me observe his room. "This summer you can tell me anything and I'll be here for you." I promised.

"Not likely. And besides your gonna be gone by the end of summer."

"Not by my choice." I snapped. "If I had it my way I'd be here with you and El." I tried to control my tone but I was just a little fed up with the cold shoulder from him. "There isn't shit for me in Hawkins! Everyone separated, they all moved on and got a fucking life and I stayed behind, everyday I go to school knowing that all I want to do is be here with El, everyday I had went home to my blowhard dad and my mom that just didn't understand. I was alone, Will. Every fucking day. And the only people that would understand were you, Max and El." I was panting from my outburst and his demeanor changed from hostile to listening.

"Why didn't you just... move on?" He asked quietly.

"Because I-" I put my hand to my face in stress as I dragged it down with a sigh. "I love her." I said in defeat.

The stony silence between us could be cut with a knife. As the seconds past Will's walls had come back up and he was back to the facade he had built with time spent here.

"I have to get to bed, I have to be up in six hours." He said. And with that I stormed away.

•••

What Will had said about room checks was true, because after my talk with Will last night I had come back upstairs to carry El to her room and she grogily asked me to stay.

And I awoke to her hair in my face. I tiredly combed it back into place with my fingers making her stir awake. Before we had both gone to bed last night she had taken off the overalls and I supplied her with my shirt to sleep in so we didn't have to get out of bed, and I opted to sleep in just my boxers because of how hot the dry summer air had made her room. It was a bold move and we were both blushing about it but eventually became too tired to care.

The blushes were back as she sat up, my shirt bunching up around her thighs. The contrast of our legs next to each other was laughable, because I was such a shut in back at home my legs were pasty white next to her tanned and toned legs that still presented a very angry looking scar.

"You're so hairy." She spoke out and I raised my brow in confusion as she poked my chest that had sparse hairs growing. I batted her hand away and she giggled.

"We should call the party, set things into motion so everyone can clear schedules and what not." I reminded her, grabbing her hand that was trying to poke at me and placed it over my heart.

"Of course." She said quietly looking at her hand touching my chest. I was about to pull her in to kiss me but she looked away towards the door, with a little gasp she had gotten up, my shirt falling to mid-thigh as she rushed to open the door. Before turning back to me combing her hair behind her ears.

"I gotta ask." I tilted my head to the side and she nodded crossing her arms. "The door? You always seemed worried about it. Is it because of the lab?" She had explained to me once that when she didn't do as she was told she would be locked in isolation for days. Nothing but metal walls and a cold tile floor.

"He wanted us to leave the door open." She said quietly.

Walking over to her vanity she had a music box which used to belong to Nancy, in it El had produced a folded paper and she seemed to hesitate even giving it to me but she did so anyways and sat at the end of the bed rather than next to me.

I opened it with ease as if it had been folded and refolded enough times that it could rip at the creases if I weren't careful.

** _There's something I wanted to talk to you both about. I know this is a difficult situation, but I care about you both very much. -_ **

I didn't understand what this was about until the tone had changed in the second paragraph.

** _Feelings. Jesus. Truth is, for so long I'd forgotten what those even were. I've been stuck in one place, in a cave you might say. A deep, dark cave. And then, I left some eggos out in the woods..._ **

Hopper. I braced myself for whatever came next. The last time I had seen him he had told me to be careful. And pathetically I thought had I told him the same maybe he'd still be here.

** _\- The hurt is good. It means you're out of that cave. But please, if you don't mind, for the sake of your poor old dad, keep the door open three inches._ **

** _Dad_ **

I folded the letter with tears threatening to overflow. I looked at El who was also crying but spoke to me in a very stern voice. "If you want to be with _me_, that door does _not_ shut, unless _I_ say so." Her tears dribbled down her face.

Again, she's managed to hide everything so well that now that I'm sitting in front of her and we're both crying, the memories come rising up. Firstly she had cried for days after the afrimation of Hopper's death due to the charred bodies found in the lab, all burned beyond being identifiable. Then she had cried because I hadn't cried, it took her awhile to believe me when I had told her that deep down I just can't fathom that he'd just die that easily. Then she had cried because she thought I was right and that even if I were, she would have no way to find him because her powers hadn't come back to her.

Again my head was replaying just how many times I have had to see terror in her eyes despite being the girl with the iron fists, how often she had cried and just the downright unfairness out of everything and how each occurrence gets worse and worse, taking more and more away from her each time. She hadn't done a thing to deserve the cards she was dealt.

Watching the person you love go through this is worse than going through it yourself.

Letting the tears fall I had nodded my head, reaching out to her and the tension in her body seemed to melt away from overwhelming sorrow and the desire to be held. She curled up in my arms and let lose her guttural sobs as she held the note in a closed fist. And she was muttering something about a charged battery and putting up a fight.

Breathlessly I agreed to the door rule and looking up I had the urge to laugh thinking how pleased that old man would be.

_Alright Hop, you win._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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	3. Gotta Broken Heart Again

"And over here is the compost bin, you know at times when there's plants that didn't get sold in time for the change in season we usually just put them here, any biodegradable foods you don't finish on your lunch break? Chuck it right in." Sheila, the agricultural and floral specialist slapped the compost bin and I laughed.

Misses Byers had managed to get me a job with _The Bloom Room,_ the local green house in town, a place just two blocks from the house and one that El frequented. Everyone seemed pretty laid back here, I know a little about plants, it shouldn't be that hard with my background in science and Hawkins' heavy studies on agriculture due to the large population of farm owners and successors. Joyce had really pushed to get me a job at _Circuit City_ at my request but they didn't want to take the risk on me and they weren't looking for a seasonal employee.

After the tour of the building and the training (they had really only needed me for cleaning and organizing, but still wanted me to learn something about plants which was cool) Shelia wrote me up a schedule then sent me home for the evening. I'd only work four days of the week from 8am till 5pm with Friday's and weekends off unless told otherwise.

When I had gotten to the house El and Joyce were both in the kitchen, El was chopping lettuce for a salad and Joyce had just taken chicken cutlets off the stove and put them in a serving dish over a bed of rice.

"Oh, hey Mike! How'd it go?" Joyce had greeted me and El merely smiled at me

"It was good. I like Sheila a lot." I said and Joyce smirked and sent me a knowing look.

"She's a firecracker, I'm glad you like her. That's actually one of their friend's mother," she snapped her fingers trying to remember and she turned to El for help. "Which one is Sheila's kid again? Arnold?"

"Aaron." She responded timidly finishing up with the salad and with that they had set the table and we sat down, Will's absence made obvious.

Joyce had kept looking at the clock as we ate, her leg bouncing with anxiety. She pushed back from the table springing up. "I should call-"

"He told you seven, it's only six-thirty." El stopped her in her tracks and Joyce laughed breathlessly.

"Y-yeah. You're right. He'd call and say otherwise." She said mostly to herself, going back to her meal, though she didn't really eat she had just pushed it around on her plate. Thrity minutes had gone by and sure enough Will had walked through the door, slamming it shut making El jump.

He tried to walk quickly past us since the stairs to the basement were in the kitchen but it was too late, I had caught a glimpse of the rusty red color on his nose and chin and so had Joyce and El.

"Hey, Hey, Hey! William!" He stopped at the top of the stairs with a groan. "What the hell is that?" She got up and tried to turn his face towards her but he turned away.

"Mom, it _nothing, _I'm fine. _Please _just let me go downstairs." He leaned on the threshold of the door and her eyes were wide as if he had made the most ridiculous request.

"You're _fine?!_ Will, there is blood on your face, now tell me what happened?" She reached to turn him again and he did only for us to gasp. His left eye was so purple and swollen it was almost black, his nose had dried blood that had ran down to his chin and his bottom lip was fat and split. The longer you looked the more damage we saw.

"It was just an accident." He looked at her in exasperation, just wanting to get out of here.

"An accident is a scrapped knee or a jammed finger, what did you accidentally run into someone's fist repeatedly?" She was frantic now leading him over to a chair at the dining table and I had gotten a closer look at his face. His eyebrow was cut and he was covered in bits of cut grass, he had also had bruises around his neck, goosebumps rose on my arms. And when he had lifted his hands to swat his mom away I saw that his knuckles were bleeding and swollen and his nails had dirt underneath them.

_He had tried to put up a fight._

Joyce kept trying to come at him in different angles with a wet rag as she continued to hound him and eventually he got so fed up he had grabbed her wrists and held her still.

"Stop Mom! Stop!" He had yelled, his voice cracking as if he had been yelling all night. "J-just, _pleas_e let me go." His tears had fallen and with his mom thoroughly shocked he let her go and sprinted down stairs and without really thinking about it I had went after him.

"Go, El." He muttered quietly once I had reached his door and when I hadn't left he turned then rolled his eyes (eye?) when he had seen it was me. "Go, Mike."

I stepped into his room shutting the door behind me, he was sat on the end of his bed and I carefully sat across from him at the chair at his desk.

"I'm not gonna ask what happened because it's pretty obvious." I joked and Will scoffed. "But I am gonna ask why? Why did this happen?" I saidmore seriously and he looked me directly in the eyes.

"I told the truth." Was all he had said before he began sobbing. "I told the truth and they hated me for it, and now he hates me. Last night I thought I could hold someone to the same regard as you, last night you had told me that I could tell you anything and in turn I thought that I could tell him." He heaved. "He's not you. I'm so stupid."

I was pretty confused. But I still knew Will well enough to connect some dots. I'm not a complete moron.

"You're not stupid." I looked around his desk for something to wipe his tears with but just gave up and stood using the bottom of my shirt, I carefully patted his face and tried to avoid his injuries and I sat back down pulling the chair up closer so we were practically knee to knee. "Come on, tell me what you said."

_"Mike." _He sighed shaking his head. "Don't, don't make me say it again."

"I meant what I said." I placed my hand over his. "You're safe, you're here in your room, in your home, your mom is upstairs and I'm right here and I'm not going to hurt you." He looked away. "You know that don't you?"

He looked at me again, The Bearer of the Heavens, with a pain I don't think I could ever come to understand. He believed in his heart of hearts that he could say something that would make me change my whole view on him.

I know what he needs to tell me, but I'd rather he say it himself than assume. So I waited until the look of hurt changed to one of determination.

But rather than him outright saying it he uttered a name. "Aaron." I nodded reassuringly. "There were moments." He hesitated again. "The ones that make your stomach flip."

He was looking at our hands intently thinking about his next words. "We had done things." Gulping he retreated his hand away from mine. "I-I thought- I never knew that it didn't mean the same to him. So when I admitted that it did, he," Will shut his eyes tightly, wincing because of the black eye. "He told his teammates that I tried making a move and they got me."

He stood up just then grabbing the closest thing to him and chucking it across the room, it was a cassette tape and it had cracked and fell apart.

"I'm not that scared little boy anymore. I didn't run away. I didn't beg for them to stop. And I am not weak. I stood my ground, I fought back, I was able to withstand everything they did to me and make it back home." He raked his fingers through his hair. "I'm gonna be okay." His split lip trembled, he sat back on the bed, his shoulders slumped and he tiredly spoke out. "Just why does it keep happening to me?"

"He was wrong for that, they all were. And I don't know why, I think about this shit everyday when it comes to you and El. You don't deserve this, you didn't deserve any of this. And don't you dare start thinking that there's anything wrong with you because you're the most selfless friend I have, you've done nothing wrong and I'm so sorry." I hugged him. "See? I know, okay? I know and I'm not about to beat the shit out of you for it because you did nothing wrong." I was rambling trying my best to reassure him. To be here. To be the friend he has been for me for the past ten years of my life.

"Mike, I can kick your ass." Will mumbled into my shoulder, his body loosening as tears of relief had fell, staining my shirt.

"Fuck you." I sniffled.

•••

"He had tried to explain." El tucked her head under my chin, we were cuddled up in her bed after I had helped Will clean his injuries (from the teachings of Max). "I didn't know that he had felt for Aaron as I feel for you." Her fist clenched in my shirt. "If I had my powers Aaron and the baseball boys would not wake to see another day." She admitted.

"Then it's probably a good thing you're dormant." I mused quietly. "The hell they'd be met with. As much as I wish it too, we can't keep fighting fire with fire. At least not with a bunch of teenagers."

"Half of the town probably already knows." She whispered. "We escape one shitty place just to get trapped in another."

With that morbid thought we sat in silence, both thinking about Will.

"I made the calls today. Dustin is free pretty much whenever for however long, same with Max, I kept calling the Sinclair's and I made Erica wake Lucas up to talk." She smiled. "He said he'd be able to in two weeks, he's taking Wednesday through Monday off to come down." She snuggled up closer. "It's like my family is coming together again."

"Nancy should be going to Hawkins soon." I mindlessly traced my fingers up and down her spine.

"Yeah, mom said Johnathan is going with her." I could just feel her beginning to fall asleep. I paused for a second realizing that she had just called Joyce _mom _but I continued on my path letting myself doze off too.

•••

"Hey you piece of shit, you took my Kiss cassette and I want it back." I startled at the sight of Max suddenly in the kitchen, she was wearing cut off jean capris and a black t shirt with various (maybe intentional) rips and tears. She had a red duffle bag at her feet and a bag on her back. She hadn't even settled in before she laid into me.

"Hi to you too." I rolled my eyes getting up from the dining table I held my hand out to her and she looked at it for a second before smirking, she grabbed her duffel bag off the floor and handed it to me and she was back to smiling again.

"Missed you Bird-Brain." She ruffled my hair and I shoved her away.

"El's gone at training, so you won't see her until after 6." I led her to El's room, placing her bag on the end of El's bed, Max kicked off her shoes and sat pushing herself back on the bed until she was leaning on the wall, then she had looked around the room.

"Wow, very... girly. Kinda planer than I'd thought it'd be."

"Well not every girl is going to decorate their room with Sex Pistol posters and dirty socks." Max scoffed and kicked her foot at me when I sat on the bed too but I slapped her leg away. "And I have a feeling she's worried she'll just have to move again."

Max nodded. "So Will's here? El said he had gotten hurt but she didn't tell me anything else."

"Yeah, he's downstairs sleeping. He got messed up pretty bad, a whole damn baseball team went after him." I sighed and Max sat up rasing her brow.

"The hell? What could Will have possibly done for anyone to go after him?"

"A lots changed with them, Max." I laid down on my back in exhaustion covering my eyes with my hands, my legs hanging off the bed but so damn long they still reached the floor. "I can't tell you everything because it's not mine to tell, but what I can say is that the main person we have to look out for is a kid named Aaron."

"Well you let me know if you see that kid, then I'm kicking his ass."

"Who's ass we kicking?" I uncovered my eyes and lifted my head to see Lucas standing there.

"_Lucas_." Max said quietly, in small shock and I looked at her in confusion, it suddenly dawned on me that these two have had zero contact pretty much since school had gotten out.

"Hey buddy." I sighed.

"_Hey buddy." _He mocked. "I haven't seen your ass in almost two months and that's it?"

"I forgot how annoying you are." Max muttered and I sat up with much effort. Then walked into Lucas' open arms where he hugged me tightly and clapped my back making me wince.

"You'll never believe how I got here-" He had started to say but we all heard the front door open again.

"Hey asshole, you forgot the rest of your stuff!"

Walking down the hall we were greeted with the sight of Dustin throwing down a bunch of bags. "Oh, Mike." He sighed in relief. "Boy am I glad to see you after dealing with this guy for more than 300 miles." He hugged me then stepped back to flip Max off with both hands and she scoffed.

"What the hell did I do?"

"You and your _buddies _laughed at me in the cafeteria back in March, so fuck you." He turned then heading out the door again before coming back in with two more bags.

"Wait, did you _drive_ here?" I walked over to the door to see an AMC Hornet. "What the hell? When did you get wheels?"

"April, two weeks after my birthday, they have that graduated licence system." He then looked at all of us panting from carrying all the bags. "And you guys would know all of this had you made an effort to actually reach out and talk," He looked at Lucas. "And not call someone last minute just to hitch a ride."

"Hey! We got caught up on the ride here, you're still into science stuff, I mean you told me a lot about that woman who had a baby that wasn't hers." Dustin, Max and I all gave each other confused stares before Dustin rolled his eyes.

"It's called gestational surrogacy you ass wipe, and it just means we're one step closer to procreation through incubation rather than-"

"Neat, anyways your car?" Max interrupted and Dustin just glared at her before grabbing his bags.

"Just show me where I'm staying. This is going to be a long five days." And with that Lucas and Dustin followed me to my room, because I didn't know how to tell them about Will just yet.

•••

"So?"

"So what?" Lucas and I had decided to sit out on the screened in porch while everyone else pretty much took naps. I had just gotten home from my shift when Max came and had yet to take a nap myself but Lucas was wide awake and wanted company.

"How are they? Will? El?"

"They were fine." I shrugged. "Will joined a tennis team, El joined swim and they both made a lot of friends."

"They _were _fine?"

"Until last night," I looked towards the back door, any second El would be home from team bonding. "Uh, Will's here."

Immediately Lucas stood heading for the door but I stopped him.

"He's here, but he got hurt pretty bad last night." I stopped myself not really knowing how to breach the subject, not exactly knowing how anyone else would take Will's situation and if they'd be with him _or __against__ him._

"This kid Aaron kinda lured him in and got his buddies to jump Will." I admitted and Lucas nodded his jaw tensing.

"Was it like Troy?"

I looked at him in confusion, I hadn't thought about Troy Harrington in years, despite the fact that his brother is a major confidante to our huge secret, he keeps to himself now, has a serious girlfriend and is defensive back for the football team. But these changes don't erase the torment enacted as kids.

** _"Will's in fairy-land now anyways. Flying around _ _with_ _ all the other fairies, _ _happy_ _ and gay!"_ **

Troy had been the one to brand us throughout intermediate school. I was frog-face, Dustin was toothless, Will was every homosexual slur in the book and they had called Lucas Bamboula _once _but once Lucas had stepped up to them for their racial slur, they had taken to just calling him a loser.

Lucas was someone you didn't want to piss off. He was also someone that could take a lot of shit until he reached his breaking point. So when I confirmed his suspicions with a nod he closed his eyes with a heavy sigh.

"So?"

"So what?"

"What's the plan?" He said crossing his arms across his chest, displaying how big his arms were. When I didn't answer he had rolled his eyes and pushed at my shoulder. "C'mon are we kicking this kids ass or not?"

"We're not, I mean I have no control of what you decide to do, but I'm not gonna do that to them."

"Do what? Stand up for them?" He took a step closer to me and I knew I had to try my best to deescalate the situation, but I myself was getting pissed off.

"You're not looking at this rationally it's just going to make things much worse-"

"So if something were to happen to any of us you wouldn't step up? What if something happened to El again huh? You wouldn't fight for her?"

At that I stepped up to him, I was still the tallest in the group and he seemed to remember the fact as well when I had gotten in his face out of anger. "She's been fighting her entire life! She's finally, _finally _able to live somewhat of a normal life and Will has been through enough shit, we don't need to had more gas to the fire. We just need to wait for this shit to pass and be there for him when he needs us." I stepped back a bit to clear my head before I looked at him again and he was still mad, but he was now considering what I had said. "Will's tougher than you think. And he doesn't need us to fight for him. He just needs us to be his friends."

At that I could hear the front door open, and El had begun calling for me.

"Just know, if I find out who that kids is, there's no telling what I'd do." He said gravely before putting on a smile and leaving to greet El.

•••

Joyce had gotten home late and greeted both Dustin and Lucas who were in the living room with El and I before she announced she was going to bed early that night.

"Has she been okay?" Dustin asked and El looked after her as Joyce ascended the stairs.

"She's been a work an awful lot," She said quietly. "I told her to use as much of Hops money as she wants, but she still works." El slumped against me and I pulled her in closer. 

"I feel like I got hit by a truck." Max groaned as she walked down the hall rubbing her eyes. "Why'd you let me sleep that long, Big Bird?" She asked me and I rolled my eyes.

"I was busy." 

She scoffed, which turned into a yawn and she sat on the couch beside Lucas who made a point to move away as she did so.

"Oh believe me, I don't want to sit by you either." She growled.

"Then don't." Lucas shrugged and El lifted her head up to look between the two.

"You used to love each other. What happened?"

"Well she-"

"Oh no, don't you start that shit, it was his fault." She crossed her arms. "It happened in the beginning of the school year. He told me to meet him after he had gotten out of tryouts for basketball and I go only to see him and Cindy Hale laughing about me."

"Laughing about you? It wasn't even that serious Max, it was just stating the obvious."

"That I'm a heinous bitch?!" She screamed and they both stood to their feet both starting to talk a mile a minute over each other.

It wasn't until Dustin gasped that I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Will had walked into the living room and sat on the arm of the sofa, watching them argue in amusement.

"So?"

"So? We're through! I hate your stinking guts Sinclair!"

"Guys-"

"Ditto!"

"Guys!"

They both stopped Max was getting ready to tear into me when she had also seen Will. "_Holy shit_." She uttered out, unable to keep the words from tumbling out it seems.

Will's bruises from yesterday had darkened significantly, although the swelling went down on his eye and lip, purple bloomed in places it wasn't present before.

"Hey Will." Dustin practically crooned out, like soothing a distressed baby. At that Will grimaced and stood to head to the kitchen and Lucas leaned over and wacked Dustin on the arm.

"_What_? What'd I say?"

Both El and I looked at each other before both heading to the kitchen to see him.

He was stood at the counter shoveling cereal in his mouth by the time we had reached him and he looked at us briefly before shoveling more in.

"I should have brought you some food, I'm sorry-" El had begun to say but Will held his hand up to stop her, shaking his head.

"No El, it's fine." He spoke through bites. "I needed to come up here to see everyone anyways." At that The rest of the party made their way into the kitchen, Max and Lucas staying on opposite sides of the kitchen.

"Hey man, how are you feeling?" Lucas approached Will with open arms and he meekly returned it, it was the first glimpse I've seen of the old Will in awhile. But I don't know if that's a good thing, there's two different _old Will'_s, the one who was very shy, and sweet and the one who was very quiet and scared and submissive. The latter is what I'm searching for in him.

"It's nothing, I swear." He tried to reassure everyone and everyone shared looks of doubt with each other. "You should see the other guys then." He grumbled going back to his cereal.

"For real?" Lucas asked with an exited edge to his tone, surprising Will. "Byers got juice now?"

"If I wasn't eating this cereal I'd kick your ass just to prove it." He quipped, Max dropped her mouth in shock while everyone else laughed, except for El who was still looking at him with concern.

"This is _insane, _it's like I walked into an alternate universe," Dustin snapped his fingers. "Speaking of which, the upside down."

Everyone froze as he ran out of the room only to come back seconds later with a note book, he threw it on the counter in front of us and he crossed his arms."I have reason to believe it's still open, all the notes are there, every news article I could find about the same strange occurrences and phenomenon that happened in Hawkins, only it's global." He opened the notebook to the first page which had a map folded up inside, once he spread it out we could see red circles all across the map ranging from Canada to Japan.

My heart plummeted. And I began to take notice of El's breathing picking up speed and I acted quickly.

"We're gonna have to dissect everything some other time, alright Dustin? Maybe when we get home I can help you with it-"

"When we get home? You're not gonna talk to me when we get home, asshole."

"I'm tired." I snapped. "And so is El." I turned her around and headed for her room with her and she seemed stuck in a daze as she just let me pull her along.

"Max." She said quietly.

"What?"

"Max. She sleeps with me." El reminded me and I looked at her opened door for a second before sighing.

"She can take my room for the night, _hell_ for the whole weekend." I tried to dismiss her but she put her hand on my face to get my attention.

"I'm okay." She whispered, looking back and forth between both of my eyes. "And she would never forgive me for leaving her out there around Lucas."

"But what if you have a nightmare?"

She looked at me confused. "I don't have nightmares."

"Yes. You do. Every time I've been around you while you're sleeping you've had one." I watched her closely as she continued to look perplexed but she shook her head, getting back to the topic at hand.

"I'll be fine, Max is just as capable of helping me, now _go." _She brushed her nose against mine and I groaned in defiance, kissing her shoulder before bowing out of the room stepping forward for one final kiss but she giggled and shut the door on my pursed lips.  



	4. The Faded Sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the inside for the past year has been a silent war raging on with the hollow shell of a person I've become verses the twitchy kid who had big dreams and was the leader. I've fallen out of touch with that part of myself and I have yet to really admit that Dustin's research excites me, it's like dealing with the upside down is some kind of true calling but if anyone knew how I felt, not just anyone, if El knew how I felt she'd be horrified that I thrived most when I was solving problems from the nether. It was just nice having that purpose and with the prospects of something being on the horizon I just wanted that opportunity to do something, going back to reality after fighting monsters was such a chore.

"What does this do?" I heard Max ask and I turned to look only to be sprayed in the face. "Oh, it does that."

Today I went back into work to water the low-lights and mist the high humidity plants and Max was the only other person awake as early as me. I let her come out of pity, I know that Lucas being here is ripping her to shreds on the inside but she'd never tell me that.

With a sigh, and slightly regretting my decision I shut the hose off and threw my gardening gloves on top of the register counter.

"Wanna go get breakfast?" I asked and she looked at me with surprise before nodding.

Down the block was one of the 4 restaurants in town, which was a shabby little diner called _Junipers._

"So, how are things with El?" She asked once the waitress took our drink orders.

"Every time I come down she changes pretty significantly. I kinda have to get to know her all over again but we're still comfortable with each other. I mean she's really sassy this time around and really likes to joke around which is cool."

"But?"

I grimace. "I feel like she's hiding too much." I rushed to explain. "She's been suppressing so much of what happened just to fit in that I think she never had a chance to compartmentalize everything."

Max looked down at the table and spoke lowly. "Well you know my mom tried to make me go to therapy because of Billy." She looked at me again, showing her softer side. It took awhile but I'm glad she's not being so brash. "Nothing is ever really going to help me get rid of those sights. I can't even imagine how El could function."

"She's the toughest girl I know." Max nodded solemnly in agreement and I reached out to pat her hand. "You're a close second."

She smiled sweetly, setting off a warning bell in my head as she grabbed my hand and began popping my fingers.

"Hey! Hey! Hey!" I pulled my hand away shaking it off in pain as she practically cackled. "That causes arthritis you maniac."

"That's a myth." She reached for my hand again and I slapped hers away. We were laughing so loud I almost didn't hear the people talking about us.

"_That's real cute, __I__miss__ when we'd goof off like them."_

_"Young love. _ _It's_ _ gross."_

At that I smacked the top of her hands a little harder than intened and she pulled back with her eyes wide before she started laughing again. "Holy shit Wheeler, chill out!"

•••

"You know, I'm glad you're able to get away from home." We were walking back to the house, I decided to take her through the longer route through the dirt path to see the neighborhood gardens. This place is filled with so much green I'm going to miss it.

"Yeah? Why's that?" I looked down at her and she shrugged looking off towards a garden that had a cluttering of lawn ornaments.

"You were getting depressed." I stopped and she kept walking but stopped as well and turned around. "Oh come on, it was pretty obvious. If I hadn't dragged you out of the house those couple of times you would just sit at home all by yourself doing nothing but taking apart all your consoles and putting them back together again."

"Being away from her-"

"So what? Just because you're apart doesn't mean you just stop living. I mean she clearly didn't, she's well adjusted, has friends and is involved with school. You can't just let life go by just waiting for things to come back together," She turned away from me. "Sometimes things never come back together the way you want it anyways." She then turned and walked quickly towards me poking an intimidating finger in my chest. "So don't you dare revert back to how things were when we were home. It didn't feel right and it freaked me the fuck out."

"I didn't know you cared that much." I snarked and she retracted her hand and waved it dismissively.

"I've never had friends like this before Wheeler, sue me for wanting to hold onto them for just a bit longer, besides with us being best friends we gotta look out for each other." She started walking again and I looked after her in confused amusement.  
•••

When we got back to the house everyone except Dustin was gone, Lucas and Will had went on a walk together and were probably going to go swimming later on, El got invited out by some friends to go shopping and Joyce was at work.

Max was looking through their records in their tv hutch and Dustin finally came running from downstairs, he threw a stack of papers onto my lap and I startled.

"When we're you gonna tell me that he's been doing that shit." He pointed at the charcoal covered papers and I carefully moved them to the coffee table to not make a mess.

"It wasn't mine to tell." I was going for timid but the words came out harsh, I was getting more and more irritable from people thinking I'm some kind of busybody. "If you wanna ask him about it I'm sure he'll tell you." I tried to get up but he pushed me back down.

"No you're not leaving this time, do you understand how many times I've tried to get a hold of you?" He was at his wits end as well.

"Dusty just chill out-" Max tried to intervene but Dustin turned quickly to shout at her.

"You're just as bad as he is! Actually worse! You purposely avoided me, you mocked me and damn near bullied me and for what? Doing what makes me happy? What no come back this time Red? You fall off your skateboard one to many times?" He taunted she her jaw went tight as she crossed her arms and let him keep on.

"Alright, Dustin. Let's talk, say whatever it is you want and I'll tell you what I can." I shrugged. I'm over getting into these senseless fights, we are each boiling over with things left unsaid and I just feel like I've been getting the worst of it from everyone.

"Well I tried to talk last night but you said you were tired."

"Read the room dipshit. You brought up the upside down, no one was prepared to hear about it, especially not El and certainly not Will." I sighed and Dustin struggled to unzip his bag and once he did he produced the same notebook from last night.

"Well as I was saying," He opened up the map again and shoved the books off the coffee table before placing it down, Max reluctantly walked over and sat on the floor and I leaned in closer from my spot on the couch to see as he pointed out the black x's. "The black x's are for us, one for Hawkins, one for Willowbrook."

"Who's this for?" Max pointed west on the map and Dustin smiled.

"Utah, Suzie."

"Still?" I asked in disbelief.

"El?" He asked in return and I let it go.

"Alright well, the red circles are where there has been phenomenons similar to what we've experienced in Hawkins. Just instances of an electromagnetic field disrupting towns and oblivious confusion from citizens." He sat back and looked to me. "Pick a circle and I can tell you what happened there."

I looked over the map putting my finger down on Canada and he looked at its points on the grid before grabbing the notebook and flipping through to the coordinates. "Here." He showed it to me, and on its page was a news article, _Hinton Train Collision, 23 Dead._

"I don't get it, it's just a train accident."

"Well, if you took the time to actually read the article rather than just the headline it was saying that the electrical engine on the train short circuited. Electric trains emit a electromagnetic field of 300 volts per meter meaning that it'd take a pretty big magnet to disrupt it's mechanics, ergo our friends back at Hawkins lab still might be at work, maybe they opened more gates-"

"Or maybe it's not even Hawkins Lab." Max said quietly. Dustin nodded and Max grabbed the notebook from him to look at more instances. And I sat back in stupefied horror. If Dustin' s right, and he usually is, that means we're not just dealing with one gate to the upside down. But from his map it looks like we're dealing with hundreds maybe even thousands of gates.

"How did you even manage to gather all of these international articles?" I asked, because it was impressive and annoying that he went though such lengths.

"Library and anytime I would go into the city I would check recycling bins for the New York Times. And Times magazine pulled through a couple of times. More than I could say for you guys." He snarked and I was about to say something back but the sliding back door had opened and El had called for me. "Put this shit away, I don't want her to worry until we figure something out." I grabbed the map off the table and Dustin was freaking out about mishandling it so I shoved it towards him before bounding off towards the kitchen to intercept her.

"Oh, hey." She stepped back because I was coming in too hot but she accepted my brief kiss before pulling back and placing her bags on the counter. "I got you something today."

"Thanks." I said without thinking, making her laugh.

"You haven't even seen it yet." After rummaging in one of the bags she produced a blue paperback book with the title _Running Dog_.

"I saw that other book you were reading and it looked worn and it was practically highlighted all over. Must've been a really good book so I asked the shop keep if they could find something by the same author and this was the only one they had." She placed it in my hands smiling to herself and I didn't have the heart to tell her that I had read this book before but I didn't have my own copy of it so for that I was grateful.

"Maybe you could read it to me before bed. Hop used to read me a story, I can't remember the name of it but I remember the character was talking about how she loved October. I don't know, anyways it'd be nice to listen to you read me to sleep." She rambled and I blushed.

"This isn't a good bedtime story. Just trust me." I tried to change the subject but she crossed her arms and waited for me to explain.

"I've fought bad men, blasted people across rooms with my powers, you think I'm gonna get scared by a book?" She raised her brow and my heart stumbled over itself in a small moment of realization that this isn't the same girl I found in the woods almost five years ago.

"Alright, it's about a journalist trying to get her hands on Hitler's sex tape." I slapped the palm of my hand with the book. "Now, do you prefer me to do funny voices or just read normally?"

She stood with her mouth open for a second before she closed it and rolled her eyes, taking all of her bags off the counter she walked away with a slight blush, calling Max to follow her to her room.

•••

The next day was just another day of Max following me around work. This time she actually sat and watched instead of touching everything.

"So. Your girlfriend bought you a book about Hitler Porn." I stopped watering the roses to look at her. "Rad." Was all she said making me laugh.

"Correction, a book about finding Hitler porn."

"Tomato, tamato."

I kept watering, listening to the water _woosh_ out, the rack of wind chimes twinkling together and some birds chirping.

"I-is it weird that I keep forgetting that El's old enough to know things." I said not even wanting to look at Max but she threw a pebble at my side making me drop the hose.

"Wow, it's almost as if she has a whole brain and mind of her own. Crazy stuff Big Bird." She mocked and I walked over to turn the faucet off before sitting beside her on the edge of the flower bed.

"I'm being dumb aren't I?"

She ruffled my hair, pushing my head away. "She's really good at learning Wheeler. She's learned to adapt to what she's given." She shrugged and I looked over at her. "This time around she was given a class that taught a simple fact." She looked over the greenhouse with a Cheshire grin. "It wasn't a damn stork that brought her here."

•••

By the time we got back to the house me and Max were laughing hysterically talking back and forth about Richard Pryor.

It felt like ages ago but one night Max had been too inebriated to go home so her friends dropped her off at my house. She told me to look through her bag to find her sweater but all I had found were multiple tapes of Richard Pryor stand-up shows. She still doesn't know how she ended up with them (most likely she stole them from whatever house party she was at) but with nothing else to really do we sat up through most of the night watching the tapes.

"Is it bad to bring up the fact that he lit himself on fire?" She started laughing again and I looked at her in slight horror trying to hold back laughter of my own.

"Oh god, it shouldn't be funny, definitely shouldn't be laughing." But I was laughing anyways.

We both walked through the door laughing and I was greeted with the sight of El sitting on the couch. She was smiling at first but when she frowned at the two of us I cut my laughter off with a cough. Max kept laughing and patted me to get my attention.

"What, why'd you stop?" She looked towards El and smiled at her.

"Where'd you guys go?" She asked.

"I had work, Max tagged along." Max nodded beside me. I hated feeling like I did something wrong, I wasn't trying to be defensive.

She looked at us for a second longer before shaking her head. "Everyone is out back swimming, I'm gonna join them." I just noticed she was wearing a floral print wrap skirt and blue swim suit.

"Cool, I'm gonna get my suit on." Max shoved me out of her way as she walked towards El's room and with her out of the room I grabbed El's hand before she could retreat.

"Hey, what's wrong?" I asked softly and she looked down shaking her head.

"It's stupid."

"But you're bothered, just tell me and I can help." Back at home I usually disliked the couples that would be talking like this but I can't stand when it's like this, last year was bogus and unnecessary drama, but we both learned a lot from it. I learned that I should have stepped back and let El make her own choices, and El had learned that she was becoming to dependent on me. Everything I excused for being protective of her, which for the most part was true but after reading Hopper's letter I will never be the one to shut the door again. She has 100% control of what she wants to experience, and I can worry all I want but I won't go against her anymore.

"You guys got really close back home." She said quietly. "And it's stupid because I should be happy you guys aren't fighting anymore."

"Trust me, we still fight." I pulled her in and she hit her forehead to my chest.

"I still feel upset about it, like you guys could be something more."

"We're just friends, actually we're not even that close we just ended up together a lot in class and stuff." I shrugged. "I wouldn't be surprised to find out that she's just hanging around me just to trash talk me to her friends back at home." I joked and El rolled her eyes.

"You guys need to give her more credit. No one in this group has had it easy. She might be rough on the outside but she cares."

"Well, whatever you don't have to worry and as far as I'm concerned you're my best friend, just don't tell the boys." I smiled down at her and she tried to hold her own back but she just shook her head at me with a soft smiling leaning in to kiss me.

"I think I'd like to stick to being your girlfriend." 

***

It was dark out by the time we had gotten done swimming. Max decided to hang back inside and call her mom to check in on her which sounded off to me because Max couldn't stand to be around her mother the older she got.

We sat around the dining table wrapped in swim towels as Joyce brought scalloped potatoes out of the oven, the table was filled with food and once she set the potatoes down everyone dug in.

"I was a little afraid this wouldn't have been enough." Joyce laughed but she gave Lucas a look when he had threw a bread roll at Dustin. "So, you kids doing anything else exciting over the summer?"

Dustin nodded trying to muster through all the food he had just put into his mouth. "I'm actually starting an internship at _Eli Lilly_, it's this great pharmaceutical company and I'd only really be doing reception work, but hey, gotta get my foot in the door somehow."

We all looked at him in astonishment as he continued to stuff his face. And Joyce looked happy for him. "I had no idea you were interested in medicine Dustin."

"Well you would've known if your son learned how to use a damn phone." He muttered as he took a drink and El huffed in annoyance, kicking him under the table.

Will threw his napkin down on his plate and laughed. "Alright Dustin, when are you gonna let it go? Because it's getting old." It was like he threw down the gauntlet and Dustin sat back as well and Joyce threw her hands up grabbing her plate telling us that she's not getting involved. If my mom were here she'd shut this shit down faster than Jimmy Carter shut down the government.

"I keep bringing it up because it was a shitty thing for all of you to do. And not one of you has apologized for it."

Will looked around the table before pointing at Lucas. "Do you feel sorry? How about you Mike? Max?" We all hadn't said anything, mine was more out of not wanting more conflict but that's all that seems to be happening to me lately. "I don't feel sorry, sorry for what? _Sorry Dustin for not calling I was too busy starting over in a whole other town away from everything I've ever known_, or, _Hey I would've called had it not been for the crippling nightmares I have every night , _or _Sorry Dustin that I didn't keep in contact with you, me and El were too busy trying to deal with the trauma of the fucking upside down_." He shoved away from the table and his chair fell back making all of us jump and El was on her feet to getting ready to deescalate the situation. Will was stood there huffing it was a scary sight to see considering he was still bruised head to toe, the veins in his neck were protruding and he starting taking deeper breaths before stumbling back and El was there to make sure he hadn't fallen.

"Hey man, you need to sit down." Lucas sprung up and led him to his own chair. "You're probably gonna pass out if you don't calm down."

"What's wrong with him?" El asked heading towards the living room, probably to go get Joyce if need be.

"Hey, Will?" Lucas crouched to his knees getting on eye level with him. "Did you hit your head really hard when you got those bruises?" I was relieved when he hadn't asked him outright about when he got jumped.

"Uh, yeah, yeah, he- they kicked me pretty hard."

Lucas nodded before standing up. "Yep. He has a concussion."

"Well he needs rest." Dustin spoke up on his end of the table. "There's not really anything else we can do." He shrugged and El came back over slipping her arm around Will's torso and putting his arm around her shoulders. I stepped forward quickly, realizing that he probably didn't want her to see his drawings downstairs, besides Will has bulked up so much that it'd be hard to get him downstairs without dropping him. But before I could tell El to let me take him Dustin stepped up.

"I'll take him." He said quietly. "And I'll stay with him tonight, I have a lot to make up for." El nodded quietly and handed him off and we all watched as they went down the stairs together

***

Lucas had began packing when we went back to my room because he changed his mind and was going home, he didn't want to miss out on too much baseball practice after being convinced by Will yesterday to keep with it. I wasn't about to fight him on it, his dad had even hoped he'd come home earlier, he sent him here with the money to get a bus ride back.

"I wished I wasn't working so much so we could've hung out more." I marked my place in the book El got me watching as he zipped his bag shut.

"I wanna say that we can just hang out when you get back home," He looked at me trying to hold back a laugh. "But we both know that shit ain't gonna happen."

"Never say never."

He threw his bag down by the door before coming back over and sitting on my bed. "Who are we kidding Mike? I mean it wasn't so bad, it didn't feel wrong, we were just doing our own thing and I'm _very_ good at my thing." On the outside I just nodded in agreement but on the inside for the past year has been a silent war raging on with the hollow shell of a person I've become verses the twitchy kid who had big dreams and was the leader. I've fallen out of touch with that part of myself and I have yet to really admit that Dustin's research excites me, it's like dealing with the upside down is some kind of true calling but if anyone knew how I felt, not just anyone, if _El_ knew how I felt she'd be horrified that I thrived most when I was solving problems from the nether. It was just nice having that purpose and with the prospects of something being on the horizon I just wanted that opportunity to do something, going back to reality after fighting monsters was such a chore.

Nothing is worth putting El in danger though.

"I'm gonna go shower. I have to be up early to go to work anyways, I might not get to say bye." I sighed and he walked over to give me a tight hug, we both clapped each other on the back then pulled back to put our hands together like that scene in _Predator_, he's Carl and I'm Arnold. We both chuckled from the exchange and I made my way out of the room to head to the bathroom.

Just as I was reaching for the door handle the door opened itself and I was suddenly stood there in front of Max, whose eyes were red and puffy and still had tears rolling down her cheeks.

"_Asshole_." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments and messages I got last time! It really means a lot! English isn't my first language so sorry if I mess up anywhere. Also after this week I'm going to try to update every Friday but just know things might not work out because I'm starting University next week! Thanks for reading!


	5. Condition of The Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Torment and misery are velocious to make dotage pertinent.
> 
> Committing to peril redeems life
> 
> But failing exonerates time.
> 
> A.G.Ledesma

_Just as I was reaching for the door handle the door opened itself and I was suddenly stood there in front of Max, whose eyes were red and puffy and still had tears rolling down her cheeks._

"_Asshole_."

She then proceeded to shut the door in my face but I stopped it before it could shut. "Max?" I pushed in and she gave up going to sit on the edge of the tub. I shut the door behind me taking a cautious seat in front of her on the toilet. And she turned her face away from me. I honestly don't know what to do, the only times I've seen her cry had been about Billy. So I took the natural course of action and asked what an idiot would ask. "Are you okay?"

She turned to look at me with a glare but it didn't fill me with fear like it usually would (okay maybe a little fear) because as she glared more tears fell from her eyes and instead of reeling back to punch me like she would have (should have) she covered her eyes with her hands and started to sob. 

"You guys think I'm really that horrible?" She uttered out.

"No I don't think you're horrible, what are you talking about?" When she didn't answer me I called her name softly and she looked at me again.

"I _heard_ you Mike, you told El that I'm only friends with you because I want to talk behind your back. Do you really think that I'd do that?" She didn't look mad anymore, it looked like she genuinely feared that she was portrayed this way. 

"No, of course not." I put my hand to my forehead. "I was just kidding when I had said it, you're one of my best friends."

"Didn't sound like it." Instead of the usual biting edge she had it just sounded broken. "And Lucas and Dustin hate me too. Dustin doesn't understand what happened that day when we were laughing at him in the cafeteria, he had toilet paper on his shoe, that's something I've only see in movies," She shook her head. "Maybe I should have told him instead of just laughing, but he took it the wrong way and I didn't know that he'd hold a grudge for it." 

Now we're all well aware of how Dustin could hold a grudge.

She rubbed at her eyes furiously. "And then fucking Lucas and Cindy Hale. She asked him if I was a bitch all the time or if it was just an act, and the asshole," She shook her head in disbelief. "My own boyfriend told her that I was a _heinous bitch_, of all the times he decides to go out and learn a new word it's one to insult me? My own boyfriend did that, and sure we had argued a lot but not more than we loved each other. I just couldn't look at him the same knowing that when I wasn't around to hear what he thought of me, that's what came out, just like what you said with El today." She was back to crying again. "You just gotta know that our friendship means the world to me , Wheeler. And I'm sorry if I ever made you feel bad, I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm just like fucking Billy." She put her face in her hands again and I got off the toilet to crouch in front of her.

"Hey, nothing's wrong with you and you're nothing like Billy." I grabbed her hand to pull it away from her face and she looked at me like she didn't believe me. "I can't speak for the others, but when I said all that stuff, it was because El got the wrong idea about me and you. She thought we had feelings for each other and it was dumb to say what I did." She looked away and I called her name softly. "Max?" She looked at me like it took a lot of effort to do so. "I'm sorry."

It all happened so quick and yet it was like I had seen it in slow motion, I think it was because my brain had went into shock. After my apology Max's lip trembled before she launched herself into me, her arms going around my neck as she connected her lips to mine. And me, being caught off guard, I fell back into the cabinets and I had wrapped my arms around her not thinking that she'd go down with me. Her lips continued to connect and reconnect onto mine and my brain finally decided to do something and it was to make a whiny noise of panic and push against her shoulders. She pulled back and I had my mouth open in astonishment and at first she had a hazy look over her face before she looked back and forth between my eyes, her own mouth fell open in horror.

We both scrambled away from each other, I had to catch my balance before I fell into the tub and she had her back against the door her hands clutched to the roots of her hair. We were both breathing heavy, once our eyes met we both quickly looked away.

_"What the hell was that?! Do you know what you just did? Who just jumps someone like that and kisses them?"_

_"I wasn't thinking, you were just being so nice and I was emotional you and your dumb nice face."_

We both started talking at the same time and she sighed. "I'm going to bed, forget this _ever_ happened, Wheeler." 

She turned to open the door, "Max, you can't just-" But it was too late, she had left and shut the door behind her and I was left to freak out about whatever the hell this was.

***

I hadn't slept at all the whole night, because by the time I had gotten to my room Lucas was asleep and I was over the fact that she had kissed me but I was now worried about what to tell El. I mean it wasn't my fault she kissed me, but this could easily just be forgotten if I kept it to myself. And just when I felt a small semblance of tiredness a new thought came into my head, why had that been Max's first instinct? The possibility of her liking me was discombobulating, it unsettled me to know that the whole time we were joking around, all the times we were at my house alone, the parties she took me to, anytime she would try something new she would bring me along for the ride. Was I unintentionally leading her on? Was getting that close to her wrong on my behalf?

With a new ounce of guilt added to my pile of things to worry about I rolled over only to hear my alarm sound for work. Lucas stirred but didn't wake, how would he feel if I told him about what transpired merely hours ago with his ex-girlfriend?

_I'm in deep shit._

***

Work went by slowly, I actually found myself missing Max's company despite the fact that she was a nuisance when she came here. We had laughed a lot in each others presence and I was filled with disappointment on my walk home, because things probably wouldn't go back to the way they were. 

_It wasn't a bad kiss._

My subconscious threw the thought at me and I almost tripped. Regardless if it were a good or bad kiss nothing will come of it. I have a choice to either tell El straight out what happened or act like it never happened in the first place. But I still had to talk to Max about it just to make sure if we were to keep it to ourselves it'd be for good. That and I had to make sure there was nothing more behind that kiss than her emotions going out of wack. She's a great friend, I just love El too much to even think about anyone else like that.

As soon as I entered the house I saw Dustin heading for the kitchen, I scanned the rest of the room to make sure neither of the girls were there before I rushed into the kitchen and I pulled Dustin towards the stairs with me.

"Holy shit, Mike you scared me." He followed me down and I kept walking until I reached the laundry room (also Johnathan's dark room) and I shut the door leaving us in complete darkness. "This better be good because I was just about to dive face first into a sandwich."

I flipped the lights on illuminating both of us in red. Dustin stood across from me his arms crossed waiting for me to speak. "Something happened last night." I sighed and he didn't budge. "Can you keep this a secret until I figure out what to do?"

"What kind of secret is this about to be? Holy shit is this about the upside down?" Now he was interested.

I shook my head. "It's worse than that."

"Russians?"

"Oh god, no." I placed my hand over his mouth so he'd stop interrupting. "Last night Max kissed me."

He gave me a deadpanned look then pushed me off of him. "_That's_ worse than the upside down? I thought the world was in danger again only to find out that you couldn't keep it in your pants?"

"It wasn't like that! And she kissed me! It was an ambush!" He rolled his eyes and turned to leave. "Come on, I came to you because I knew I could talk to you."

"No, you came to me because you're usual confidant is El who would just be pissed with you and you couldn't tell Lucas because it's his ex-girlfriend so he would also be pissed. Then you couldn't talk to Max because she was the one who started this mess in the first place. _AND THEN_, you can't tell Will because his loyalty is now with El, leaving you with just _me_. Last resort."

"Not true-"

"Admit it, then I'll help you."

"Well, it's just you're the one with no emotional ties to the situation." I offered instead.

"Are you kidding me? I'd kick anyone's ass for El. _Hell_ I risked my _life_ for El... and for science."

"Alright! You're a last resort, now just be quiet so I can give you the full story and understand what kind of shit-show I've found myself in." And to my surprise instead of arguing further Dustin walked over to sit on top of the dryer and didn't say a word.

"Okay, well she was crying so I wanted to see what was wrong. She was upset because she overheard me saying something kinda mean that wasn't true and she internalized it and she thinks that everyone hates her now." I looked at him. "She told me about that day in the cafeteria when they laughed at you." His brows pulled together. "You had toilet paper on your shoe Dustin, they were laughing at the misfortune, not you."

"She should have said something!"

"And she realizes that _now_." I started pacing. "She told me more about Lucas and then she mentioned how she's just like Billy and she kept crying and I was trying to apologize for what she had overheard me saying I only said all that stuff because El was getting the wrong idea about mine and Max's friendship, and _then_ she jumped me." I put my hand to my forehead. "After I pushed her away she said to forget that it ever happened and then bolted."

"So, just forget that it ever happened."

"Easy for you to say, do you know what this could mean?"

"That you like making a bigger deal of things than they should be?"

"No, it means that Max might have feelings for me." 

"Alright slow down Casanova, you're not _that_ dreamy." He jumped down from the dryer. "I honestly don't think it meant anything, wrong place, wrong time and all that bullshit. Your threshold to tell El anything is getting smaller and smaller, just know the longer you wait to tell her something the worse it's going to be. But if it really meant nothing to either of you then don't say anything." He patted my shoulder. "I mean you're already messing up anyways."

"What do you mean?"

"You got a third person involved dumbass." He said without turning back and walking out the room.

***

Dinner that night was awkward, it was the first time I had seen Max in hours and I was preparing myself for a cold shoulder, or even awkward blushing or something. But she just sat in her usual spot across from me and continued on like normal. Seeing her really helped me make a final decision to not speak of it. I actually felt hopeful that when it came time for me to go home and start sophomore year that we'd go back to goofing around. And I had actually been able to spend my day with El and not even think about the kiss. It was just nothing.

But then she looked at me.

Joyce had been talking about someone that came into her work today and El had just reached under the table to hold my hand and I don't know why I looked in Max's general direction but she was already staring at me when I looked. I retracted my hand from El's with sudden guilt on her behalf, who was I kidding? I had to tell her.

El looked at me for a second in confusion and I tore my eyes away from Max's to smile at El then turned my attention to my plate and pretended to be invested in whatever it was that Joyce was talking about. El just settled for resting her hand on my thigh. And I felt bad, not about the kiss this time. It's been awhile since we've shared any sort of intimacy. It weird how you could miss a person even though they're sitting right beside you. 

With that resolve I reached out and grabbed her hand giving it a tight squeeze in a silent promise. I'd tell her. As soon as I can find the courage to do so. And as soon as I can talk to Max and warn her.

*** 

Dustin and I had been setting up a game of _Warlock_ when El came into the room and waved at us to get our attention. "Max is leaving early and she won't tell me why." She hissed at us and Dustin and I looked at each other mine was in a mock confusion and his was accusing.

"Oh uh," I scratched the back of my head. "Do you want me to talk to her?" I was hoping she'd just want to deal with it on her own just so I didn't have to talk to her, but I've never had good luck so why start now?

"Yeah, maybe she'll tell you." El grumbled plopping down on the couch and Dustin gingerly handed her a hand of cards and she looked at him in confusion.

"Alright, guess I'll go... Talk to her." I slowly walked to El's room softly knocking on the door hoping it'd go unheard but the door swung open and Max rolled her eyes.

"Oh, it's _you_." She turned back to packing her bag and I awkwardly stood in the doorway, I looked out into the hall to make sure El was thoroughly distracted with Dustin trying to teach her how to play Warlock, before I shut the door behind me.

"Is this about what happened?" I whispered.

She stopped packing to grimace at me. "No, not everything's about you Wheeler. And why are you whispering, the door's closed?" She turned to gather her makeup off of El's desk and I faltered. I hadn't even known she wore makeup. 

"Well then why are you leaving?"

She chucked her hair brush at her duffel bag and it hit it with a _puff_ sound before she turned to face me her hands on her hips and her breathing heavy. "Alright, it is because of what happened." She admitted. I was about to speak but she held her hand up. "But it's only because I know you're going to tell her." Her lip trembled. "And I wouldn't be able to be here and have her hate me too."

"How'd you know I'd say anything?"

"You're too nice for your own good, Wheeler." She sighed. "I knew that you would overthink yourself to death, then you'd squeal, then you'd grovel, and then you'd blame."

"I guess you know me pretty well." I said quietly.

"What are best friends for?" She offered and I sighed in relief. I walked towards her to give her an awkward one armed hug and she stepped into it, blinking in disbelief before pulling back and punching my arm lightly. "Just do me a favor and wait till I'm in Hawkins, tell her to call me and ask and I'll tell her everything." She looked at the ground. "I'm sorry, I really fucked things up."

"I would've managed something on my own, I was due for another disaster anyways." We both laughed and she pushed her hair behind her ear.

"Speaking of disasters, when you get back home I want to look more into Dustin's research." My brows pulled together and she had a far away look in her eyes. "If something else is happening with the upside down, and that _thing_ that killed Billy is still out there... I want to put an end it, for Billy, for El, for everyone."

"For sure." I said in slight excitement. 

***

"She wanted to spend time with her mom?" El asked in disbelief. After Max had finally appeared out of El's room with her bags, saying short goodbyes to Dustin, El and Will (she thoroughly avoiding saying by to me but I didn't take it to heart.) El and I had taken the chance to hang out alone in her room now that she didn't have the company.

"Yeah, she said something about how they had gotten in a fight before she left and that she wanted to go back to patch things up." I shrugged.

And with that El had a thoughtful look on her face. "That's good for her." She sunk further into my side, her head resting in the crook of my neck. "Can I tell you something?" She asked quietly.

"Hm?" 

She started picking at my Blue Angles Military shirt, the design was fading and the screen print was cracked. "Sometimes I get sick to my stomach with how everyone treats their parents." She admitted. "And I know that it's just normal to have arguments with them, but some people are just downright mean. Like Heather with her mom, or how Max acts disgusted anytime her mom asks her to go shopping or go out to eat." El's lip trembled. "I would give anything to be able to actually talk to my mom."

I was at a loss at what to say because I had two viable parents, who aren't engaged with my life whatsoever, but every time I'm around El more and more, she makes me check my privilege. I never needed for anything, any place that my parents were lacking (like emotional support) my friends always made up for. I had a cushy childhood, with the occasional bully. I thought about what in my life I have only shared with El, the list is small due to the fact that I barely have time to process my own demons by myself and she's already dealing with a lot, she doesn't need my baggage coming into the picture when we haven't even unpacked all of hers. She still has yet to really tell me about the days in the lab and what the main focus of her nightmares are.

I have yet to explain why my mother has a collection of wine corks in a giant vase, or why my father's sleeping place is the lazy-boy in the living room and the pile of sports equipment collecting dust in the garage. Nor the tally's etched into the wood frame of my bed. I have things I haven't told anyone ever in my life and it's not that I don't feel safe telling them to El. I just don't think she'd fully understand and I don't think I'm capable of the patience when it comes to explaining the incessant loneliness I felt before she came along. And since meeting El, the only devastation I've been through is losing her. I remember reading a book of sonnets (I only got into poetry because of El, back when she lived in the cabin I would always give her love notes and such, I was a committed, in love, romantic, sue me). I read something that I thought _I_ resonated with, because the only pain I truly experienced was thinking that she was gone forever. But now looking at El as she's holding back tears just from a small mention of the mother she never got the opportunity to have, the poem never resonated with _me_, but with El.

_ **Torment and misery ** _ _ **are velocious to make ** _ _ **dotage pertinent.** _

Because I guess that's what emotional turmoil does to you, it ages you.

_Pain ages you._

I held her closer to me but she pulled back to look at me as she sat up on her knees, she took my hand in hers, holding it like it was life or death. "Hopper once told me about black holes." She looked down at my hand as a tear rolled down her cheek. "He said that he's like a black hole, and that everything he cares for just gets sucked into it." She looked at me again. "But I think he was wrong, Mike." She pulled my hands to her lips and kissed it, before holding it to her cheek, I could feel her tears. "I'm the black hole." She took a shaky breath and I sat up too hugging her close.

"That's not true, El." 

"It is, everyone around me keeps getting hurt and now Dustin said that the upside down could be back?" 

"We don't know that-"

"But we didn't get rid of it the last time. You and I both know that it wont just go away on it's own. And last time it was after me, it was after me and everyone put their lives on the line and now Billy and Hopper are gone." She then looked angry. "And so is Barb, Bob and everyone else that was used to make that monster, it told me Mike, when I was in the void with Billy the Mind Flayer told me that everything has been for me, I opened the gate. I started this." She shook her head when I was about to speak. "I should've never made contact with the demo-gorgon. I should have closed connection when I first saw it. And now other's are going to get hurt too. It's unavoidable. Until I'm able to fully close the gate and somehow convince every stupid scientist to get rid of this idea in their head that the upside down could be used as a one up in their wars. I'm tired of fighting this battle. But if it's back, powers or not, I'm fighting. For Hop."

So now not only am I keeping an infidelity a secret from El, but I am also keeping Dustin's new discoveries a secret. Another thing to tell her when I stop being a coward. 

"I'm doing this for you too." She touched her forehead to mine. "Because I don't know what I'd do if the black hole got to you too."

"Stop saying that." I said quietly. "Don't think like that please." I kissed her cheek tenderly and poked her nose with my own. "You're never going to have to go through this alone. Never again." I kissed her jaw line. "I love you."

She leaned back to kiss me full on. She sighed and I did too on reflex. Her hands dropped mine and interlocked with my hair, mine went to their usual spot, caressing up and down her arms feeling her goosebumps rise. Her skin was soft and warm, I then went to her waist pulling her closer and she broke from the kiss with a gasp and I just preoccupied myself by giving her soft kisses on her shoulders, her cheek, her neck. She softly pushed my shoulder and I stopped resting my forehead on her shoulder. The silence was filled with our panting breaths. "Too much?" I asked quietly. Instead of answering she merely just pushed my shoulder again until I was laying down and then curled up beside me.

"I love you too."

•••

_**Torment and misery **_**_are velocious to make _****_dotage_** _**pertinent**_.

_ **Committing to peril redeems life** _

** _But failing exonerates time. But just as fulfilling._ **

_ **A.G.Ledesma** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised here's a spicy fresh chapter for y'all.   
Again, english isn't my first language so if u see any errors srry :)))  
POV might change after the next chapter, just a heads up, there's just parts of the plot that need to be through someone else's eyes rather than just Mikes (even though I really like writing his POV SO MUCH POTENTIAL AND SELF DEPRECATION >.<)   
If I can get my butt in gear over the weekend I MIGHT update Mondays as well because school isn't really in full swing yet, but I love college!!!!   
Alright I talked too much, see u maybe Monday, if not Friday for sure :)


	6. The Beautiful Ones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UPDATE FRIYAY!!! This is a long boi, 2K words over my usual limit but I didn't want to leave it at such a nail biting moment :)
> 
> At the end is a link for a When Doves Cry master post on tumblr, that's where I'll post what settings look like, outfits, pop culture references, etc.. 
> 
> I actually do a lot of research for this story, and I hope that transcends through my writing!!! :)
> 
> Enjoy!

My first month spent with El and the Byers went by quick, days spent going to work, actually acquiring a nice sum of money, walking with El to her practices, trying to keep Will company but I knew he'd rather be left alone. Nights spent holding El in my arms. Still being a coward. 

It was always just an afterthought now. I'd be watering the plants at work, _"Max kissed you, and you haven't said a word to your girlfriend." _The other night as I was brushing my teeth beside El and we were smiling at each other in the mirror, _"The one gate you've been dealing with for four years now might possibly be multiple gates, AND you're keeping it a secret from your girlfriend." _

It was always in the back of my head but it was getting easier to ignore. I was on my way back home. Dustin had stayed awhile longer because the dates for his internships were pushed back and since Steve was doing summer course work to catch up in college, Dustin didn't want to go back. But tonight is his last night, and I don't mean to be a jerk, but I'm kinda glad it is. 

It was hard enough for me to try to keep his shit a secret. But when that's all he wants to talk about it was getting hard to make up excuses to El. And there was only so much I could do when I was there, who knows what he's told her when I'm at work.

I was currently walking home from work, I came through the door and it was typical to see El in the living room either reading or watching TV and sometimes she would be out with a friend but she would always tell me beforehand or leave a note so I wouldn't worry. But when I came through she was no where to be seen, and I walked into the kitchen to find a note only to see nothing. Accept the back door to the pool was left open.

I walked out cautiously stepping out onto the screened in porch to see Dustin sitting on his knees looking into the pool very closely. I walked up behind him intending to scare him but when I got closer I saw what he was looking at.

At the bottom of the pool, looking almost lifeless was El, who was in her swim team suit and she had blacked out goggles. The only telling sign that she was alive was the bubbles rising to the surface, but she wasn't. "Dustin, what the hell?!" I took my shoes off and threw them to the side and ripped my watch off in the process and Dustin was yelling at me but I didn't have time to listen. I dove in after her and I grabbed her under her arms, struggling to hoist her up to the surface. She began to move on her own and we both broke to the surface with gasps, El took the goggles off in a rush and when she saw me she let out a sigh.

"Mike, you scared me." She panted throwing the goggles onto the concrete before lifting herself out and laying on her back kicking off the ankle weights she had on. She threw ear plugs out of her ears and just stared at the sky as she breathed heavily

"_I_ scared _you_? What the hell is going on?" I dragged myself out of the pool too and took my shirt off to ring it out. 

"Well, if you weren't so determined to be Buster Crabbe and waited for me to explain," Dustin began and I lobbed my wet shirt at him. "Hey! You'll get my notes wet!" At that I froze hoping it wasn't the composition book of the possible gates but sighed when it was a completely different one. He seemed to understand my reason for the look on relief on my face as he handed over the book to me. "Regenerating psychokinesis, a general study?" I flipped through it to see multiple cut outs from comic books and I rolled my eyes. "You're joking right?"

He took it back from me quickly and I let him before looking over at El. "So you're putting yourself in danger to get your powers back?" 

She sat up and glared at me. "I was _fine_."

"So what's the big theory here? Nearly kill her and hope for the best?" I turned to Dustin then and he was going through a bag.

"No, more like trick her brain into thinking she's in danger. And keep it up Mike, for the next experiment we have to piss her off." He pulled out a helmet of sorts, and then produced something that looked like a car battery.

"No, _hell_ no."

"You don't even know what this is." He scoffed.

"I'm not stupid Dustin, cut it out."

El was stood to her feet just then and brushed passed me harshly before heading into the house. "Great now she's mad at me. I won't let her drown herself or electrocute herself and suddenly _I'm_ the bad guy." I groaned and Dustin was packing his stuff back up and I withheld the urge to snap. "Keep this shit away from her. I told you to not bring this stuff up again, she's already stressed enough as is."

"When will you just butt out of her decisions? And when are you going to man up and tell her the truth?" He poked at my bare chest and I slapped his hand away. "See? Don't try to act all hard when you're still being a pansy. And if you would've asked, you would know that it's not me who put this thing into motion. She _asked_ for my help."

Ignoring him I walked back into the house and when I got to El's room she was in shorts and a tank top. She had her arms crossed across her chest, just waiting for me to test her.

"Just for _once_, El. For once will you listen to me when I say that I'm not doing these things because I want to control you. Alright? Is it fair that I don't want you to get hurt, or possibly die from something so stupid?" She still wasn't budging. "Alright then, you leave me no choice. Any experiment Dustin does on you, I will do it too." Her face faltered a bit. "So you can't get hurt without hurting me too." At that her arms dropped and she groaned.

"You're so annoying." It was the first time she's ever really said something like that to me. "I should just let you do it so you'll learn your lesson." She stepped towards me and looked me over before sighing. "You're lucky I love you so much." My heart stumbled, we've said _I love you_ a number of times to each other but it was just the way she had phrased it. "Now go change, you're dripping on my carpet."

***

The next day it came time for Dustin to leave. As he was unlocking his car I stood back. El was back inside helping Joyce with her homework as Joyce has been taking classes at the community college.

"So this is probably the last we're gonna see of each other for awhile." Dustin sighed and I rolled my eyes bringing him in for a hug.

"No, we have gates to close, Nimrod." I patted him on the back. "And actually Max wants to help you. I don't know if you'd want it from her, but she was really adamant about it before she left here."

"You mean after she kissed you then bolted?" He joked.

"Ha-ha." I deadpanned. "I'm serious though. And so is she, she's really determined to put an end to everything. She needs closure from the whole Billy thing." 

Dustin leaned back on his car, thinking about it for a bit before pushing off and opening his car door. He threw his duffel bag in the back seat bench before getting in. "Tell her that she can come by whenever." And with that he slammed his door, started his car and drove away.

***

Another two weeks had passed with me _still_ being a coward. I only had a week left so El and I were trying to spend as much time together as possible. 

It was on my last night there that I wanted to take her out on somewhat of a first official date. I had enough money saved up from my summer job that I could treat us both to an expensive dinner, I've been so frugal with what I spent most of the time, just for this night, that and the gift I had bought her. And it wasn't a guilt purchase either, of course the guilt has been eating me alive. But now that I had money saved up, enough to spend on her and at the same time put away for the future. _Our future_. I wanted to show her what I was feeling was way past a childhood crush, or summer romance, or fling. It was the real deal.

Plato once said that in Greek mythology humans were created with four legs, four arms, two faces and two hearts. Zeus split them in half to condemn them to a life on earth searching for their other half. 

At twelve years old I found the person my heart belongs to. How many people get to say that? 

I surprised her by showing up to her practice, she hadn't even known I was there towards the end, but she had taken to swimming quite well. She joked around with all the girls on the team seamlessly and she wore a black wrap around her leg to conceal the scar she had from the shadow monster.

It wasn't until the girls were done with practice that Jen had pointed out I was sitting in the bleachers. El wrapping the towel around her shoulders walked towards me trying to conceal a smile. "I didn't know you were here." She said timidly giving me a quick kiss.

"You told me that sometimes people come and watch." I shrugged. "And I thought you'd want to walk home together." I smiled and she smiled back but it seemed forced.

"Oh, yeah! Let me just go get my stuff and get changed. Wait for me outside of the school." She kissed me again before hurrying out.

I got sidetracked as I was walking out of the school from looking at all of the pictures and posters and trophies in the hallway. Their high school was probably the same size of Hawkins'. I was looking over the wrestling teams trophies when the gym doors opened and everyone was piling out. I saw Jen and Michelle again, Michelle walked past me with a wink and Jen kept her head down and I rolled my eyes at the whole exchange. 

"How are you Mikey? El hasn't brought you around at all." Michelle pouted and I looked over her head to see if I could see El. "She probably just wanted to keep you all to herself." She bit her lip and I blinked in disgust. 

"Well, you know how it is. I _am_ her boyfriend after all." I tried not be be hostile but Michelle just made it really damn easy. "Where is she anyways? Why didn't she come out with you guys?"

Michelle shrugged her shoulders and Jen lifted her head up just then, "S-she's talking to Aaron."

At that my lips went into a tight line. I had half the mind to go and find them myself, but the better part of my brain told me to just go outside and wait to see if she'd tell me anything herself. "Alright, well I'm gonna wait for her outside." I waved to the both of them and Michelle grabbed Jens arm to whisper in her ear, and that made me overthink my decision to not go after Aaron in that very moment.

It took El another five minutes to come out. She smiled cheerily at me as she greeted me and grabbed my arm. She was going to keep walking but I stood still making her stop in her place. "Hey, come on." She pulled at me and I looked towards the doors of the high school, just to see if Aaron would come out. He was probably just waiting for us to leave. I looked back at her and she just looked annoyed now. Not wanting to ruin my last night with her because of Aaron, I went along with her and once we were towards the end of the block a White Ford Falcon sped past us and I'm 100% certain that it was Aaron, and one look at El's pissed off face only confirmed that.

***

After I told El about the plans I made for the night she took her time getting ready and I was going to take a nap, that was until Will came into the house, slamming the door and breathing hard. I sat up on the couch and he dropped his bag from his shoulder and walked further into the living room to collapse into the chair.

"You okay?" He waved a hand at me dismissively, he gulped for air.

"These guys, they-" More air. "They were chasing me, I uh, I lost them about two blocks back." His head fell back in exhaustion. 

"Was it the same guys?"

He shook his head looking up at the ceiling. "Word got around I guess." He shrugged. "Jen somehow still wants to go out with me though." He laughed breathlessly, finding humor in such a messed up situation. "Everyone else wants nothing to do with me, but she just won't let up." He sighed.

"I'm sorry things got so bad Will."

"Yeah, me too." He kept his eyes shut.

"So you can run that fast?" I asked and he cracked one eye open to look at me to see if I were serious and he snorted.

"Mike, they were in a _car_. I was on _foot_." He put simply.

"You're starting to scare me." I laughed. "You're almost bionic or something..." I said quietly and he just went back to closing his eyes and I squinted at him in thought.

I hadn't known much about athletic sciences, but I did know that as kids Will had always been behind, last picked and uncoordinated. Was it really possible that with just a year of training for _tennis_ suddenly he'd be well off? And with how he'd been acting since I've been here, the cold shoulder, the sudden mood shifts, the isolation and the huge appetites. It could all just be chalked up to a moody teenager. But the Will I grew up with didn't prefer to be left alone. He was alone enough as is. So was I.

_Shit_.

I got up and went into the kitchen. I looked around for a phone and just as I had hoped there was one by the refrigerator.

I dialed up still looking towards the living room just to see if El or Will would come walking in.

"_Hello??" _The annoyed tone of Max came through the phone and I sighed.

"Max, it's Mike. I need you to do something for me."

"_Oh, __I'm__ great thanks for asking." _She said sarcastically.

"Just be quiet and write these down." I waited a second and heard rustling.

"_Okay, shoot."_

"Alright, mood shifts, isolation, athletic prime and massive appetite." I looked back into the living room, still no one. "There's a possibility that something more is going on with Will."

"_Yeah? He's got angst?"_

"Max, he got chased by some guys today and he out ran them by a long shot."

"_And?"_

_"_They we're in a car, he wasn't."

"_Oh... Holy shit."_

"Yeah, Holy shit. So just share that with Dustin and I'll just call El when I'm back home and ask for Intel. You are in contact with Dustin, right?"

"_Yeah, yeah. And thanks a lot by the way." _She growled through the phone.

"What'd I do?"

"_You told Dustin __about__ our kiss, who knew you __were__ such a blab."_

"Well, maybe don't jump me then leave with no real explanations." I sassed.

"_Whatever, __it's__ in the past. __I'm__ over it."_

"Then don't bring it up." It sounded like Max had hung up so I was about to put the phone up but she spoke up again.

"_Alright Big Bird, I'll see you tomorrow bright and early, __I'm__ going with Dustin to pick you up."_

"See ya."

And just as I put the phone back on the hook I heard El's door open just then. She was wearing a black pinafore skirt and an almost sheer blouse that had a bow at the neck. She was looking at Will with her arms crossed and her jaw taut. Something was bothering her, but as soon as I walked further into the room she gave me a small smile.

"Ready?" I asked her and she nodded, not speaking. When we stepped out the door she looked back at me in confusion. Jonathan's Ford sat in the driveway, rusted and dusted. After making a call last week he said I could use it. It was stored by the side of the house under a tarp and he had doubted it'd even work. But through the grace of God, some gas (actually a lot of gas and it was really expensive) and a tune up I was able to get it in working condition. Dustin may have been the first in our group to get a car, but what he doesn't know is that I was the first to get my license. Because out of all the times my dad decides to be a parent it's for the milestones in my life that lead to me becoming a _real_ man. And when I had asked him, _what good is a licence when I __don't__even__have__ a car_? His response was that I'd do what he did and get one on my own. But the thing is, back in 1955 the average cost of a new car wasn't even over two grand and Nancy told me that grandpa gave him his car because he had gotten a new one. My father really just liked giving me a hard time.

I walked her to the passenger side and opened her door and she just looked like she was trying to keep her anger present but the more stops I pulled the more it seemed to subside.

Once I was sitting in the driver's seat I looked at her sheepishly. "Let's hope this works again." And another miracle the car started up fine (fine enough it still sounded like shit). The radio turned on and Fleetwood Mac's _Dreams _came on. El looked away from me out the window. And with a shake of my head, I backed out of the drive way, reaching out for her hand. And she didn't pull away.

***

Chicken Basket wasn't the fanciest of places. But compared to what else this town had to offer (the residents don't even call it a town, they call it a village because of how small it is) This was the best option. The waiter sat us in a booth in the back corner by a huge window. The sun was setting and El was looking outside, still not saying a word to me.

"Can I just ask for one favor?" I said and she looked from the window with a questioning stare. "It's my last night and I know that something is bothering you, but can we just put everything aside for this dinner and then we can work it out when we get home?" It felt so natural to call it _home_. In all honesty at this point wherever she is, _is_ home. 

She tilted her head looking me over for a second more, her eyes bouncing back and forth between mine, like she couldn't decide which one to really stare at, and with a sigh she nodded her head. "Of course." She reached her hand out on the table and I took it graciously. "And we _will_ talk when we get back to the house." She squeezed my hand lightly. "But you're right. This is your last night, and you did all this for me." She looked away again. "It's really sweet."

Dinner went on without a hunch. We were back to talking and joking, I told her a story about how I had met Dustin and she was laughing so hard she gained the attention from others at the restaurant. She has a nice laugh that turns into snorts and she covers her mouth and tears spring to her eyes. I often wonder if she had ever even laughed like this when she was back in the lab. If it was all doom and gloom, or if there were moments where she was genuinely happy. I couldn't help but ask.

"Can I ask you about the lab?" Her giggles died down and she used a napkin to wipe at her eyes.

"What, why on earth are you talking about that?" She was still in a giggly mood and it could bubble up again any second.

"It's just something I wanna know about," I shrugged. "You had this whole past I know little about. Just curious." 

She rested her chin in the palm of her hand and smiled softly at me, her eyes lowering a tinge. "There's things I remember better than others," She started. "Mostly the bad." She admitted. "I don't really remember being little, like Holly. Only bits and pieces of it, I remember sitting in a room with blocks and a colorful carpet. I had a stuffed lion, I kept that up until I escaped. I don't remember any other faces, just Pa-" Her lips went into a tight line. "Just Brenner." She sighed. "He never laid a hand on me, and in his own twisted way I know he cared about me. But he still had the gull to put me through that." I blinked in shock from how she was speaking through this, that four years ago she didn't even know of the word _friend_ or _promise_ and now she's sitting across from me saying things like _twisted_ and _gull_. She's come such a long way and it's easy to forget when its overshadowed by the sass she possessed, she acclimated well. 

"The tests started when I was eight, that's when they shaved my head so the transmitters could come in contact with my head, my hair was more blonde than brown back then. A little before that I had lessons, they taught me the alphabet and numbers, a little reading and some nursery rhymes, but nothing really beyond that. The first test was the first time I met Brenner. They woke me up early in the morning, striped me down and put me in a hospital gown then shut me in a white room across from a window looking into the other room where the scientists were." El looked down at her plate and pushed her potatoes around. "They placed a coke can in front of me and told me if I could move it in anyway, I would be rewarded. If I couldn't I would be punished."

She placed her fork down and sat back in the booth, crossing her arms. "Of course I could move it, I remember at the time though it was one of the harder things I've done, it was the first time my nose had bled too. Very scary." She poked her tongue against her cheek, thinking about what else to tell me. "They tried to make me kill a cat." She sprung on me and I blinked.

"A cat?"

"A white fluffy one. I had only seen cats illustrated in the story books we had, it was my first time seeing one in person and they wanted me to kill it." She was looking at her plate, but not really looking at it, she was reliving the memory as if the cat were right there on the table between us. "Of course I didn't kill it. I don't think I could ever harm something that fluffy." She pouted and then bringing her lip back in she looked me in the eyes again. "So when I refused they carried me away." My heart dropped and I touched my shoe to hers in reassurance. "They took me to the Dark Room. That was the room where they'd leave me until I was all cried out, starving and shaken. Nothing but four brown walls, a tiled floor and a heavy metal door that locked on the outside." The waiter came around and topped off our drinks, we both smiled and thanked her, only to drop them and go back into the serious atmosphere.

"I wouldn't kill that innocent cat for them. So I killed them instead." She shrugged taking a drink. "I killed them before they could shut me in the room and that was the first time I had ever been held." She looked away, finally some semblance of emotion as her eyes had watered. "Brenner called me incredible and he held my face between his hands then carried me away." A lone tear fell down just as someone had pulled into the parking spot in front of our window, their headlights beaming onto us. She looked away from the brightness, and more tears had fallen. "It's just crazy how at one point I thought that's just how things were. I thought that that man, who would ask me to do these things that terrified me, actually loved me. I thought that that's what love was." She bit her lip, shaking her head as she wiped her tears away. "Can we go? We need to talk." She uttered and I nodded quickly patting my pockets for the keys, I had paid the bill thirty minutes ago already and I just hoped that the car is still in good standing. And another miracle, it was. And this time she had reached for my hand first.

***

By the time that we had arrived at the house, the lights were off, Joyce had probably went to bed and Will was probably also sleeping, or over at a friends. We walked up silently and I waited as she unlocked the door. Once she did she headed straight for her room and I followed right behind, and once we were there she had shut her door.

_She shut the door._

My nerves were a scattered mess, my palms had begun to sweat and I just sat on the edge of her bed as she placed her bag down on her dresser and turned to me with her arms crossed. The anger was back. She looked at me for what felt like minutes but it was no longer than seconds before she sighed. So I asked the first thing that had come to my mind that had been killing me all night.

"Why were you with Aaron today?" I asked, gauging her reaction which was just her getting more pissed.

"Excuse me?" 

"When I went to the school today and I was waiting for you, Jen and Michelle said you were talking with Aaron." She dropped her arms and rolled her eyes. "I'm just asking, honestly I'm not mad anymore."

"You're not mad? Mike, I can talk to whoever I want." She hissed.

"Then why lie about it?" I kept on.

"I never lied."

"You just didn't tell me the truth."

"Alright you want to know?" She snapped and I nodded my head. "He's been giving me rides after practice."

"So you didn't want me to know about that?"

"I didn't want anyone to know about it, I just didn't want to walk home after practices." She scoffed.

My brows pulled together as I looked away from her hard stare for the first time since she shut the door. "That's kinda messed up, El." I said quietly and she took a deep breath of air getting ready to lay into me. "He jumped Will, and you're just okay with that?" I said incredulously and her anger faltered before she shook her head at me she tried to speak but I spoke up again. "And I can tell that he likes you, so what you were just using him?"

"It wasn't like that! And it wasn't just me he gave rides to! He gave rides to loads of other people, alright? I don't have to explain any more of this to you because I have done nothing wrong." She snapped. "But you _lied_." She pointed her finger at me and my heart dropped.

I didn't know what to say because I don't know which lie she was talking about so I just kept my mouth shut as she heavily breathed waiting for me to speak. I hated making her mad. I hated arguing. I hated lying to her.

"Say something." She growled.

"What do you want me to say?" I said weakly.

She shook her head at me, throwing her hands up in frustration before slapping them back down on her legs. She paced in font of me before stopping on the other side of the room furthest away from me and she looked at me like she was in pain. "You kissed Max?"

She said it like she didn't fully believe it. It made me feel like shit that she had a sliver of hope that it wasn't true, and technically it wasn't. "She kissed me." I sighed. And she just nodded her head.

"And you weren't going to tell me." She didn't ask but I answered anyways.

"I was going to, I swear-"

"And when was that supposed to be? Huh? You leave _tomorrow_ _morning_, when were you going to tell me this?" When I didn't answer she just shook her head in disbelief. "I had to find out over the phone-"

"You listened in on my phone conversation?"

"It was an accident, but I'm glad I did. Because I would've never known otherwise." She seemed defeated. And in a panic I stood to walk over to her.

"I'm sorry, look I'll explain it all to you, you can even call Max, she'll tell you everything. I didn't kiss her, she kissed me!" I rambled reaching for her hands but she shook her head trying to push me away. My heart was beating rapidly, just watching everything fall apart and I tried to keep it together.

"Let go Mike!" She pushed me away and I caught myself before I could fall.

"Please, don't shut me out. We can work through this, just please, _please_ call Max." I pleaded with her going towards her again but keeping my hands to myself.

"You think I'm going to call her after you both lied to me? I don't trust you anymore Mike."

I huffed in frustration. "How about those times you betrayed my trust? Huh? You've spied on me, you listened in on my phone conversation, there's probably more things you've done that you haven't even told me!"

"This isn't about you!" She yelled back. "I'm done! Alright? I want a break!" She screamed, tears springing to her eyes and my shoulders dropped. 

"No, no, don't do this." I said softly reaching out to her but she flinched away. "El? C'mon, we can fix this-"

"I don't want to look at you right now. Go Mike." She said gravely holding back her cries.

But my heart kept my feet planted, I wanted nothing more than to get out of that room to heal these emotional wounds, but I stood there, trying to find another reason to stay. "I-I got you a gift, I got y-you this, see I got you this ring." With panicked hands and nimble fingers I fumbled to pull the velvet box out of my pocket, but she had snapped before I had even got the chance to.

"I said go away!" She cried out, in that same instance the lights in her room had flickered making me gasp but she just continued to cry. "Go, I can't talk to you right now." She sobbed, and still watching as the lights scintillated about, the unremitting sound of them being tampered with, I backed out of the room my back hitting the door as she threw herself down on the bed a sobbing mess and the flickers halted. And in fear I left.

She would never purposely use her powers to hurt me. I don't even think she could subconsciously hurt me but watching her emotions go rampant like that, and just the small inkling that they're still there had terrified me. She was hurting so bad that I had awoken her psychokinesis somehow?

I was still stood in the hallway in disbelief with bated breath when a light had shined in my eyes, I actually hadn't even realized I was crying until I blocked the light from my eyes. Through the cracks in my fingers I saw a tired looking Will who put down the flashlight and looked at me questioningly. I was going to speak but all that came out was a guttural sob and the next thing I know he was holding me up, stopping me from collapsing to the floor.

"Hey, what happened? Is it El? Is she okay?" He asked in a whispered panic and I shook my head rapidly trying to get out of his embrace but he was actually pretty strong.

"_I fucked up, I fucked up, holy shit I'm so fucking stupid_." I lamented to him, practically heaving and he held me still until I stopped trying to fight him off. "I lied to her, Will." I was a sniveling mess but he was patient with me.

"Lied about what?" He whispered back.

"So much, I lied about so much and she doesn't even know the whole truth, but it was enough." I buried my head in my hands. "She said she couldn't look at me, that she wanted a break."

It was quiet for a second as Will rubbed my shoulder comfortingly. "I came up because my lights started to flicker..." He said quietly and I instantly felt guilty. He had all of those Christmas lights still strung up and it had probably scared him half to death to see them start to flicker.

"It was her," I gulped. "I mean, it _was_ her but it was _my_ fault." I admitted.

"Do you think... Do you think her powers are back?"

I just shook my head. "I think I just broke her heart."

***

**When Doves Cry Master Post, so you can see my visions, fact check me, **

**and also you can follow me on tumblr for special updates! **

<https://japanese--buffalo.tumblr.com/post/187319041903/when-doves-cry-master-post-there-were-few-things>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for all the kudos and comments! I'm so happy you're all enjoying the story!
> 
> Again, sorry if there's any spelling/grammatical errors, English is not my first language.


	7. Take Me With U

Waking up the next morning was hard. After tossing and turning until three in the morning, reading until five, my alarm rang at seven. And I refused to over think the events of last night. I can fix it, I just needed some time. I groaned, as I put my shirt over my head. I had no time to fix things in person, and I just had to hope that the distance will be enough to help clear her mind.

Walking down the hall with my bag I could smell breakfast. Joyce was sitting at the island counter reading a text book, a notebook filled with writing to the side and Will was manning the stove. There was no sign of El in the dining room whatsoever and I doubt she'd be in the living room.

"Morning sweetheart, there's cereal, or I can cook you up some eggs, or pancakes?" Joyce asked as her attention didn't gravitate away from her book.

"Uh the cereal's fine." I set my bag down and Will was avoiding eye contact as he wordlessly handed me a bowl.

It was quiet and tense with everyone except Joyce, so I sat by her at the breakfast bar. Taking a peek at her notes, it was just stuff about economics. "What are you majoring in?"

Joyce looked up and shook her head, I could tell she was unsure of her decision. "Right now I'm just trying to get a general associates out of the way. I have never had the opportunity to do any of this stuff because I was pregnant with Johnathan by the time I had gotten out of high school, their dad and I were able to just get by from him working at the shop." She shrugged again.

My mom never went to college either. I'm pretty sure her and my dad are maybe nine years apart. She was always just a stay at home mom. I've never thought that she would've done something different if given the opportunity, but then again we've never talked about it. We don't talk about anything.

"Is there any field you'd be interested in?" I tried again, and she seemed even more hesitant to answer. 

Fiddling with her pen she quietly spoke. "Criminal justice?"

At that Will's movements in the kitchen halted. "What?" He turned to her, almost looking appalled.

"It was just a thought really, I might change my mind." She smiled uneasily at Will and he was about to say something, but I felt he was going to discourage her further so I interrupted him.

"That's really great! I hope-"

"Mom, there's no women in that field-"

"_Now_ there will be with her in it." I gave him a look and he looked at me a second longer before sighing and rubbing his mom's shoulder.

"Rooting for you mom." He said quietly and a smile broke out over her face.

"Thanks boys," She was about to go back to her book before she paused. "Where's El? She's usually out here before me." She looked to me and I debated if I should tell her anything. Ms. Byers probably gives out the best advice out of anyone in my life, so I faltered.

"She and I... We got in a fight last night." Instantly she had a look of sympathy on her face. "She said she wanted a break. I don't think she's coming out of her room until I leave." I sighed and Joyce _tsked_. 

"I'm sure you guys will figure things out soon." She smiled and Will laughed from behind me gaining our attention.

"She won't forgive him anytime soon." He had an amused look on his face as he took a swig of his water. "He kissed Max." He laughed again.

"Hey, who's side are you on anyways?" I muttered.

"Her's obviously." 

"And I didn't kiss her, she kissed _me_. All she needs to do is call Max and ask her for the truth."

At that Joyce sighed. "You kids have more going on than I did growing up." She got up grabbing her keys. "You wanna try saying goodbye? I'll be in the car." Joyce patted my shoulder and I nodded getting up to put my bowl in the sink.

Walking up to her door I turned the knob fully expecting it to be locked but it wasn't. Her room was picked up, she had probably gotten up to clean it this morning. And in her bed was a lumpy mountain beneath the blankets. I walked in further, taking a deep breath getting ready to speak but El peaked her head out from the corner of the blanket making the words die on my tongue. Her eyes were were red and puffy. And at the sight of me she hid her face again. The lumpy blanket mountain began to cry.

I sat on the corner of her bed and patted what I assumed was her leg. She threw the covers down again, sitting up she looked at me with a glare and a pout. She was mad at me but still wanted me to stay.

"You're the most frustrating person I've ever met." She croaked out. "And what you did wasn't right." She buried her face in her hands and I carefully wrapped an arm around her and this time she didn't push me away. "I just love you so much, that anything you do that could hurt me, hurts one-hundred times worse. And that scares me." I understood all to well. It's like we both got a hold of this all too soon, that it could all just fizzle out and die before it ever got the chance to burn bright. Like a supernova.

"When can I see you again?" She asked surprising me.

"I'll try to come down during labor day weekend, or maybe even be down here after thanksgiving. But it'd be really hard with school starting up again." I sighed. "Any chance you'd want to come down to see me?"

She shook her head in a silent no. "Yeah, didn't think so." It was quiet for few seconds more and I retracted my arm from around her and she looked at me in confusion. "So we're okay?" I asked.

"I still need a little time. I don't like how I feel like I can't trust you, and now you're about to go home to Max-"

"She's my friend, she's your friend too, El. It's not like that at all."

"Then prove it to me." She snapped and I was taken aback. "Prove that I don't have to be worried, then we will be okay." Sometimes I feel like she's so heavily influenced by the soap operas she's watched because of how dramatic she's being. It was an easy feat, but it still stung though.

"I meant it when I said you had nothing to worry about." I held onto her hand and she looked away from me. "The night she kissed me she was crying beforehand, because she overheard the things I said about her to you." She looked at me then in confusion.

"So she also overheard me being worried that you two were more than friends? And what? That just put the idea in her head to kiss you? To get even?" She was pissed again and I started to backtrack.

"N-No! It wasn't like that. C'mon El. You guys became such good friends, don't let one little mistake get in the way of that. I told you to call her and she'll just explain everything to you-"

"You keep saying that." She interrupted me letting go of my hand. "And you know what? If we were such good friends she would've stayed and told me in person. If it really didn't anything to her she would't have ran away." She concluded and I faltered for a second, not having thought about it. As soon as Max gave me the okay to tell El I hadn't thought about the situation since. 

El could tell that she was getting through to me and I just shook my head. "Joyce is waiting in the car for me." I reminded her that I had to leave in mere minutes and her shoulders slumped. "I love you, okay? And I'll try to visit as soon as I can." Her features softened significantly and she leaned forward to wrap her arms around my neck, giving me a hug that squeezed the air out of my lungs. And not really thinking we had both kissed each other on the lips she froze and pulled back to look at me, but in what I'd call a _'what the hell'_ gesture she kissed me again making my head spin.

"Come back as soon as you can." She muttered, and I gave her a look and she rolled her eyes at me, oddly one of my favorite things she has learned. "I love you too, dummy."

***

After a long bus ride back, as Max had said both she and Dustin were at the stop waiting for me. Dustin looked annoyed out of his mind and Max had looked smug as hell. Glad to see they're getting along.

We talked about small things, Dustin was talking about his mother, Max was telling me about some music she had stole and before I knew it Dustin had asked about the aftermath of everything with El.

"I wish you could've been there." I said quietly and Dustin turned down the radio. "Well, I didn't actually get the chance to tell her myself-"

"Mike, I promise you I didn't say anything to her." Dustin rushed to explain.

"No, I know you didn't and thanks. And also sorry for getting you to hide things from her in the first place. It was stupid of me to even think it'd go well."

"Yeah really stupid." Dustin laughed and I smacked him on the arm. Max was sat in the back seat, being unusually quiet as she listened.

"_Anyways_, she had listened in on mine and Max's phone call when I told you to write stuff about Will." 

"Oh, did you notice anything else about Will?"

"Dustin, would you shut up and let him finish?" Max threw a ball of paper from the back seat and Dustin swerved slightly on the road making me hit my head on the window. 

"Well, I took her out to dinner and she was pissed the whole time and I hadn't known why, I asked her to just drop whatever it was that she was mad about and just focus on us having a good time and it worked, until she wanted to go home." I put my head in my hands. "I was an idiot, I asked her why she's been around Aaron-"

"That kid that kicked Will's ass?" Max interrupted this time and I nodded.

"Yeah, but I shouldn't have, she wasn't doing anything wrong." I sighed. "So things kinda just snowballed from there and she said she wanted a break."

"She broke up with you again?" Dustin had pulled into his own drive way and I was going to ask him to just take me home, but there were things I still needed to hear from Dustin about the multiple gate fiasco.

"No, she just wanted a break. The time we have apart from now until labor day weekend should be enough for both of us to just work on trusting each other again." Max had carried my bag in for me and we all walked into Dustin's house, his mom was in the kitchen drinking coffee as their cat stood on top of the counter drinking out of it's own mug.

She tried to talk to us in that high pitched coddling voice of hers, but Dustin pushed us towards his room, sliding the door shut. "Are you done with your break up story."

"Not even close," I sat on the edge of his bed and he crossed his arms. "You're not going to believe what happened with El."

"Did she sock you in the face?"

"No, when she wanted me to leave her room I kinda panicked and was trying to console her but she yelled at me and the lights had started flickering-"

"Oh my god did she fling you across the room?" Max asked in disbelief and I shook my head rolling my eyes.

"You guys can't shut up for shit." I snapped and Dustin just laughed at me but Max was still waiting for me to finish. "That's it, the lights were flickering like crazy and I left just in case her powers were back. And this morning when we were saying goodbye she hadn't brought it up, I mean we were too busy talking about other things to really bring it up but it's progress right?"

Dustin stood there his hand under his chin, thinking really hard. "So her powers are connected to her emotional well being?"

"Something like that." I muttered. "How about the gates, anything new about that?" 

"Actually yes. Suzie called two nights ago, said that there was something happening pretty close by us, and she said it seemed too close to everything else we've read about that there's no way it's just a coincidence." He walked over to his desk to give me the notebook of locations again. "Flip to the last page."

I thumbed through, seeing that he had to have at least added eight more locations. "New York?"

"Yeah there's this new new's paper out, _The New York Observer,_ over this past month they've reported companies having blackouts, factories halting productions from machines going haywire only for the next day things to be back to normal as if it hadn't happened." 

"Do you think you can pinpoint an exact location?" I looked over the long list of occurrences. Dustin's too smart for his own good sometimes. He must lose sleep over this stuff sometimes.

"It's too erratic right now, it keeps bouncing between lower Manhattan and Queens."

"Well then we can cross out Staten Island, Brooklyn and the Bronx." I folded out his map to indeed confirm that there were much more locations circled than I've seen previously. "So there we can just start pinpointing it to the center of New York."

"It's still a lot of ground to cover." Max spoke.

"We can talk about this later," Before Dustin could make a remark I held my hand up to shut him up. "And I mean it, I just gotta get home to sort some things out first." Dustin looked doubtful and Max looked irritated.

"I can drive you." Dustin was reaching for his keys.

"I can walk it's just a couple blocks away." 

"I'll go with you." Max was already out of Dustin's room before I could tell her no. And so we began the awkward walk back to my house.

"Please don't make this weird, Big Bird." Max grabbed my arm stopping me.

Making things weird was like a second nature. It'd be harder for me to make things in my life normal for once. "Look, maybe we should just chill out for a bit? Maybe hang out next week?"

"Did El tell you to stay away from me?"

"Not exactly." I winced.

She pinched my arm and I hissed slapping her hand away. "Tell me what she said!" 

"Okay! Ow!?" She released me and crossed her arms waiting for me to say something and I threw my hands up. "She's pissed Max, I mean, what did you expect? You kissed me then dashed and she doesn't trust either of us now."

"So she's done with me?" She asked quietly and I sighed, my anger subsiding.

"Look, she's just upset with you because you didn't say anything to her. She refused to call you anytime I told her to. She just needs time to trust me again. But in the mean time, maybe we shouldn't hang out? And maybe you could try calling her, you know to patch things up?"

Max's shoulders slumped and we kept walking. "I can drop you off at your house, I just have to get my mom's keys."

"Thanks Wheeler."

***

By the time we had gotten to my house a couple of things were off to me. For one my moms car wasn't in the driveway. Her and Holly would usually be home by this time of day. But the thing that was really off was that my dad's car was in the driveway. 

Max followed me inside through the basement door. And I put my hand to my forehead, readying myself to go upstairs and talk to my dad. I always felt a little sick before I had to be alone with him and have to have some kind of man to man talk. And something just didn't feel right.

"Uh, stay down here, okay? I'm going to see what's up then I can take you." Max just shrugged plopping down on the couch, I took the stairs two at a time and heard the sound of keys jingling. 

Except it wasn't keys it was the sound of a dog collar and when I had gotten to the foyer of the living room a small beagle was sitting in the center of the living room scratching itself behind the ear. It stopped as soon as it saw me and just merely licked it's lips.

"Uh, Dad?" I called out and I heard him talking from the reading room. He was sat in one of the chairs, his glasses to the edge of his nose, newspaper spread between both hands. He wordlessly gestured for me to sit in the chair across from him. 

"What's with the dog?" 

My dad folded the newspaper with a sigh. He acts like every movement is a chore, talking with him is excruciating because it's like he's moving like a sloth.

"It's Holly's." He answered simply.

"You and mom got Holly a dog?" I asked in disbelief. I begged for a dog when I was younger but my dad always said no because he was allergic. 

"Your _mother_ got Holly a dog." He answered again. Jesus Christ am I going to have to beat the answers out of him? I couldn't even imagine Holly begging, or even asking to have a dog. She's always been kinda quiet around the house, I've been with mom to pick her up from school before and she seemed pretty out going then but as soon as she had gotten to the car she was back to being timid.

"So...Where's mom?"

He exhaled loudly again and I suppressed an eye roll. "The store." With that I had gotten up.

"Can I use your car to take Max home?" I wasn't getting anywhere with him and if I had attempted to poke him with questions some more he would have turned the tables on me and start asking questions about my future that I don't even have the answers to yet. Grunting he struggled with his pant pocket, tossing me the keys.

I ran downstairs to Max who had taken the opportunity to browse through the tapes I had. "You're not gonna find anything you don't already have. I do have some I got from Illinois though we can start exchanging when school starts up again." 

"So what, you're not gonna hang out alone with me until school starts? Really?" She stood across from me and I just threw my head back with a groan.

"Yes! Okay? Yes, because my relationship with El is at stake, and I'm going to be brutally honest with you when I say that she means more to me than anyone. Alright? Now how about that ride?" She glared for a second longer, not even flinching from my outburst. She's probably the one that makes me lose my cool the most. And one thing that's good about Max is that she doesn't take what people say out of frustration to heart. So instead of decking me across the face or giving me a putokeo, she just rolled her eyes and headed for the door.

As I was unlocking the car my mom had pulled up in the station wagon. I noticed immediately that something was off. I stopped what I was doing and I could sense Max's annoyance as she jiggled the handle, trying to get me to unlock it but she looked at my mom too.

My mother stepped out from the car, her hair down, undone, and when she turned to smile at me with a smile that hadn't reached her eyes I noticed that she hadn't even done her makeup at all. My mom was always one to fuss over appearances and she would never allow me to step foot out of the house with one wrinkle on my shirt, I don't know how many times she had complained about the rips in my jeans, even after I tell her that they're still good I would always find a brand new pair of jeans folded neatly in my drawers. Going out in public and not looking "presentable" was something she always instilled in us, hell she would dress up to go grocery shopping. 

"Hi Michael, Maxine, what time did you get back?" My mom greeted us and proceeded to unbuckle Holly from the back seat. Holly timidly waved at the both of us.

"Uh I got into town about an hour ago, I just got home though and I'm gonna take Max home then I'll be right back."

"Alright hun, when you get back you can tell me all about your trip." And with that she got the groceries from the back seat and walked in, she was wearing a blue blouse and white pants. Another red flag, my mom usually wore dresses and skirts. She only wore pants when working on the flowerbeds in the spring.

The slam of the screen door set me into motion again and I rushed to unlock the door. Max sat and quickly buckled and we both turned to each other at the same time. 

"That seemed a little weird." She remarked and I nodded my head wordlessly. "I don't think I've ever seen your mom without makeup." She continued in disbelief and I nodded again in agreement, going on auto pilot as I pulled out of the driveway and began driving towards Max's house.

My dad's behavior wasn't off putting it was actually normal, but the fact that he was home is what was messing me up. And then with my mom going grocery shopping in the middle of the day when she usually made trips in the morning, in no makeup and casual nonetheless. And then that dumb looking little beagle that hadn't even looked excited to see me. A dog... A present for Holly who's birthday wasn't until January.

"My mom bought Holly a dog, it's a little beagle." I spoke and Max looked at me in confusion before she laughed.

"I used to have a dog. It was a Maltese, my dad got it for me when he and my mom split up." She sighed. "I had to leave little Benji back in California."

She continued talking about the dog and I was only half listening still thinking, trying to connect everything, but with Max's retelling of how she had gotten her dog the dots were connected. I just didn't want to face what this could actually mean.

"You okay Wheeler?" Max placed her hand on my back and we rolled to a stop in front of her house. No one was there besides Billy's old Camaro in the driveway that sat under a tarp, Max had told me that even though the vehicle was totaled his dad refused to send it to the junkyard.

"I think," I leaned back, looking up at the upholstered ceiling of the car. "I think my parent's are having problems." I admitted and she retracted her hand.

"Don't tell me it's because of what I said about my dog?" When I didn't answer her she poked my chin. "I'm sure everything's fine, Wheeler."

I rolled my head to the side to look at her. "My parents don't hold hands anymore." I blurted. "When I was younger they would always sit together on the same couch and just hold hands and just be _together. _But now they're hardly in the same room and when they are my mother is always scoffing and rolling her eyes." I looked ahead just as Max's step father pulled into the driveway. He had gotten out and stood at the end of the driveway just looking at us and Max huffed in annoyance.

"I should go inside before he threatens you or something... but if you wanted to talk about this stuff with your parents you can with me, you know I'm pretty qualified to help out with this stuff." She offered and I nodded. She slammed the door running inside and her step dad was still stood there watching me, not wanting to stick around to see if he'd actually say anything to me. I started the drive back to whatever the hell was going on back at home.

And I just hoped Max was right and I wasn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is two days late, I had a lot going on.
> 
> I can see a lot of worry coming from you guys about the ships and what not, and I promise that I'm going to try to touch on all of them, BUT in a realistic away that matches with what's already cannon. I just want to get my version of what happens next before season four and I have some time right now considering the fact that production doesn't start until October.
> 
> Thanks for all the kudos and comments, I'm going to try to get my ass in gear for next friday's update!


	8. Let's Go Crazy

It had taken me a full week to get back to Dustin and he was pissed. Actually he had been the one to show up at my house. It was 4 in the afternoon, I was downstairs laying on the couch half reading, half trying not to fall asleep when he had busted through the back door making me fling the book at the wall.

"Mike you son of a bitch, now's really not the time to be incommunicado." He dropped two duffel bags on the ground with a _thud_. And I sat up to glare at him and he placed his hands on his hips in a challenging manner. And with the roll of my eyes I just slumped back into the couch. "Great, now that I have your attention we have unfinished business." He dragged the bags over to me and sat on the floor as he unzipped them, he had varying pieces of junk, more notebooks, that goddamn battery he tried to hook El up to and bags of chips. "Max should be here in about five minutes by the way."

He stood to spread the map out across the old DND table. This time it was doubled the amount of red circles I had seen from last time and my stomach plummeted at the sight. "No way."

"Yes way, when you went rouge I was dealing with this bullshit."

He had no idea the bullshit I was dealing with at home.

_"Michael, honey- Your dad and I, we just-"_

_"What your mom is trying to say Michael is that sometimes things just don't work out." _

_"Y-yes, your father and I still love each other very much we just needed to take some time to fix things, to work on ourselves. But... Apart" _

Dustin brought me back to the present by placing another map in my hand I looked at it to see it was a bigger map of New York, with more circles between Queens and Manhattan. "You're getting close." I murmured in awe making him smile and nod.

"Yeah, it's mostly Max though. She's been calling a lot to tell me about more leads, that's why she needs to get here faster because I think she's going to be the one to pinpoint where it's originating from in New York, _today_." He pulled out a red notebook that had Max's name scratched into it in capital letters.

"So what happens after we pinpoint it? What are we going to do?"

"Investigate obviously?" He scoffed.

"But how are we going to get to New York?" I kept on, Dustin is one of the smartest people I know but he had the tendency to get a little in over his head.

"Mike, We'll cross that bridge when we get to it." Just then Max came through the door it swung open and smacked into the table that used to be El's fort. She slammed it shut with her foot and huffing she threw her messenger bag down to the floor. 

Her hair was curled and pinned back, she wore a flowy light pink blouse and jean skirt that had pink flowers embroidered into it. She also had on Mary Jane's that were muddied and had grass clippings on them. She was obviously pissed about the getup.

"Not one word." She growled.

"Okay, well one thing," Dustin started a mischievous grin coming to his face. "Have you seen Max, Raggedy Ann?"

She charged towards him and shoved him to the ground from where he was standing but he just broke into breathless laughter from the floor. "God Max, your like a goddamn linebacker!"

I pulled my lips in to a tight line trying to hold in my laughter and when she looked to me I went stone faced. And she seemed satisfied with me not laughing digging into her bag she produced her own map, when she unfolded it, it shown a topographical map of New York which I hadn't even thought about. Her map had tons of little notes written along with her own circles mainly surrounding Manhattan.

"I think I got it." She said, and both Dustin and I were quick to surround the map. "You see, right here between Washington Square Park and SOHO has been the most activity." She grabbed her notebook from Dustin flipping to a paper that had her handwriting all over it. "West 4th subway powered down suddenly, 9th street station closed due to power outage." She flipped the page. "Countless lines about subways being down or closed off, multiple department stores losing hours worth of business, Dr. Martens, Guess, Bloomingdale."

"Well what do you think it is?" I asked and she pulled Dustin's map over her own she looked back and forth from the topographic one to Dustin's before making a resolute circle. She stepped back and both Dustin and I got a closer look to see that she had Circled New York University.

"It has to be NYU. It's the central point for everything happening around Manhattan, and I mean what other buildings has research and lab materials at their disposal?"

"Good theory." Dustin nodded and Max scoffed.

"_Good theory_? I just figured it out, give me some credit."

"Should we call somebody?" I asked. "Like the FBI or something?"

"Why would we call the FBI?"

"Because the last known people to have access to the gates were _Russian_." I emphasized.

Dustin shook his head. "No, because actually the last person who would've had access to the upside down would be the US Army, remember? They ceased all Russian militia and scientist in sight. So if anything it might be our territory that has it, and if _they_ know that _we_ know-"

"They'd silence us." Max said gravely.

"Well we'd still have to do something." I wasn't budging on this again. "I can call... Nancy! I'll call Nancy." I concluded but Dustin stopped me before I could get to the phone.

"Hey, genius. If it's our government, _our_ CIA, then that means they're well aware of our past involvement with this bullshit and they're probably still monitoring calls."

"Well what would be a better way to contact Nancy?" Max walked over to the couch to sit on the arm of it.

"Johnathan." I shrugged.

"Doesn't he go to NYU?" Dustin was pacing now. 

"No, he went to a community college a state away, Nancy told me he would save up to go this fall."

"Alright, well call Will and tell him to get his com, Johnathan should be home by now from what El told me." Reluctantly I listened to Max and went to the phone. Will and I still weren't able to get back to how things used to be, and maybe things are going to come around again. But I'd rather be back to being best friends with him sooner rather than later.

Dialing the Byer's home phone, it picked up on the third ring and I was met with Ms. Byers panicked questioning voice.

_"Hello?! Who is this?"_

"Ms. Byers, it's me Mike." I gave Dustin and Max questioning stares and they were equally confused, they could probably hear how panicked she was.

_"What's wrong is everything okay?"_

"Y-yeah, yeah! I was just calling to see if Will could get his com started up? We've been trying to reach him." I twisted the cord around my finger and I froze as I heard her sigh.

"Mike, now's not a good time-"

"Is it Will?"

"_Of course it's Will_." She sounded exhausted. "_He's been having these dreams-_"

"Not here," I whispered. "Just find the com, or ask Johnathan to find the com."

There was silence on the other end before I hear Joyce say another tired. "_Okay_."

I hung up the phone and immediately ran upstairs, I halted Dustin and Max before they could follow me and then I took the stairs two at a time, with my mom not here to tell me to not run through the house I booked it up another flight of stairs before stopping on the landing to catch my breath and I went into my room to find my com. I hadn't used it in about a year but I think it's in my dresser. Rushing into my room I accidentally knocked over my laundry hamper that has been piling up for the past week, kicking it to the side I opened my drawers and rummaged through them, and finally in the third one I found it and switched it on being met with a crackling sound.

I turned about to run downstairs back to Max and Dustin but jumped when Max was stood in the door way with her arms crossed. "Jeeze Wheeler, clean your room."

"It _was_ clean." 

We both heard the com make a transmitter noise and I tried changing it to a different channel but nothing was working. "Is it broken?"

"No, it can't be it must just be the connection." Moving past Max I ran back down the stairs and I was about to head to the basement but stopped short at the sight of Dustin rummaging through the fridge. "Hey!"

"I'm hungry!"

"No, not that. Your radio tower, is it still working?"

"Cerebro? It should be. I mean it's weather resistant, but not like indestructible." He found a charcuterie plate and cans of coke and set it on top of the counter.

"No time Dustin, we gotta go check if it's working."

Dustin already had his mouth full of cheese. "Alright, well I'm low on gas right now so we'd have to walk."

"No need, I got wheels." At that Max raised her brow at me.

"Since when, Big Bird?"

"Uh, my mom's just out of town visiting my Grandma and she left me the car just in case." I shrugged heading out the door and they followed, Dustin trailing behind holding the meat and cheese plate in his hand.

***

By the time we had gotten to the area where the road ended I debated in my head weather or not to just park the car and make us brave the steep hill, but the new reckless half of myself just decided to drive this shitty station wagon right on up the hill, Max sat wide eyed in the passenger seat holding onto the dash and her seat belt while Dustin groaned from the back seat, the movements upsetting his stomach.

"Holy shit! Mike!" Max smacked at my arm and I braked as soon as the car leveled out on the top of the hill.

"That's gonna be a bitch to drive back down." I laughed and they both looked at me like I was crazy. And maybe I was.

Max was still looking at me as if I had lost my mind and I refocused on what I had done, and why the hell was she so dressed up?

"You should wear pink more often." I simply said and she just blinked in confusion.

"Guys..." Dustin opened the door stumbling out and I went out to look at what he was looking at. Which was nothing.

Nothing was there, just a hill and the underwhelming view of Hawkins. Dustin sunk to his knees in disbelief grasping onto the grass and to my surprise Max came behind him and patted him on the shoulder.

"W-who, who the _hell_ took cerebro?"

"Government, it has to be the government." I said but Dustin shook his head, grabbing his hat he chucked it to the ground in frustration, before picking it back up and standing to his feet, huffing and puffing he went back to the car sitting up front this time.

"We gotta go, we gotta call Joyce and tell her to wait until we figure this shit out." He said, crossing his arms and sinking further into the seat. Sulking.

Max and I looked to each other with a shrug and got back into the car with him.

And I was right. Driving that station wagon downhill was a bitch.

***  
**E**

She rushed about the house, opening drawers and checking underneath the sofa cushion until she had finally just grabbed the radio that was sitting on top of the fireplace and opened it up to get it's batteries.

She hadn't even really noticed I was there. Or maybe she did and she didn't care. But I followed quietly behind as she ran back towards the kitchen and I peaked in to see that she had Will's talkie, placing the batteries in she switched it on and it crackled to life and I caught sound of a girls voice. "-_broken_?"

"What? I can't hear you kids, you're breaking up!" Joyce spoke loudly into the talkie, like the louder she spoke, who ever was on the other side would hear her. It had to have been Mike, or Dustin.

I leaned on the wall listening as Joyce sighed placing the talkie back on the counter. She was tapping her foot on the fake tile floor. Nervous? Impatient? I moved back out of sight. And just sat on the ledge in front of the fireplace.

Will hasn't been okay for awhile now. He actually stopped talking to me. And I was hoping that Mike hadn't been angry enough with me to tell him about the rides I had been getting with Aaron.

And I don't know if he'd understand. I didn't think it was wrong, everyone else was getting into Aaron's car. It made a twenty minute walk just an eight minute drive.

Of course when he first offered I wished nothing more than to have my powers back and do something others would think as horrid. But without my powers I've had to find other ways to deal with people. I've become a people.

With Will not talking to me anymore, and Aaron and the rest of the girls shutting me out I was just in my room or with Joyce most of the time. But since three nights ago I don't even have Joyce to be with anymore.

Somethings wrong. I know that. I'm just scared of what.

Almost an hour had gone by with Joyce fiddling with the com, trying multiple different batteries, blowing in it to see if dust had gotten in it, she mentioned wishing Bob were there to help her out which made me tear up a little bit. She was just about to result in tearing it apart when the shrill ring of the phone made her jump and she quickly got up to answer it again.

"Hello?! Yes?!" She stood listening for a second and she sighed. "Oh, I thought I was doing something wrong." She placed a hand on her forehead, looking tired. 

"Well, couldn't he just make another one? No? Well how was I supposed to know that?" She started pacing in the kitchen stretching the telephone wire to it's limit. "Well actually I got a message from him not too long ago. I think he moved bases, I'd have to call and check but he might be able to help. But in the mean time maybe talk to Clarke? He's been a big help in the past and maybe he could find a way to make one?" Joyce listened for a second longer saying a lot of "yeah's" and "alright's."

By the time she hung up I was a little tired from just listening in and she walked into the living room noticing me. "Oh, hey sweetie." She smiled, but she was clearly stressed. "Do you think you could do me a favor and go check on Will? I'm running late for work." She asked and I just nodded in response and she stepped forward to give me a kiss on my forehead, grabbing her keys out of the bowl on the mantle she sighed. "I'll try to get back as soon as I get off, just try to make sure that he eats something today?" I nodded again and she blew me another kiss before she headed out the door.

I sat for awhile thinking about whether or not I should call Mike to see what was going on, but part of me didn't even want to know. It had to be about the upside down. It had to be about it being back and I just can't face it now.

What would I be able to do about it? 

What do they think they'd be able to do about it without me?

Not knowing what to really do with myself, I just did what I was asked and went to the kitchen to make something for Will to eat. Cooking was something Johnathan started to teach me before he had left for school. He was really good at cooking. When I had lived with Hopper he had just taught me how to heat up our TV dinners or put eggo's in the toaster, people think it's weird that ate them frozen. And Joyce tried to teach me a couple things, but I found out fast that she wasn't very good at it, but she tried.

Taking a plate of just a bologna and cheese sandwich downstairs, I knocked on Will's door and when he hadn't answered, I went in. I haven't been in his room since he had moved down here in the fall, I helped him move all the heavy furniture down here, he had wanted to do it while his mom was at work so she wouldn't say no.

Walking in it was pitch dark. The dark never made me feel good so I flipped on the light, only for a bunch of colored lights to spark on, Christmas lights. The giant board on the wall with all the black drawings were hard to miss. It's just there staring at you as soon as you step into the room and with a quickly beating heart and my lungs feeling like they couldn't hold onto air quick enough I stepped forward to get a better look. 

The sight of the demo-gorgon standing upright as it's... mouth was opened made me feel cold all over. It was that and the sight of the shadow monster looming over a field, a man, Bob being ripped apart by demo-dogs. The images were just jumping out at me, like I was seeing what Will was seeing. I stepped closer to look at one that seemed to be pinned on top of all the others and I felt like my heart was in my throat.

It was a man shackled to a wall. The shadow of a demo-gorgon in front of him. My eyes watered with tears as I finally recognized it was Hopper. I turned quickly to Will's sleeping form in his bed. I placed his food on his bedside table and quickly shook him awake.

"Will?"

It took me while to get him to respond. He lightly waved me away but I kept shaking him awake and finally he seemed to realize it was me and his eyes sprung open. "El? What are you doing in here?" He sounded upset, and I could see why.

"I need you to tell me what you saw." I said simply and he looked at me in confusion and I pointed towards the board. "You drew Hopper, and everyone else. You saw something, tell me." I pleaded and he scooted back to sit up, and I stayed, kneeling by the side of his bed. 

"It was dream, he was in a room chained to a wall, he was sick and coughing and a gate type thing opened and... the demo-gorgon came in and I woke up. He didn't even flinch at the sight of it he just looked... defeated." I grabbed onto his hand and held it to my face as I began to cry even more.

"Will, I don't think it was a dream." I put my face down into his side. "Something back in Hawkins is happening again, but I don't know what because everyone is just trying to keep things from me because they don't want me to get hurt but they don't know that not knowing hurts even worse." I cried to him.

"Yeah, I know what you mean." He sighed. "Well if you're right that it wasn't a dream what do we do? I mean, you and I have been the only ones to have... projections like this."

I lifted my head and released his hand wiping at my face. "I can't do anything without my powers. " I sighed and he nodded. "And even if I called Mike and told him to tell me what's going on I just know he's just going to keep keeping these things from me! Even after our fight I know that he just wouldn't be able to help himself!" I groaned and he just kept nodding in agreement.

I sat on the end of his bed just trying to think, if Hopper is out there somewhere it's bad, obviously. And he's not able to come back because someone won't allow it. My insides were twisting with worry at this point it could be anyone who has taken him, the scientists, the Russians, the army.

My eyes wandered over Will's other board of pictures. I remember the one's he drew of me. I grimaced at the one of Aaron especially how it was next to the one of Mike. He drew leaves, and trees and flowers in great detail. He drew a butterfly and I felt myself freeze as I was met with a memory.

"_This butterfly, it isn't real. I've just convinced your mind it is. Think of it as a kind of magic._"

I looked to Will just then and he was waiting for me to speak. "I need you to cover for me." I said quickly.

"What? Why?"

"I- my sister, I think she can help." I stood and he grabbed onto my hand.

"Sister? Where are you going?" I was afraid that he would just completely shut me down on this idea, but if I had any chance in finding Hopper I'd do _anything_.

"Chicago. I'll be okay, I've been before but you just have to cover for me-"

"And tell mom what? School starts in two days El."

I had completely forgotten about school. "I'll try to be back before then?" I offered and his lips pulled into a tight line. "Listen, I'm going either way. I have to do this."

"I know." He said quietly. "Just be careful? And come back as soon as you can? Mom should be busy enough to not notice, but just in case, I really don't want her freaking out."

"I'll try." Was all I said. I stepped back to give him a hug goodbye. And then I went to my room to go back.

***

All I had was a backpack with two changes of clothes. I walked to the bank in town to pull out money. The thing with all this money that Hopper had left for me is that I could only take out a certain amount each month and there was even more in another bank that I won't have access to until I was an adult and when we sat with the lawyer men, they told me that I could use it for schooling. But with this account that I have access to now and the money I just pulled out for a round trip to Chicago and some extra cash just in case, I can't make anymore withdrawals until next month, it took awhile for me to fully understand it all, and Joyce was even hesitant giving me access to it so early on. What would she think now that I was using it to sneak out?

The bus ride was brief, we only lived a little more than half an hour away from Chicago and kids from my school often took trips out to the city. I wasn't sure exactly where I'd be looking but I was going to take my chances and go back to the abandoned warehouse they lived in last time.

One thing that Mike would always kinda freak out about was that I remembered directions really well. He said it must have been the powers, but what he doesn't know that one of the things carried out regularly in the Lab was memory tests. Brenner had told me that it was important that I remembered everything I saw or heard when I projected into the void so they could get a better understanding as to what I was seeing. Of course I could say everything in real time to them as well but at the time when I spoke it would break the connection.

Getting on a city bus and staying on until the buildings looked more worn down and the people got less healthy looking, I was getting a lot of stares. Even more so then when I was a thirteen year old girl.

"You lost little girl?" A gross looking man asked and I tightened my jaw leaning away from him.

"No." I said through my teeth and his eye brows raised in surprise and he leaned back.

"I was just asking." He muttered.

I looked away in disbelief. I haven't really been that rude to someone in awhile, at school I was so busy with just trying to learn and fit in that I kinda became what Nath calls "Plain Jane" if only they had known that I had enough meanness in me to make an older man shrink away in fear. That I had once had enough power in me to put a tear in the earth.

I knew the warehouse was close to the pier so as soon as I could see the water I pulled the cord and the bus came to a halt. I got off quickly and knew instantly where I needed to go. The sounds of birds chirping and kids laughing from the Navy Pier unsettled me. Mike had always promised that one day he'd take me to a carnival or a fair. I didn't really care for them but he seemed excited about it. I felt bad that I haven't contacted him in days. But at the same time he hasn't tried to contact me either. Maybe when I get back home I should call and let him know that just because I wanted a break and some distance doesn't mean I just want him to ignore me.

Walking up to the building, it looked different in the day time, still intimidating but I went in anyways. It still had colorful graffiti and had lots of places where rain water had gotten in. I could see light coming from the upstairs and I ascended as quietly as possible, the last time I would've been in this upstairs room was when Kali forced me to see Brenner. Something I don't think   
I could easily forget. 

I could hear a girl laughing and I peaked my head in to see a woman holding a baby in the air as they both were smiling in laughing with each other. Before I could take another step or make myself known something wrapped around my neck and arms, restraining me, something cold touching my neck.

"Who the hell are you?" It was a man, he had a knife to my neck. I was too scared to answer the woman turned around and clutched the baby to her chest looking horrified. He jolted me, putting pressure on the knife. "I said who the hell are you!"

"J-Jane." I closed my eyes tightly. "Eleven?" I gritted out and the pressure was gone. The guy grabbed at my shoulder and turned me around and I blinked in shock. The tall green Mohawk was a dead giveaway.

"Holy shit, Shirley?" Axel breathed out with a small laugh and I let my shoulders drop. "I didn't recognize you with your long hair and... doll clothes." He gestured towards me with the knife, the doll clothes he was referring to had been my frilly blouse and jeans. The girl stepped forward still clutching the babbling baby to her chest.

"So you're really back?" The sound of her voice was familiar and it wasn't until she reached a hand up to twist a strand of hair around her finger that I understood it was Dottie. She looked... healthy, _happy_.

"Dottie?" I still asked and a smile broke out over her face. 

"Yeah, kid." Axel sighed, walking over to put an arm around her and I connected the dots.

"You two are together?"

"Yeah, well after you left, things just weren't the same. The group kinda disbanded and I just kinda followed Axel, and it all happened so fast." Dottie smirked at him before placing a kiss on her baby's head. "And this is Daisy." She turned the baby towards me, bright and blue eyed, was just drooling and babbling without a care in the world. I hardly interacted with babies, Heather has a two year old little sister I've been around, but not an actual baby. She handed it to me not knowing I've never even held one before so little Daisy was placed awkwardly in my hands as Axel continued talking.

"We've only been here a week, we're staying here for a bit until I could get us something better, the shithole we were in before this just wasn't good for the baby. And we thought it'd be safe enough to come back." He wiped his knife on his shirt before folding it back up and putting it in his pocket. "So, miss Shirley Temple, what brings you back to the scene of the crime?" He looked towards me skeptically and I got a better hold on the baby as she started to fuss but Axel took her from me with ease and bounced her up and down. It was an odd sight to see, such a rough and grunge man bouncing a soft, pink skinned baby.

"A lot has happened." I sighed. "I'm looking for my sister, because I need help." Axel and Dottie both looked at each other and I felt my heart pick up pace.

"Last I heard kid she turned over a new leaf, her and Funshine kept in contact and they live in the city together." Axel shrugged and I sighed in relief.

"Could you tell me where?"

Dottie popped some gum into her mouth before using the gum wrapper and walking over to find a pen in the giant office desk nearby. "This isn't where she lives, because she doesn't give out her address, but this is where she worked." She handed me the wrapper with an address and I quickly placed it in my pocket. "And don't be going around there past dark, you're too young to be out on the streets like that." She scolded, it's like she was made to be a mother.

"Well I should probably get going then before it get's dark-"

"Hey, wait." Axel interrupted me and I stopped my retreat. "I put you in a choke hold, how come you didn't blast me across the room?" I was hoping he hadn't noticed. These two may be old acquaintances but I still don't know if they've changed their ways either.

"I could've flung you anytime I wanted." Was all I responded with and he held the baby closer giving me a look that let me know he didn't believe me. But not wanting to waste anymore time I hurried out of the building.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Mike is kinda losing his shit, Max is dressed up, Will isn't doing so hot, Joyce is stressed and El is wildin' out. 
> 
> Also changed POV in the story, it's gonna do that probably 2 other times, and I'm pretty sure it's all gonna be told through Mike, El and Will's, just easier to get the story rolling, it is kinda difficult to do scene changes and certain plot points, and I mean if this gets a little difficult or confusing I could always just switch over to script writing and just have dialogue and action :)
> 
> Thanks for all the comments on last chapter!


	9. How Come U Don't Call Me Anymore?

The sun was just setting by the time I was where Kali worked, the taxi driver that I gave the address to was more concerned with teaching me about _Bollywood_ and what not, and if I hadn't been so focused on trying to get to Kali I would've listened more. 

It was a restaurant called _Twin Anchors_, in the Old Town part of Chicago. As I walk in the place was packed, with big groups sat around tables, kids laughing and screaming, the bar tops filled with guys talking, amusing each other. I felt extremely out of place once a hostess came up to ask me: "how many?" As if it wasn't normal to come into this place alone.

"K-Kali? Is she here?" The hostess stopped grabbing for menus and looked at me in confusion. 

"The dishwasher?" I didn't know how to respond so I just nodded. And the girls' cheery attitude disappeared as she sighed and told me to follow her.

She took me through the restaurant, I had to move out of the way of people walking past or squeezing past chairs that were sticking too far out, she held open the kitchen door for me and it was just as busy in here as it was out there.

I noticed Funshine immediately, he was standing at a grill, his stocky and huge body taking up the most space in the grill galley. He could sense someone staring at he looked up to see me, only to do a double take and began to grin but the woman grabbed my attention. "The dish wash station is in the back, just don't screw around, alright?"

Once the lady was gone I turned back to talk to Funshine but I was lifted out of the air, he was hugging me. "Oh Jane!" He laughed. "I thought I'd never see you again!" He placed me back down and I couldn't help but laugh in disbelief. I just assumed they'd all hate me after I left them how I did. "You have to see Kali, come on." He grabbed my hand and I felt my heart pounding in my chest.

I hadn't seen or heard from her since I just up and left them, I could feel the devastation through the void when I had left her, but I ignored it for the sake of Mike. I only checked in on her once since our departure, but she had been asleep, the dark makeup gone from her eyes, her hair no longer teased and dyed. It was enough of a serene image that I knew I wouldn't have to worry any longer, and of course she was more than capable to take care of herself.

And then I was finally stood in front of her. Well actually behind her, her back was to me, she had on headphones that were connected to the Walkman on her hip. And Funshine's voice had enough base to make her aware of his presence. She took one of the headphone pads from off her ear and looked at Funshine from over her shoulder. "What?" She groused.

"There's someone here to see you miss Kali." He pointed towards me and she shut the water off before turning fully around, her eyes dilated at the sight of me, but unlike the others I had reunited with, she did not break into a smile.

"What are you doing here Jane?" She asked, grabbing a towel to dry her hands and when she was done she flipped it onto her shoulder.

"Something happened." I said quietly. "And I need your help to fix it."

She crossed her arms and looked at me for a couple of seconds longer and she turned back to the sink and I sighed, I should've realized the damage I had done when I left. But suddenly she flung a plate back, and I just barely dodged it as it hit a metal shelf then fell to the cement floor, shattering into a bunch of pieces. "Kali, no she's just a-" Funshine tried to step up to her but Kali turned again her eyes wild.

"How did this happen?" She hissed. I'm guessing she was referring to my powers being gone and I kinda shrunk back as a busboy noticed our altercation.

"Sister-" I uttered out and her face twitched. "_Kali_, not here, please?" 

I thought she was going to tell me no, but when her glare dissipated and she nodded a silent yes I sighed in relief. "Sit out front and wait until I come get you, you hear? Don't leave." I simply nodded and she turned back to the dishes, the busboy who noticed us earlier glared at me as he swept up the plate shards as I were the one who broke it.

"I'll see you after my shift Miss Jane." Funshine smiled at me and I smiled back as I made my way towards the restaurant. 

***

It had been about two hours before things had finally wrapped up and the waitresses and busboy were working to clean the table tops, and mop floors. Both Funshine and Kali came up front, Kali went to the bar to pour herself a cup of coffee in a to go cup, she was out of the apron she had been wearing in the back and was now wearing a long, black parka. Her gloves were finger-less, wrapped around her cup trying to borrow it's warmth. 

"Let's go." She said quietly, and she hadn't even waited for me to get out of the seat I was in but Funshine stayed back holding the door open for me and I smiled in thanks.

A chill went down my spine as I saw all the people who suddenly came out on the streets, either drunk, homeless, or drunk _and_ homeless. Having someone as big as Funshine walking beside me made me feel a lot better, Kali was still ahead of us, drinking from her cup and ignoring everyone around her. 

She took sharp turn down an alley way and I looked towards Funshine to confirm whether or not this is where we needed to go, but he started walking ahead of me, Kali stopped as Funshine reached up and grabbed a fire escape ladder. Kali threw her cup to the ground and wordlessly climbed up the ladder, stopping to push her hands up against a window, opening it. Funshine waited for me to go up next. I was really appreciative that he was here, I don't know if I could handle her cold shoulder by myself. 

Once I climbed through the window myself, Kali had turned on a couple of lamps, it was dusty and the decor was like an old lady lived here.

"This is temporary." Was all Kali said as she took her jacket off. "The woman, she only comes to this house in the summers." Funshine struggled through the window himself but once he was in he just sighed and walked past us into the hallway, the sound of the door shutting left me and Kali in silence.

"So you're in trouble again, and you come back to me again." She wasn't asking. "After that bullshit you told me about being sisters and being the part that's missing, _we belong together_." She mocked my voice at the end. "And you left for your police man." I sat on the pink old couch as she paced in front of me.

"What, was I right? Did he want to turn you back over to the lab coats? He betrayed your trust and now you're back here-"

"He died trying to protect me." I snapped. "O-or at least I thought he died." She stopped pacing and stood in front of me, crossing her arms. Always so guarded.

"And what about your powers? What the hell happened?"

"It's a long story really, it all happened last year." I shrugged.

Kali made a show of sitting down, wanting me to tell her the story anyways. I started with after I had left her, the gate I had closed. The shadow monster that wasn't gone. The summer that was filled with me being in disagreement with Mike. And Max my... best friend that had lost her brother to that monster. The Russians, their technology, Hopper, Hopper's death. And finally I told her about throughout all the monster fighting I was unable to use my powers anymore. And that Will had seen Hopper alive.

"So for a whole year you have been unable to use your powers?" 

"Well, last month, Mike and I had gotten into a fight and the lights flickered." She nodded, lost in thought.

"So you were angry with him?"

"You don't know the half of it." I muttered. "Probably the angriest I've ever been with him."

"Remember what I told you? You don't have to keep that anger inside you anymore, it inhibits your growth, it holds you back." She patted my hands sympathetically. And I was filled with serious doubt that me being angry has anything to do with my powers. And I wouldn't want to lose control around Mike.

"What about you?" I asked quietly. "Axel said you changed?"

"Axel." She muttered. "Haven't heard from him in a year, weird that he still keeps tabs on me." She shrugged. "What we were doing just wasn't working anymore." She sighed. "After you left, it's like the hole from your absence I've always felt, got _bigger_." She looked me in the eye again and I felt so guilty that I couldn't look away. "Revenge isn't so sweet when you feel like half a heart." She admitted. And I bit my lip looking away. I felt bad for leaving, but I wasn't sorry for saving my family. But I said it anyways.

"I'm sorry-"

"No, you did what you thought was right." She stopped me. "You saved your police man, and those kids you call your friends, you found yourself a place where you feel like home and I needed that push to do the same." 

"Y-you and Funshine?..." I didn't want to finish my question in case I was wrong and turns out I was.

"Oh, no, he's like my father. We've just been helping each other get back on track. We've both been working, trying to figure out what our next moves are." She but her chin on the palm of her hand. "I've actually been looking for my family. My _real_ family. And soon I'm going to try to get to London so I can reunite with them." I smiled in genuine happiness for her that she wanted to go home. But she shook her head at me before I could get the chance to ask her more questions about it.

"It would be impossible for me to travel without identification or a passport El." 

"If we find Hopper, he could help." I said quickly. "He helped me get a birth certificate and everything." She gave me a look that let me know that she doubted he would be able to do that.

"So you believe your police man is alive?" She had gotten up to go to the kitchen, and I could still see her through the kitchen's serving hatch. 

"Yeah, my brother-" I coughed. "I mean my friend, Will," I corrected, I became so used to calling him my brother in front of others it stuck. "He has a type of connection to the upside down. He saw him in a dream, which may have been just a vision."

"Upside down?"

"Another dimension, like ours." I put my head in my hands. "Kali, so much has happened since you fled the lab and I'm only beginning to think about how much better things would be if you had been through it all with me." 

She came back into the living room with a tray of coffee for both me and her, I've never liked coffee, when I had lived with Hopper he let me try it one time and laughed really hard when I made a face of disgust. "How do you know about this other dimension?"

"I was the one who opened it." I grabbed the cup to be polite. "The tests- the reason why Pa- The reason why _Brenner_ took me away had something to do with the Russians, they wanted me as a potential tool in their war. But the void that I go into, it's always been like a one way mirror, I can see everyone and anything, but they can't see me. This creature, the demo-gorgon is pretty much the only thing that can see me in the void, it's the only thing I've been able to actually tangibly touch in the void. When I made contact with it, I opened the gate between our dimensions." I took a sip and kept the grimace off my face.

She sat across from me also taking a drink, her pull was much longer than my tiny sip. She looked at me, deep in thought. I kept wracking my brain thinking that at one point she's going to have enough of me being back and have me go back home. But she surprised me when she sighed. "I would like to take this time to say I'm sorry, and that I forgive you." I set my drink down and she held hers close, grabbing a spoon and stirring it around, focusing on that as she continued talking. "Since you left, the biggest change that I underwent for bettering myself is accepting that I can't change the past. My childhood could've been much better, but it has made me appreciate everything that I have today, it made me value the freedom I have found." 

I knew what she meant. That each year that has passed since my escape I become more and more grateful for where I am now, the people I found. _Mike found me._

"But, I wasn't lying when I said that what we are able to do is a gift. One that shouldn't have been exploited." The clink of her spoon against her mug stopped. "There are others out there, you know?"

I felt my hairs stand on end. I looked down at my wrist and moved Hopper's blue band out of the way to see the slightly green 011 on it. "Why was I the one?" I asked quietly. I've always been aware that I was just the next, possibly the last prototype to come out of the lab.

Kali shrugged. "You had something they wanted. They didn't dub want I did as useful, they placed all the ones they didn't want on the back burner, and some they even placed in some kind of protection program because they didn't show any signs of having a gift."

"Kali... how do you know all of this?" I felt uneasy and she smiled.

"Well, since I know I can trust you again, and these people might be able to help much more than I could..." She seemed amused with how I gulped. "Rest." She patted my leg with a chuckle and my shoulders dropped.

"What? No, just tell me now." I felt the whine come out. Hopper always said he didn't like whining so I tried not to do it. But I was at my wits end.

"I promise, you'll see in the morning. There's some people I'd like for you to meet."

***

I woke up to the sound of whistling and the smell of bacon. In my hazy mind I told myself it was just Hopper trying to coax me out of bed in the morning but as I rolled over to get more sleep I was hit all over again with the devastation that it most certainly wasn't him. I sat up and looked to the kitchen hatch to see Funshine standing at the stove.

Kali was sitting in the recliner by me, lacing up her black boots. She looked at me then noticing I was awake. "Good, you're up." She stood to her feet and I sat up on the couch. "We gotta get going in like ten minutes."

I took a moment to stretch and Kali pointed me in the direction of the bathroom. I brought my bag with me, a small thing with just two changes of clothes and a tooth brush. Essentials. I clenched onto the sink as I saw there was a phone in here and remembered Will back at home, how I hadn't called or gave him any updates. I know he's probably freaking out, but I also know that the less he knows and has to lie about to his mom, the better.

So I called the only other number I could remember. 

The rings seemed to go on forever until finally someone picked up.

"_Hullo_?" It was a quiet little voice and I looked up at myself in the mirror in confusion.

"Holly? Is that you?"

_"Uhm, yes?"_

"It's Jane, I need you to get Mike. Can you do that for me?"

_"He's washing dishes right now. Today daddy was late picking me up, and Mrs. Larson, she- she told me not to worry but mommy has never been late picking me up, and Mike has to take me to school but I don't think he likes it very much, and his friend says bad words-"_

"What do you mean Mike takes you to school? Where's your mom."

_"She said she'll be back. That she has to help nana. I think my nana lives really far away though."_

"_Holly? What are you doing on the phone?!_" I could hear Mikes panicked voice through the receiver. _"Hello? I'm sorry about that-"_

"Mike, it's me, El." I said before he could hang up.

_"Oh! Hey! El!"_ He exclaimed and I bit my lip to fight the smile that wanted to break out. 

"I was just calling because I needed to let someone know that I'm okay." I said quietly and I heard his sharp intake of breath.

_"W-why would you need to do that? Are you okay?"_

"That's what I just said." I laughed, before leaning on the wall looking away from myself in the mirror. "I ran away to Chicago." I could hear him sputtering getting ready to lay into me but much to my surprise he took a deep breath.

_"Uh, any reason in particular?"_

"My sister is here, she might know how to help me."

_"Oh, Kali, right?"_ I hummed in response. _"J-just be careful-"_

"Mike-"

_"No, I'm not going to try to stop you, we both know you're just going to do whatever you want anyways, and it's cool El, you're okay. Just let me know if you need me to do anything and I'll do it. I'm here for you._" He said quietly and I gulped away the butterflies.

"Okay..." I sighed. "Just when you get the chance, could you call Noah and let him know I'm okay? Don't say much else, he'll only be more stressed." I turned the water on to let it warm up so I could wash my face.

"_I'll tell him... I miss you._" He added.

"Miss you too Mike." And I did.

"_I better get going, Holly's getting hungry_." He sounded tired. "_But seriously, call me if you need anything._"

"Alright, bye." And I hung up before he could draw it out any longer. Nice to know I still get flustered around him, and despite my cold shoulder, he still misses me.

***

Kali led me back by the pier, the first hideout of theirs where I found Axel was just around the corner but she kept walking towards the docks. Until finally we reached a green and white boat. It was run down and the name on the side said _Délámhach. _Kali climbed the boat with no hesitation, the huge body of water made me nervous. Distant flickers of a young Billy playing in the sand were intruding my thoughts when Kali offered her hand out to me.

As soon as we were on the boat the door to the cabin creaked opened revealing an older Asian woman, she was holding her hand up to block her eyes from the sun, and when she saw Kali she smiled a toothless smile. Instantly she held her hand out and Kali placed it within, the woman brought the hand to her cheek and sighed. 

"My dear, how are you?" She crooned. 

"Better now that I'm here." Kali quipped. "Destiny, I have someone for you to meet." Kali held her other hand out to me and replaced it in Destiny's hand.

"This is Jane." Kali spoke. And much to my surprise Destiny held my face up to her hand as well, pushing it against her soft, aged, cheek. 

"Jane." She whispered out. And it was only then I noticed her eyes were cloudy and grey. "You're strong. You're very strong. And you have a big heart despite being hurt. It'll shrink if you don't get help. And you're lover is stressed and misguided, please don't misunderstand." She spoke all of this out and I was confused and informed all at the same time.

"Jane, this is Destiny. Number 3." Kali whispered. And I looked at the woman's wrist that was gripping my hand and could see the faded green numbers _003_. "She has a gift like me and you, notice her eyes? She's blind, all the tests they did on her in the lab gradually made her lose her eyesight but she gained perception, she can see people's fate, she could see their destiny."

"And I renamed myself." The old woman laughed patting my hand. "You don't believe me despite having seen other gifts, despite having a gift of your own. It might be comatose right now but I could still feel it, just waiting to come out, it's building up Jane. It's going to implode if you don't get it together soon."

"I've been trying to, I just-"

"You don't believe in yourself." She barked. "You lost faith in a lot of people, including yourself. And what a waste!"

"Now hold on-" I gasped when she reached for my shirt, I was wearing one of Mike's shirts he gave me from awhile back, it was a black corduroy button up that he grew out of and I used it as an overcoat. She reached for the breast pocket and slipped Hoppers note out before I could stop her and I was livid. "Give it back!"

"He's alive." She uttered out pulling it an inch from my reach making me miss it completely and I stopped fighting in shock. "He's alive, but not for long. He's beginning to lose sight of why he's still holding on."

"You know that from his note alone?"

"It was of great significance to the both of you." She handed it back and I put it back in the pocket with ease, my guard was up at an all time high around her.

"It is." I said quietly. "He's dying though?"

The woman's face softened. "It'd take a lot to have him give up, dear. There's much more to discuss, come before Christian comes home and won't stop talking your ear off." She led me into the cabin and Kali trailed behind, there was a small sitting area next to a rusted kitchenette I took a seat with her at the small booth, Kali slid in beside me.

"So my powers, would you have any clue on how to bring them back?"

"Well, when I look at you all I see is strength. There's no bringing it back. It's already here." She smiled at me and I rolled my eyes looking at Kali in exasperation. 

"I don't mean to be rude, but can you stop talking in riddles? I have to get to Hop." I made a move to get out of the both but Kali didn't budge. "Let me out."

"No." She said simply. "You're being disrespectful. She's waited a long time to meet you. They all have." I kept waiting for her to move and reluctantly she moved out of the both and I scooted out, heading towards the door of the cabin. 

"If the others speak just like her then I don't want to hear it." I crossed my arms and Destiny began laughing just then the cabin door swung open again. A dark, little old man wearing an ascot hat, limped in carrying an empty crab trap. 

"Destiny, it's gone to shit again." The little man had a thick accent that I couldn't place.

"Christian. Language. We have guests." She said shortly and he threw the crab trap out the door, placed his hat on the small counter, brushed what little hairs he had back, wiped his hands on his pants then held it out for me to shake.

I shook it tentatively. Frantic people make me worry more. But he sighed and smiled at me. "The name be Christian Diaz."

"Jane." I said quietly and he smiled more.

"And hello again Miss Kali. We've missed your sweet charms around here." He said sarcastically and she flipped him off from the booth she was sitting at. "Now what seems to be the issue?"

He's Irish, I finally connected the dots from the time I was at the lab and tracking various people one of them had been an Irish man, it was before I was strong enough to broadcast over radio signals and I couldn't understand a single word the man was saying because his accent was much thicker than Christian's. 

I was punished that night.

"Well Jane here was just about to head out, she's an impatient one." Destiny remarked, almost mocking me, I looked back at her and she gave me a wink and I just slumped against the counter. I'm already here, so might as well learn what I can.

"I'm just in a bit of a hurry, someone's life is on the line." I looked towards Christian again and he didn't budge so much at the news. "I'm Eleven." I held my wrist out to him , moving Hopper's band out of the way. And he merely glanced at it before peeling his own sleeve back.

_002_

"I had hoped they stopped after Kali here." He said somberly now. "Sad to see after all these years those bastards never stopped ruining innocent lives." He looked away from our wrists drawing back to look me over. "But you're the last?"

"I hope." Was all I could say. "D-do you have a gift?"

"Nothing as prominent as what deary Destiny could do, or Kali." He smiled at me before reaching over in one of the drawers of the kitchenette, pulling a knife out he suddenly slit it along his forearm making me flinch and move away from him and he chuckled at my reaction.

"Why did you do that?" I panicked looking around for a rag to stop the bleeding and he kept laughing.

"Christian Gene Diaz, you cut that out right now, and warn the poor girl." Destiny chastised him and he waved her off.

"All is well little one." He winked, showing me his arm again and where there used to be a huge bleeding gash was now just a small red scratch. I blinked and even then the red scratch suddenly vanished replaced by un-scarred skin.

"He regenerates," Kali summarized. "Like a stupid lizard."

"T-that's cool." 

"It's alright." He shrugged. "And you?"

"I can move things, with my mind. Or at least I used to be able to." I shrugged. "I can pretty much manipulate anything with energy."

"I'm sure you were a real treat for Clauberg-"

"He's dead." Destiny spat making me jump. "Clauberg died before these two were born. It was his apprentices son that carried on this mess." 

"His name was Brenner, from Indiana." Kali offered and Christian nodded.

"Forgive me, I've been out of the loop for so long." He made a move to sit in the booth next to Destiny. 

"Well, I can tell you everything. I just have to be on my way right after. Because in all honesty I need all the help I can get." I sighed. "The result of all the testing we've been subjected to almost costed me a chance at a normal life. And it keeps interfering and I'm tired of it."

"It's a heavy cloud over us all, dear."

"Then we wadge war with them like they did for us." I suggested and they all shared a look among each other like I was insane. "How many others like us do you know? Where's One? Four through Seven? Nine and Ten?" I looked toward Kali and she pursed her lips. I can't tell if I were swaying her or aggravating her.

"I have some connections to more." She said timidly. Then she looked to Christian and Destiny who looked white with shock.

"O-one, One's dead." Christian Uttered out.

"So is Four. Five died ten years ago." Destiny concluded.

"They do their tests, they do their experiments then they throw us out no matter the consequences. Or worse off you escape not understanding the dangers you face or how long you've got to live because they never told you that they took parts of you that you never gave them permission to have in the first place." He slammed his hand on the table. "Miss Destiny lost her sight, One, my darling Samantha died at just the age of 27 from overexposure. Four became paralyzed. Five up and shot himself because he couldn't stand hearing other's thoughts." He then looked to me, the one fresh out of Hawkins lab, stupidly unaware of these problems. Things I didn't know were an issue. Internally I was panicking but it all made sense.

In school we read about women who would abuse cocaine when they were pregnant and when their babies were born they had defects that would effect them for the rest of their lives. Everyone was laughing and making fun, but it resonated a little too close to me. I read my mothers files, I read the extent and the background of the experiments performed on her. She had a journal that I wished more than ever that I could've kept. But it was all detailed telling of the use of hallucinogenics, psychedelics and isolation tanks to expand the inner workings of the human brain.

And I was a result of that. Brenner once told me that I was exactly what they were searching for with all their experiments. All it took was an oblivious lover of conspiracy and electroconvulsive homicide.

"You give us the time and the place and I'll be there sweetheart." Christian affirmed and my shoulders dropped with relief. 

"And I'd follow him to the ends of the earth. Count me in too." Destiny placed her hand over Christian's my heart warmed at the sight. Kali merely shrugged.

"Anything to help my sister." Her eyes softened as she said this and I sat in the booth with them as we delved deeper into the past of our shared trauma.

***

_She held her arms out for the crying infant as if longing to hold an ancient relic. It was a bloodied, crying baby covered in afterbirth and love._

"_Jane_."

_She called for it, for me. I couldn't move. I couldn't move and tell her that I'm right there. _

_The baby vanished. Her anguish was loud._

_"Come back, come back, come back, please." She kept repeating it, her features tight and pulled back as she wept. Her head picked up suddenly and I was no more than an inch away from her, all sounds stopped accept for an incessant beeping sound. Her eyes were dark and empty, any signs of emotion were completely gone now, in the blackness of her eyes I could see my own face reflecting back as well as a figure approaching behind me. I turned back only to be face to face with him._

_"It's spreading. You're not going to make it out of this one alive." He held onto my face very lightly and I could feel the tears pooling in my eyes. "I could have helped you, Eleven. With me you could have been something great." The pressure from his hands started to increase, the image of the man bounced back and forth from Papa to Billy. I could feel my eyes start to bulge from the build up of the pressure._

_"Papa, you're h-hurting me." I uttered out. It seemed useless._

_"You did this to yourself." Papa spoke with Billy's rough articulation._

_The beeping got louder and I was dropped to the floor in black shallow water._

_Mikes room. I was suddenly in Mikes room. His bed was there, his watch on his nightstand going off but he wasn't waking up._

_"Mike?" I struggled to stand up, and staggered forward to the side of his bed. "Mike." _

_"Mike!" I yelled and he sat up startled awake, looking around with a hazy stare._

_"Eleven?" He called out and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, more awake._

_"Shut up Wheeler. Go to sleep." A voice grumbled out and in confusion I walked around to the other side of his bed to see Max huddled up in a Care Bears sleeping bag on the floor, engulfed in a rather large t-shirt I' knew all to well didn't belong to her._

_"Sorry, I- I thought I heard El." He laid back down, his hand going over his eyes and I stood at the end of his bed. My shoulders sagging in disappointment._

_"It was probably just a dream."_

_"Y-you're right." He croaked out. His voice wavered and he put his other hand up as he started to cry. As Max got up to sit on the side of his bed he turned away from her and curled up and cried some more. It was a tired and achy cry._

_She reached out to pat his back. "Big bird," She sighed. "C'mon, please don't cry." Her lip trembled._

_"I'm sorry. Things have just been a little hard lately." _

_"You're gonna be okay. These things take time, you're gonna see El soon for labor day weekend. Your mom's coming back for Thanksgiving. Then Christmas you can go back down to El. Just hold onto that okay?" She tried to soothe him but he just shook his head._

_"I don't think I can do this for much longer." He admitted. This wasn't like him. I've never seen this side of him before. And I was suddenly hit with the realization that this was no longer a dream. I looked down at my feet in the shallow dark water, I was back in the void somehow._

_And when I looked back up, the scene of Mike curling in on himself as Max laid beside him to hold him started to dissipate. And this time I didn't fight to keep it around. _

*

I woke up to the room still being dark, we had talked for so long that it would've been too late to go anywhere. The booth we sat in turned into an extra bed that Kali and I shared. She was sound asleep and I was wide awake, I could feel the blood trickling around my nose and out of habit I wiped it with the sleeve of my sweater. 

Something was wrong. Both with that dream, and whatever was going on with Mike. My chest felt achy, my heart had a heaviness to it. I had to go back home. I had to go back to Hawkins.

Getting up soundlessly, I went through my bag to retrieve a pen and paper, I scribbled Mike's phone number down and an apology, she gave me her new number before this so I knew we'd still keep in contact. I just wish this isn't how I said goodbye, just like the last time. And with one last look on Kali's sleeping form, I quietly gathered my things, bundled myself up, armed myself with the kitchen knife that Christian had sliced himself with and I left into the dark dawn of Chicago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a bit of time, I kept going back and forth between writing this and doing school work! I added 2K words extra to make up for it!!! Season 4 Episode 1 was announced! Hopefully I have this done and out before any promo happens because I want to get my part 100% out before the Duffers run off and stomp on my vision lol. At the end I'll make a lil bingo page to see if any of my predictions of tidbits actually came true!!
> 
> Thanks for reading! Talk next update!


	10. Housequake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This took like 70+ days lol, school got rough and studying abroad is stressful and fun.

I opened my eyes to see the familiar etches on the bottom of the top bunk of my bed. I still felt tired but I didn't even have it in me to fall back asleep. I moved to get up only to then notice the pale arm wrapped around my waist.

_Max_.

It all suddenly came flooding back to me of the events from the night before. 

_"Michael, the dishes are starting to pile up."_

_"Michael, you're going to have to pick Holly up from school tomorrow, I got to stay late."_

_"Michael, get dinner started after school, I might be in late."_

_"Michael, make sure you take the dog out."_

_ **"Michael, can't you do anything right?"** _

_I felt my fist tighten, squeezing all the water out of the dish sponge as I dropped the glass I was washing back into the sink. With a huff I turned back to look at my expectant father, his hair wasn't gelled, his face wasn't shaved and his shirt wasn't tucked into his pants. All obvious signs that he too was running on empty these days, but that doesn't mean he should put me down for it too. Without much thought to it I flung the sponge at him and it hit his chest with a **flop** sound, the cream button down he was wearing was now wet in the chest area as the sponge was at his feet._

_It took me while to realize what I had done. It was a terrible habit that I've had since I was young to yell and lash out when things become too much, but it was usually my friends or my mom that got the bunt end of it. Never my father. _

_It all due part in his criticism for how I've done the favors he had asked me, I wash dishes but they just pile up again the next day. I take Holly to school, but I woke up late one morning and he had made a comment as to how it shouldn't happen again. I forgot to do dinner one night because I had been with Dustin and Max all day. I take that damn dog out four times a day and it still some how manages to piss in the house. _

_He laid into me tonight, after I had just gotten a phone call from El, I was beyond worried but she told me that she was okay, and fuck this trust thing because this shit is hard. Holly had been downstairs playing and I was still washing dishes, the neighbor's next door, an older couple, the wife had made our family a casserole of some type, because in this town word travels fast. I was going to throw it away out of spite, I didn't want her pity casserole. But it was easier than attempting to actually cook something for dinner. So as I washed dishes, the casserole was heating up in the oven._

_When my dad came home and I heard the sounds of him breathing out of his mouth, loosening his tie and placing his brief case by the door. He then came into the kitchen and stood by the steps._

_ **"Michael, can't you do anything right?"** _

_It broke the peaceful silence I was in, the silence where I forgot that everything was so fucked right now. The catalyst in this situation was that I didn't check the mail and sort the bills. Something I wasn't even aware that my mom had done. He began to list other things I fucked up. _

_After I threw the sponge I stood my ground for whatever it was to come but he didn't say anything. He's never had to really discipline us. Hell the man has never really had to talk to any of us. So I said something first._

_"I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing things that I shouldn't have to be doing, all my friends don't have to do the shit that I do, I don't even get to be a normal kid-"_

_"Normal?" My dad let out a hearty laugh. "Nothing about you has been normal Michael, you're not a normal kid, because if you were I wouldn't have to explain to all my co-workers why my son doesn't play any sports,"_

_ **A tally.** _

_"Or why we never go out to the city to watch the game,"_

_ **Another tally.** _

_"I can't even tell them that my son's not a fairy because his girlfriend has to protect her identity!"_

_ **Two more.** _

_"You're not normal, and I'd rather have you spending your time doing stuff that actually matters than running around town doing god knows what with that red headed hussy and that disrespectful, toothless, bozo." He snapped._

_My heart was beating incredibly fast. He picked the sponge up off the floor and tossed it back to me and I just let it hit my chest and fall to the floor again. "Now I'm going to go grocery shopping and when I get back I expect to see that table set and food ready to eat." I zoned out towards a tear in the linoleum. I could hear his retreating steps, the jingle of his keys and the shut of the front door._

_I felt my eyes stinging with tears and I finally snapped out of it and looked up._

_ **I look up when I'm about to cry.** _

_ **I look up and pray that I don't.** _

_I pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes composing myself before dropping them to my side, picking up the dish sponge I got back to work._

_I had skipped dinner and my father had nothing to say about it, I locked myself in the basement before he had gotten home, Holly was upstairs already eating, she placed two of her dolls at the table for company so I wasn't that worried. When he came home I heard him try to open the basement door and much to my relief once he found it locked he just walked away. _

_There was only so much I could do down here. There were some books I've already read, movies, I already watched, tapes I listened to hundreds of times. It was a drag. I wanted to leave but at the same time I just wanted to stay right here. _

_So I picked up the phone._

_"Hello, Hargove residence."_

_"Uh, hi, is Max in?"_

_"Oh, Maxine? Max!"_

_I waited for a couple seconds longer when finally I heard a sigh._

_"Dustin, look you can't keep calling every hour. My parents are starting to suspect that I'm dating again, they're excited to think that I'm not some loner or lezbo."_

_"Max, it's Mike." I uttered out._

_"Oh! Big Bird! I haven't heard from you in days." _

_She sounded excited and it made me feel better._

_"Do you think-" I felt the words getting caught as I got a bit choked up, the walls in my own home becoming a bit overwhelming. "D-do you think you can come over?" I uttered out._

_"Now?" When I didn't answer she sighed, "Of course, I'll get one of my friends to drop me off, okay? I'll be there soon, hang in there." _

_"Thanks." I felt relieved. "Bring something that will distract me please."_

_"Got it."_

_"Door's unlocked."_

_"Kay."_

_***_

_The cushions were out from the couch, sheets and blankets were pitched, a fort was made and we both sat inside leaning against the couch, couple of empty miller lites laying around us as we both struggled to neatly roll the brown paper._

_"Damn it, you'd think I'd get the hang of it after hanging out with potheads all the time." She laughed. I took it from her along with the book she was using as a table. "You wouldn't know how to do it."_

_"How hard could it be?" I groused and she rolled her eyes and let me do it._

_"You know Big Bird, if someone told me three years ago that you and I would be close friends, trying to figure out how to roll a blunt I would've laughed." She bumped into my arm and I pushed her back trying to concentrate._

_"Yeah, I never would've guessed this for myself either. My dad wanted to enroll me in catholic school. Imagine where I'd be now." I laughed_

_"Not here that's for sure." She leaned her head back on the couch._

_I bent my head down to lick the wrapping closed and I held it up for her to see and she gasped. "What the fuck big bird." She took it and looked at it closely. "You actually did it, who knew you had it in you." She laughed again making me laugh in turn, I fumbled with my pockets trying to get the lighter._

_"Do the honors." I handed it over to her and she took it quietly , I watched the the spark of the lighter, the sound of the flame flickering, her deep inhale. When she exhaled she began coughing and I grabbed it from her as she patted at her chest._

_"Sho-should we open the door?" She choked out._

_"No, my dad never steps foot down here." I said bluntly and her lips pressed together in a hard line, just watching as I took a hit myself, it burned and tasted like eating grass. My eyes watered as I passed it back._

_"You never told me what happened tonight." She said quietly. The smoke was filling our make shift tent, we had a lamp in here for some light, so it was cool to see as the orange glow of it began it get hazy._

_"It's nothing. Sorry if I freaked you out, I guess I still have issues with being alone." I excused and she leaned her head on my shoulder._

_"I think we all do." She sighed. "Nothing's worse than being at home and having to pass Billy's room." She passed back, "His dad goes in there sometimes. He just sits on his bed and stares at the ground. I do the same." She confessed. "I'll never excuse the things he's done. He was messed up. Trapped. I won't excuse him, but I forgive him." I noticed the lone tear fall down her cheek and she grabbed the blunt from my hand as I was still taking a drag and took two deep puffs. _

_"Yeah, it's hard acting like nothing happened. Not talking about it. We almost died and yet we're expected to just be fine and move on. And now something's happening again and we have be brought through the ringer again because no one else can know, and no one else knows what to do either."_

_"I only have two years of monster chasing under my belt." She joked._

_"We deserve medals. Or some kind of compensation." I plucked it back from her and she rolled her eyes. "No, I'm serious. Whatever this is, whatever is happening has to be the last time. We should construct a contract, or a case to bring in front of the CIA, an agreement that they stop any and all research and experiments that have anything to do with alternate dimensions. I wouldn't be able to handle it if anything were to happen to any of us again, especially El." I sighed._

_"How is she anyways?"_

_"Well, she called me for the first time since I left. She was in Chicago, trying to get help from... someone from her past. She's uh trying to get her powers back." Not everyone knew about Kali and I'm not sure if El wanted people to know._

_"Did she sound okay?"_

_"She said she misses me too." My eyes watered, and not from the smoke we were filling the tent with, although it was getting to me._

_"You don't know how sorry I am Big bird. It was a stupid lapse in judgment."_

_"We can't change the past." I shrugged, looking at her. I could tell she felt bad because she was crying. "I don't blame you. I'm not mad at you, I swear it." She looked away from me, clenching her eyes shut._

_"Yeah right." She sobbed out._

_"I'm serious." I grabbed her hand. "You've more than made up for it, look at you, you're here right now. When I needed someone the most, and I called you and you came and didn't even ask a single question as to why."_

_"If El were here you would've called her." She said and I shrugged._

_"Yes and no. Yes ,because she's good at distractions but no, because she doesn't know about divorced parents, and I feel like an ass anytime I complain about my parents to her." I snorted._

_"So? Are you gonna talk about it now?" She retracted her hand to take the blunt back from me. "Your mom has been gone for awhile, don't think I didn't notice. You show up late to school a lot-"_

_"You only know I show up late because you show up late too." I interrupted and she laughed._

_"Not the point Wheeler," She bumped my arm. "What's been going on?"_

_She gave me the blunt back, it was the last bit of it and I finished it off, throwing the end of it onto the glass plate we were ashing onto. _

_"You know, the usual. My mom left to Florida to live with my grandma because she needed space and time away from my dad. She left Holly behind because moving a kid around at a young age messes them up. Hawkins is all Holly's known, she likes it here and mom didn't want to ruin that for her. But Holly loves mom more than any of this. She left me here because I'm in high school and it was the only way she wouldn't have to worry about Holly as much. Nancy was supposed to come home to help out but I don't think she wants to step foot into this house again, not even for Holly." I sighed laying my head back on the couch, looking up at the ceiling of our little tent._

_"Since mom's been gone I've kinda been doing everything, the cooking, the cleaning, the laundry, drop off's pick-ups, bath time, bed time." I shrugged. "And today my dad wanted to let me know I was doing a shit job, then proceeded to tell me that-" I clenched my jaw as the waterworks appeared again. "He told me how I'm not normal."_

_"What do you mean?" She sat up to get a better look at me and I chuckled a bit._

_"Like how I'd rather sit inside playing video games, than being outside, how instead of sending me to sports camp as a child I went to science camps. That he can't convince people that I'm not gay." I pulled my legs to my chest and let my forehead rest on my knees. "I'm not normal." I cried._

_"Jeeze Mike." She patted my back. "What does Ted Wheeler know about normal? Ted Wheeler is an ignorant asshole who can't keep a wife and pushes his kids away." She pushed my head back to look at me. "Things are gonna get better."_

_"It's always been like this, the tallies-" I started but changed my mind and leaned my head back down._

_"The what?" She shook me a little._

_Reluctantly I picked my head back up, and with a sigh I stood up and held my hand out to her, the tent was destroyed and she flicked the lamp off before grabbing my hand and letting me pull her to her feet. I led the way up the stairs. _

_My dad was asleep as was Holly, the stove clock read 1:30AM. We kept going through the living room, the dog merely just staring at us from it's bed by the TV. We crept silently up the stairs and when we got to my room I flicked on the light. I pointed to my bed and she looked at me confused for a second. And I walked forward and laid down on the bottom bunk, patting the empty side next to me for her to lay on, and still giving me an incredulous look she crawled into my bed, jostling me a bit as she situated herself beside me._

_"Alright what am I looking at?" She cracked the silence and I pointed towards the bottom of the top bunk. How on the slats there were numerous lines etched into the board, there were four slats and 3 of them were completely filled with 5's while the fourth was almost done._

_"What- what were you counting?" She whispered._

_"How many times my dad wanted me to be normal." I answered back with a shrug._

_"That's not right Wheeler, he's not right."_

_"I know that, it just sucks to hear all the time."_

_I turned my head to look at her and began to realize how physically close we were in that moment and immediately I began to back pedal. "Shit, do I need to take you home?"_

_"Hell no, I can't go home at this time, besides I already told them I was spending the night at a friend's house."_

_"Do you want me to take you to a friend's house?"_

_She gave me a deadpanned look. "I have no other friend's."_

_"Okay, okay, you can stay here, just hold on." I sat up and walked out into the hall to open the linen closet, all my sleeping bags were downstairs from all the times I'd have all the boys over. The only one that she could use was Holly's old care bear one that she got for a girl scouts sleep over, she ended up calling my mom 20 minutes after dropping her off and never even used the damn thing._

_I stood outside my door and took a deep breath before entering in. She was just stood there looking at the only thing that resided on my dresser which was a picture of me and the boys at the science fair, everything else from a fit of rage had gotten swiped off. She looked to me and smiled and I smiled back to be polite but it wasn't genuine._

_"I got you this." I held the colorful sleeping bag out to her and she grabbed it and held it up to see what was on it._

_"You're shitting me, never took you as a fan." She dropped it down from her face only to laugh at my glare. "I kid, I kid, I know thunder cats were your shit."_

_"Not even close." I sat on the end of my bed as she rolled out the sleeping bag on the floor. I noticed she was wearing jeans and one of her tattered shirts. "Oh, did you want something to sleep in?"_

_"You still got your He-Man pajamas?" She cracked again and I threw a pillow at her. Before getting up and rummaging through my drawers, I threw her one of my shirts and a pair of baggy blue and white boxers I've never worn. They were one of the worst things to wear with pants but my mom had insisted on buying me multiple pairs._

_I grabbed some of my own clothes and headed to the bathroom to give her the privacy to change. _

_Standing in front of the mirror shirtless, I began to take note of the toll the stress was taking on me. Since puberty came and hit me like a bus I've always been able to kinda see my ribs, but now they were just a little more pronounced. I've been known to fluctuate, it scared the crap out of my mom and she would always try to make me bulk up at dinners and doctors had to explain to her that overfeeding me wasn't going to do anything since I had such a high metabolism. Seeing myself now was a little scary. Maybe skipping dinner wasn't the best idea._

_After finishing my routine up I went into the room to see it pitch dark, Max was already laying down in the sleeping bag. In silence I went to bed._

_But then I heard her voice._

_It was probably around seven in the morning that the sound of her voice broke through to me and the beeping of my watch as well._

_It was her panicked yelling tone, the kind of voice she used in the presence of the bad men, the demogorgon. I sprung up and there was no one._

_***_

"Max, wake up." I moved her arm from off of me and she groaned rolling over to her other side. "We're missing school."

"And?" She croaked out. "Not going anyways, leave me alone." She grabbed my comforter and put it over her head.

"Max, I don't think I dreamt of El last night." I confessed. "I would've remembered other parts of the dream if it were a dream, and she woke me up."Max threw the blankets down to look at me. "I've heard her like that before. When she was supposed to be hiding. In the void I heard her, sensed her."

"Do you think she tried to visit you?" Max sat up just then and I got up from the bed and pushed my hair out of my face as I began to pace. 

"If she did she's in trouble." I then looked at Max as she stood as well in my shirt and boxers and I dragged my hand down my face. "And so am I." I sighed. 

Just then the phone downstairs started to ring making both of us jump, and quickly I went down the stairs taking them two at a time.

"Hello?"

_"Mike! Mike!-"_

"Yeah, yeah, Dustin what is it?!"

_"Come quick, to my house!"_ He was panting.

"Are you gonna tell me why?" Max came down just then and looked confused.

_"Not here, not safe, just hurry alright?"_ The sound of the line going dead was all I was met with and I clipped the phone back and turned to Max.

"Dustin's freaking out about something. You wanna come or did you want a ride to your house." I offered.

"Oh, no way am I missing out on this, remember last time he called us panicked?'

"Yeah, he thought his cat was showing signs of rabies when it had just gotten into his mother's coconut cream pie?" I grabbed my keys.

"Exactly, can't miss out on that."

***

Driving up with one hand I sorted my hair out, hoping it didn't look like I just rolled out of bed. Max had changed into her jeans before we left but was still wearing my shirt which I was going to comment on but didn't bother because I didn't want to fight with her anymore, or embarrass her.

"Oh my god." She uttered when we pulled up.

The lights in Dustin's house were flickering, to anyone passing by it wouldn't be that noticeable because it was broad daylight, but it just looked all to familiar to me. I hit the breaks and put the car into park so quickly, I wasn't even thinking straight. There was just so many signs pointing to something being wrong with El. I didn't even knock on Dustin's door, I just wrenched the door open and busted in frantically scanning his living room only to hear the frequency commotion coming from his kitchen. It was in there I could see Dustin cornered as this machine flailed on the floor, it had four wires out of it that were making the noise.

"Mike! Mike! Hey!"

"Dustin what the hell?"

"I know! It looks bad! But I think I'm on to something!" He yelled over the noises.

"Turn it off!" Max came in just then holding her hands up to her ears, jumping back when the machine throttled our way.

"I can't grab it, it has live wires!" His voice squeaked from how much he was yelling.

"Are you shitting me?" I groaned looking around his kitchen before spotting yellow rubber gloves by the sink. I jumped over the contraption after putting the gloves on. I grabbed it by the base only to get struck in the cheek by one of the wires, I felt my body go limp as my eyes rolled to the back of my head.

"Shut it off, shut it off!" Max yelled as I heard shuffling all around me, I felt like my body was convulsing. The wires are probably still touching me. Then suddenly all the noises stopped and my body came to a halt and I began to feel control of my limbs again.

It probably took me five minutes to be able to open my eyes again. But when I opened them instead of being on Dustin's kitchen floor I was in his living room on his couch, which meant I was knocked out cold for much longer than I thought. In anger I sprung up, my head swam with nauseousness and I saw Max who was sitting on the floor beside me jump.

"Oh Wheeler thank god." She sighed.

"_Where_ _is_ _he_?" I spat.

"Bathroom, but listen before you try to get up and kick his ass which quite _frankly_ I don't think you could do electrocuted or not. It was a freak accident, just hear him out alright?" She stood to walk towards me and held her hand out to help me to my feet.

"When the hell did you become the voice of reason?"

"When everyone started being idiots." She hoisted me up and I felt nauseous again but I was good to stand on my own

Just then Dustin came out of the bathroom looking pale and sickly. "Oh thank fuck." He sighed at the sight of me and I rolled my eyes. "I thought you died Mike!"

"Yeah? Well I'm alive, now what the hell was that?"

"Well, it started as an electrocution machine, you know for El because I think pain is something that triggers her powers-"

"I swear to-"

"But- But! Listen Mike!" He held his hands up in defense and I stopped in my tracks trying not to get too upset, I felt dizzy so with a sigh I just sat back down on his couch. With me sitting down he put his hands down. "Alright, so anyways convulsive therapy is mainly used in mental institutions and the research behind it lacks any real benefits so I scrapped the project."

"The point Dustin, get to it quickly please." Max clapped her hands rushing him and he nodded quickly gulping.

"Well I wanted to do something I don't think that has been done before. Remember how the demogorgon and demodogs are all connected with their hive mind? Well I think somehow I could use the currents in electricity to control physical action. Like a puppeteer." 

I looked away from him as he started talking about the logistics of it. How could he only be in high school when he's always thinking light years ahead of everybody else?

"-The only issue so far is getting the correct power source for it." He shrugged.

"Wait, what was the power source for it this time? How did you guys turn it off?" I asked remembering that it was still live when I had passed out.

"You're gonna flip, but I just unplugged it." Max said nonchalantly and I put my hand up to my face to conceal my anger.

"Also, might as well let you see this now since you're already pissed off," Dustin sighed going into the bathroom really quickly before coming back to me with a hand-held mirror. I took it from him and held it up to see that my left cheek was huge, red and welted. 

"Aren't you just the gift that keeps on giving." I sighed putting the mirror down. "You're lucky my mom is-" I started to say but stopped the thought and Max scrambled to pick it back up for me.

"Yep your mom is not really observant." She said then quickly changed the subject. "How are you gonna test if that thing works or not?"

"Well first I have to find a dead subject to see what nerves move what in the brain, then I have to test it on a living subject to see what limitations it has on something with free will. Then test it on the demo-dog subject I have."

"You still have that thing?" It would be years old by now.

"Yeah, I had Steve take me to the dump to find an old freezer, I fixed that up and its in the cellar right now underneath a bunch of meats." He shrugged. "My mom hates going down there anyways so it's been safe down there.

"You're just one wrong step away from becoming a mad scientist." I remarked shaking my head at him and he smiled. "Just don't let that shit get out of control again, it nearly killed me." I slumped back into the couch feeling drained.

The doorbell rang and everyone looked at each other in confusion. It was in the middle of the afternoon, all of our parents were at work and any friends we had were at school, which was probably just getting out. Dustin picked up the mirror he had gave me brandishing it like a weapon and I rolled my eyes as he crept towards the door and looked out the peephole and once he did he dropped the mirror to the ground. "Holy shit." He breathed out quickly moving to open the door and both Max and I got up to see and I gasped at the sight.

El was stood there with a bag on her shoulder, tear stained cheeks and restless eyes. She walked through the door with no hesitation and dropped her bag on the floor before throwing her arms around me.

"Are you okay?" She pulled back to look me over frantically only to pause seeing the welt on my cheek, she reached up to touch it but stopped before she could and I was grateful because it hurt like a bitch. "What's this? What happened?" She questioned and I grabbed her hand shaking my head. 

"Dustin's experiment gone wrong." I kissed her hand and her eyes softened. "How about you? You didn't tell me you were coming?" She pulled her hands away to brush her hair behind her ears and she took a step back from me.

"I-I saw something, and I just felt like something was wrong." She shook her head. "And we can talk about that later, alright? But now there's some things I have to tell you guys." She looked at all of us, she didn't even react to Max being there which was a huge relief. "I called Lucas when I was at the bus stop and he said he'd be here."

"_Oh_ _great_." Max muttered.

Dustin looked down at his watch. "Yeah, school just got out 10 minutes ago he should be here any minute."

"We'll wait." I said and El nodded.

"Uh, I'm gonna head to the bathroom." Max coughed out.

"You better not leave." I accused her. Dustin's bathroom had a window that she could climb out of and she's the type of person that runs away from emotional conflict, hell she already had run when she kissed me.

"I'm not going to, you _ass_. Mind your business." She growled brushing past me.

It took Lucas another 10 minutes to get to us, he was sweating and carrying a gym bag on his shoulder that he threw down as he stepped through the threshold. He looked pissed to have been summoned so of course Max had to say something.

"Nice of you to show up." She remarked and Lucas didn't even react, he just ignored her.

"What's the news? Everything okay?" He asked El and she nodded her head.

"Well actually there's lots we need to discuss." She began pacing in front of us. "And I don't really know where to start but there's just something I wanted to get off of my chest before hand." She stopped and looked at me briefly before looking at the ground. "I've lost a lot of trust with you guys." She confessed. "We all fell out of touch and part of it was because of the distance and another part of it was just growing up and I understand." Her shoulders dropped. "And all I'm asking from here on out is the truth, because I know that you're all keeping something from someone in this group and all of you are keeping something from me, just as I am with you." She sighed. "Because friends don't lie."

It was like a slap in the face getting hit with the old mantra we used to say as kids. We had all fallen so out of touch with the past that we hadn't even realized how much it affected the future. "Yeah friends don't lie, you're right." I breathed out. Thinking as to how I would go about telling her about my parents later.

"Well now that that's out of the way, what did you want to say?" Lucas asked. He seemed rushed and everyone else took note of it to.

"Got somewhere better to be Sinclair?" Dustin cracked and Lucas shook his head.

"Just missing practice is all."

"Who the hell are you?" I found myself asking and my whole body tightened from the tension I caused but I just kept the word vomit coming. "Why the hell are you here if you don't even want to be in the first place?"

He went stiff as well but spoke calmly, again it took a lot for Lucas to snap. "I didn't say I didn't want to be here, she wanted the truth from here on out. Sports are something that are of value to me and not to you guys, I get it that you don't understand but at least give me some leeway." He looked at all of us. "Being a black kid in America, sports are the only way I can make my mark." He said gravely.

"I didn't think about that." I said quickly.

"Because you don't have to." He shrugged.

"No because you're good at everything. Not just sports. You can make your mark with anything." I told him honestly. The color of his skin was never a factor in our friendship, and I didn't want it to be a factor in how he lived his life but there are things that I will never understand or experience that Lucas does. He's strong in the face of adversity. He doesn't budge. Which I admired, but maybe that was all born from having to have thicker skin. 

"Anyways," El cleared her throat. "I'll just say it so you can go to practice." She gave him a small smile and he smiled back. 

"After Mike had left, Will had gotten progressively worse, if he wasn't sleeping the day away he was out all day just running or working out, he hardly ate, he was moody, he was sick but he just wouldn't stop training. Well I was bringing him some food and I saw the drawings on his wall." Dustin and I looked at each other. "I know you guys saw them, but there was a new one, it was of Hopper."

"Hopper's alive, but I don't know for how much longer. Now I know you guys know something and I need you to tell me everything because we may not have much time left from what Will had seen. It was dark and he was trapped in a cell shackled to a wall." Her eyes watered. "And I just have to do whatever I can as quickly as possible."

We all looked amongst each other and Max bumped Dustin on the shoulder and he got up and went to his room only to come back with the notebook, both his and Max's. "We think we know something, none of this is 100% certain but we'd like to think it is." He opened the two maps we had and spread them out across the floor and El scooted down from the couch to get a closer look and Max sat beside her.

"All the marks are where things happened like they did here. Appliances and phone lines going haywire, strange goop, there's even been reports of missing people the number isn't that significant to draw attention but it's enough for us to know that these aren't regular kidnappings." Max pointed. She then put the New York map on top. "This is the closest one to us, and the activity that's been happening there out numbers all the others by a long shot."

El ran her hand over it in amazement. "Sorry, about hiding all this." Dustin said quietly and El shook her head in protest.

"You guys didn't want to hurt me. I get it. All that matters now is that we gotta get down there as soon as possible. There's too many obvious signs." She sighed before standing to her feet. "This map made things a lot easier, I would like to leave within the next 48 hours-" Everyone in the room started speaking at once in a panic but I kept quiet. They were all freaking out about their schedules and how crazy it seemed to just pack up and go to New York without telling anyone. El looked at everyone apologetically. "I know we have school and other commitments so if you guys don't want to go, then don't but I'm leaving regardless if anyone is coming with or not."

"I'll go." I spoke quickly. "I have a car, I could drive." I offered. "My dad's gonna be pissed but he's already pissed so might as well just-" I gasped suddenly and everyone jumped. "I gotta pick up Holly." I looked around for my keys and Max grabbed them from the table tossed them to me. "El you wanna go with?" 

She shook her head. "I want to hear more about the map, could you pick me up later though?" I nodded my head and I was out the door in a rush.

***

By the time I pulled up to Holly's school the school yard was empty, the parking lot only had two cars and with a sigh I got out. 

The only light on in the building was from the office light and through the window I could see Holly sat in a chair, swinging her legs as her lip trembled and tears dribbled from her eyes. I opened the office lady sighed at me and I just kept walking towards Holly. "Hey bud, sorry something came up at school, but I'm here so lets get home. Okay?"

She nodded her head and harshly wiped her tears from her eyes grabbing my hand. "I hope this doesn't become a habit Michael." The office lady spoke up and again I just ignored her. 

"You're gonna go away again." I heard Holly's little voice from the back seat and I looked in my review mirror in confusion and she was back to crying her soundless little tears. "You fight with daddy or mommy then you go away."

With a sigh I pulled into the driveway of our house and I looked back at her. "I don't leave because of them, trust me Holls." I gave her a smile but she didn't smile back. "You're too smart for your own good." 

"You are leaving?" 

"Not because I want to, there's just-" I put my head back on the headrest. "There's some things that I have to take care of okay? So tomorrow if dad asks you where I went just tell him I'll be right back, okay?" She still didn't look at me, so turned towards her fully. "Jane's here, if you wanna see her?" She nodded her head quickly wiping away her tears. "Okay we gotta pick her up from Dustin's."

With Jane on her mind she began to tell me about her day, she's very well spoken for her age but she sometimes forgets to breath when she talks so she gets breathless. It's endearing and reminds me of how often I had been shushed as a child because I wouldn't shut up. So I let her talk all she wants. By the time I pull up to Dustin's the scene before me is Max and El sitting on the porch El was looking intently on the book and Max waved to me as I pulled up. They both got up and headed towards the car, El finally looked up from the notebook and noticing Holly in the backseat immediately sat in the back and Max took the passenger.

"Look, look!" As soon as El had her attention on Holly, Holly had stuck her fingers in the sides of her mouth to show El the teeth she had lost.

"Lucas is on the fence." Max sighed.

"Well you're not making it easy for him." I looked at her before looking back at the road. "If he's out for this fight, then that's his choice. But I think he's gonna pull though. He always has."

"For you he has." She muttered putting her head against the window.

***

After dropping Max off at her house and sitting through Holly's busy chatter with El on the ride back home, El just watched as I went about cleaning the house and starting on dinner.

It was when I was in the middle of putting the stove dinners in the oven that El spoke up.

"Where's your mom?"

My lips went into a tight line as I shut the oven door and turned to her, taking my mitt off and plopping it on the counter. "Florida, at my grandma's."

"Because?"

"Because she, just like me couldn't stand being around my father anymore." I huffed. "She said they needed separation and that it'd only be for a little while-" My shoulders sagged and I looked towards the ceiling away from her concerned stare. "but honestly I don't see her coming back."

"Mike, she has to." She stood and came towards me and I looked at her again as she put her hand to my cheek that wasn't swollen. "She loves you." She looked into both of my eyes and I blinked, overwhelmed I shook my head in defiance. "She loves you and Nancy and Holly more than anything, she loves this house and she's going to love that you took care of it while she was gone, she's gonna love that you looked after Holly and your father." I shook my head some more.

"You don't get it." She dropped her hand from my face. "She wouldn't have left in the first place if that were the case." I scoffed. "I mean, I can understand her leaving dad and me behind. I'm old, I've lost my charm." She frowned at that. "But Holly?" I asked incredulously. "The cutest thing I ever laid my eyes on, she's never done anything wrong to deserve something like this. And she's left in my care when all I'm going to do is let her down?"

El took a step back. "You're not going to let her down."

With a sigh I got down eye level to El. "I already have." I stood back up and pulled at her arm lightly and hugged her. "It seems like that's all I've been doing lately, letting my dad down, Holly, Max, Dustin and you." She hugged me back shaking her head in silent disagreement. "I don't want to let you down anymore."

"You won't if you just tell me the truth." She said quietly.

"Well, Max was here last night."

"I know, I saw." She sniffed. "And she was wearing your shirt."

"It wasn't like that-"

"I know." she said again. "I'm grateful you had someone there for you. I'm just sad that it couldn't be me."

We stood in each other's embrace in comfortable silence for a bit until she pulled back with a sigh. "I know you keep telling me that it's nothing more than friendship." She shushed me when I started to speak. "I trust you enough to know it's like that for _you_." She said pointedly. "So I understand that we're all friends, but I want you to respect that I'm not comfortable with the two of you being alone together. Not saying that it can't happen, just saying to consider my feelings." She shrugged stepping back. "I'm gonna find something to wear from Nancy's room, let me know when your dad's asleep so I can go to your room." She pecked my uninjured cheek before heading off up the stairs.


	11. 17 Days

"Hey when you get to a good stopping point, you mind calling your folks back so they're not clogging up my line? Thanks." Murray drawled swiveling side to side in his seat, sat at a desk that contained four different IBM's and piles of notes and papers and empty liquor bottles.

"There's no such thing as a stopping point but might as well." Nancy pushed back from her own, much neater, desk with a sigh.

With a flippant wave of his hand Murray went back to putting wired headphones on and returning the comm.

Nancy phoned her home number from memory, leaning against the shack wall for support and listened to the rings echo on and on.

No answer.

Since finishing her associates in Journalism early Nancy had tried to apply to many different local papers outside of Hawkins coming up empty handed despite her portfolio of flawless pieces. It was when she was at her wits end she ran into the intrusive, cynical man that sparked her interest in journalism in the first place.

It was unexpected even to her but everything had just clicked for her at the sight of him. It had always been in the back of her mind, but seeing him was the sign she needed to put her thoughts into words.

Nancy had ran into Murray at a gas station outside of Hawkins. She had just driven from Johnathan's college and was getting ready to go back home because her mom insisted it was important she visited for the summer. He was arguing with the clerk about the price of jerky only to get threatened to be kicked out. Deciding to leave himself as he turned around and saw her, rather than the usual smile a person would give from seeing a familiar face he merely just rolled his eyes at her and pushed through the door.

"Murray? I didn't know you were still around here?" She followed him out to his car which was an old military grade jeep commando.

"Well Nancy Wheeler not for long because I was just leaving." He said to her in a falsely sweet voice. He was trying to hastily open his car before he paused staring at her. "Unless..."

She raised her brow at him.

"That article you wrote for Holland girl was adequate." He murmured stroking his beard in thought.

"I just got my associates for journalism." Nancy said crossing her arms waiting for him to say what he needed that pertained to her writing.

"I'm needing help writing an article that would... how do I say this... put a stop to the governments stalking bullshit and useless murders."

"A letter to the press?"

"An exposè." He said mischievously.

And that's how she ended up in a renovated barn in the middle of nowhere with no one but Murray to keep her company. Him and _Steve_. 

  
***

NANCY

  
"Hey, um, would it kill you guys to wash a dish after using it? Huh? Nancy Wheeler had I known you were such a slob I would've reconsidered a future with you back in the day." He flung a dish towel over his shoulder and placed his hands on his hips.

"They're not answering." I mumbled, redialing the number.

"What, what do you mean?" He walked closer and I huffed at the dial tone going blank. "They were pretty much calling everyday last week."

"I know." I felt off. "I wanna take a walk, I need to restart my brain."

"How far you going?" Steve followed me to the front door with concern.

"Not far, maybe down to the other end of the field and back." I shrugged. 

"At least take this." He reached to the side of the front door and produced his nail bat. It sent a pang through my heart to see it, it was mine but he used it to protect me and the kids. 

"Alright, Steve." I grabbed it with a sigh, keeping it at my feet careful to not let the nails touch my shins. I quirked my brow. "You're lucky we don't have neighbors." With a laugh and a nod he shut the door behind me, but didn't lock it. Which Murray demanded we do each time.

I shook my head with a smile knowing that Steve would never lock the door with me on the other side.

Living with Steve had been a weird development that occurred over the summer. I was supposed to be going back home when I ran into Murray. And when I ran into Steve he had actually been driving towards the interstate, I had just been getting into my car from the grocery store to get things that Murray and I had needed when we both made eye contact with each other. He immediately pulled into the parking lot and rushed out of his car to say hi. It was probably the longest time we've been apart. I hadn't seen him for a whole year and a half and I honestly wondered if he even still lived in Hawkins.

"Hey Nance." He said it like the last time we saw each other wasn't in a florescent lit room being inspected top to bottom and interrogated all at once. Like we both didn't have death sentences over our heads.

It was like a breath of fresh air.

"Where were you heading?" I asked keeping with the small talk but his smile dropped. He laughed but it didn't reach his eyes as he leaned back against my car to look at his own and I saw it was packed to the brim.

"I was actually heading down to Missouri." He looked down at his shoes, almost like he was embarrassed.

"What's down there?" I poked at his side, trying to let him know that whatever it was I wouldn't look at him differently.

"A military base." He said then he looked back up at his car with a shrug. "My military base, I joined the army." He said.

Of course I didn't believe it. "Steve, what-"

"I've been trying out here Nance. I've been working at the movie gallery full time, taking some classes at the community college, I moved out of my parents place and got an apartment with Robin, but just the other month Cindy Davidson walked in, rock on her finger and belly swollen out to here." He gestured with his hands to show a pregnant belly. "Or Brock Crawford driving up in a brand new shiny Cadillac, this guy who I used to _trip_ in the hallways offering _me_ a business card saying that he has positions open for _reception_." He put his hands over his face. "Nancy it was like a slap in the face each day, seeing the people I knew from high school walking into that movie store looking down on _me_."

"But Steve... The Army?" I pulled his hand down from his face and he sighed.

"It sounds like a good opportunity-"

"A good opportunity to get yourself killed? Do you have any idea what's going on over in Libya? The USSR?"

"Of course I do Nancy, I'm an American not an idiot."

"Could've had me fooled." I crossed my arms and leaned on my car too, and Steve looked in the back seat of my car.

"Groceries for you and Johnathan?" He made a disgusted face. "Jesus his diet is fish sticks and vodka?"

"No, he's still back in Philadelphia, he's gonna make the move to New York in a couple months."

"Oh? Are you guys still together?" He looked genuinely concerned which made me feel guilty. I'm glad Steve doesn't hold grudges. 

"No we're... figuring things out." I sighed. "It was a weird system we had going on over there. He would be at work during the day and take classes at night and I would take classes during the day and be at work at night. We only really had Sundays but even then we were real busy. And now that he's going to NYU and I'm trying to write-" I stopped myself, realizing that Steve might not be the one to tell about my expose on Hawkins and the government with which he was willing to _die_ for. "The fish sticks and Vodka are for Murray." I changed subjects and he didn't seem to notice.

"The Hermit lives?" He joked making me snort. "I haven't heard you snort in three years Nancy Wheeler." he said with an amused smile and I pushed his arm.

"Yeah, it's a long story but we're pals now." I shrugged, even saying it didn't feel right and when I looked at Steve I could tell he didn't believe me. 

"Pals?"

"Yeah, we talk. We hang out. We laugh." I internally cringe thinking about how it's mainly Murray laughing _at_ me. "He lives far out, probably 15 minutes past the Quarry, in a massive barn." I shook my head. "That man never rests, but I've never seen someone be so sure of _everything_." I looked at Steve who looked lost in thought. "It's been a real eye opener. You know? After years of people telling me that I _shouldn't_ do something, or that I _can't_ do something or that I'm _wrong_. Then to have Murray come in and listen to me and give me... validation to everything that I'm saying? That he doesn't make me chose, or he doesn't pressure me, he just lets me be in the moment. Encourages it even. He wants to hear every crazy thought I have and that's liberating."

"Did I ever pressure you? Or tell you what to do?" Steve asked with concern.

"Well, you didn't support my idea about Barb." He was about to start talking. "I know you were worried about the danger we'd be in, but it worked out in the end didn't it?"

"Yeah I guess." He nodded. "So if I had supported your idea..." He looked away. "Would we still be together?"

Dread fell over me at the question because I knew the answer was yes. If it had been him that went along with my crazy plan to phone the Holland's and go to the park to get caught by Hawkins' Lab spies, of course we'd still be together. We'd still be together and everything that happened with Johnathan would've never happened. I would probably be here in Hawkins with Steve, in a small trailer, six months pregnant doing nothing but house work. The Hawkins curse.

So I told him the truth with a lie. "No." I sighed. "That's where the pressure comes in." I admitted. "When I was with you I was nervous I'd end up like my parents. You remind me of my father."

"Nancy you wound me." He held a hand over his chest and I laughed with relief that he didn't take it to heart. "I remind you of Ted Wheeler?"

_You used to._ "Yeah." I laughed again to hide my regret.

"Well, I don't want Murray's fish sticks to melt any further." Steve said with a sigh. He held his arms out for a hug and again my heart hurt for him. I still cared for him, I couldn't help it, he'd been a good friend despite how our relationship had ended and still looked after the kids when he could when I was gone. One of a kind. 

I hugged him as hard as I could. "Jeeze Nance, I'm only gonna be gone a year. And from what I read I won't even be put on the front lines." I squeezed him even harder in retaliation.

"Don't be stupid." I muttered. "And be careful." We both pulled back and I sighed. "If you ever wanna come back, Murray and I could use a roommate." It was a joke. 

"Yeah, watch out, you make living with Murray sound like a dream."

And apparently I sold that dream a little too well because 17 days later there was a knock on the door to the barn. Murray who was asleep and had his feet on the desk suddenly rolled to the ground to crawl to the security camera computer. When I had come from the kitchen to answer the door Murray pushed me to the ground, in a hushed whisper he yelled at me. "_Are_ _you_ _stupid_?"

And when he finally checked the cameras he rolled his eyes and thumped me on the head. "You kids don't quit." He got up and went back to his desk and in confusion I looked at the monitor to see Steve's car and a guy standing in front of the door. Murray flippantly waved his hand telling me to get it over with and I opened the door to see Steve. It was Steve accept without his infamous hair.

"Steve?" I went out to talk to him away from Murray. "What are you doing here?" Steve shrunk back from me.

"I couldn't do it Nance." Upon further inspection his eyes were watering. "I couldn't be there, they're sheep Nancy, all of them." He pulled me in for a hug, and still in shock I patted his back and looked around the field.

"Does anyone know you're here?"

"No." He sniffled.

"Well we need to hide your car... and I gotta talk to Murray." I already felt ten times more stressed and at the same time relieved he didn't go through with it all.

"I'm sorry if I'm putting you in a tough spot Nace, I just- I can't go back. And I can't go back home, you know how my dad is-"

"You're fine, just go park your car in the back, there's a white shed that has a cover you could put your car under. Bring your stuff too." He nodded pulling out from the hug and walking back to his car wiping his eyes.

I went back into the barn with a sigh and Murray popped a bottle of champaign. "Oh, the prince has returned." Rather than getting a glass like a normal person he just took a swig from the bottle.

"Murray..."

"Oh kitten, I know what you're going to ask, _"C-Can Steve stay, he won't tell anyone and __he's__ cute." _Well I say no." He went back to his computers and I rolled my eyes.

"Write that damn book yourself then." I crossed my arms and Murray paused. "I would only ask because that would be the polite thing to do, but Murray, I'm getting real damn tired of being _nice_ Nancy. So I'm not asking, I'm telling. Steve is staying as long as I am. He can pull his own weight in whatever he does and plus he's extra muscle because between the two of us it's just two brains and no brawn."

"So kitten's got claws? Okay Nancy, invite your boy. But don't say I didn't warn you."

"Worn me of what?" I scoffed.

"You're gonna fall for him, as if it were the very first time." He grinned just as Steve came through the door again.

"Hey, bald Murray!"

"Harrington, I have more hair than you now." He frowned. "Sit down, Nancy take the boy's things he must be tired. Champagne?"

"Uh, okay?"

"So Steven, I can call you that right?" He literally didn't even give Steve time to answer. "Where exactly are you coming from?"

"The army."

The glass that Steve was holding that Murray was pouring champagne into began overflowing and with an exasperated sigh he set the bottle back down on his desk. "I should've known this wasn't going to be a case of skipping out on the bride."

After putting Steve's bags in the upstairs loft I looked over the ledge in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Well to put it simply, what Steve did is highly illegal."

"What!?" I went down the stairs quickly and again Murray flippantly waved his hand.

"He signed contracts, he was in active duty and abandoned his charge. It's called going AWOL and he could go to prison."

"How does he get out of this?" I asked while Steve downed the champagne he was poured.

"You keep writing that book. Nobody will ever find us out here, and you," he pointed to Steve. "Do not, under any circumstances contact your family. They are to believe you've gone missing."

"Book? Nancy I didn't know you were writing a book that's awsome."

"Ah yes, she's been my little worm crafting and writing the perfect exposè on Hawkins and the government." He praised but Steve's smiled dropped.

"That's dangerous."

"You just said it was awsome."

"That was before I knew what it was about."

"Oh my god, I'm beginning to prefer the other boy. He was less confrontational, a bit of a pansy." Murray groaned.

"Look, Steve, this is what I'm doing you can be with me or against me on this either way it's happening."

"I won't chose to go against you." He sighed. "Not again."

"And with that I must say bravo Harrington."

"Murray, can it." I groused. "Steve you can stay upstairs in the loft, Murray pretty much just sleeps down here and my rooms in the back. Bathrooms by the kitchen and we don't have much else. We can only go out between 8pm and 5am and do not open any of the windows."

"Alright, so we're actually fugitives out here now. Defying the government, living in a barn." He chuckled.

"You're the only fugitive here, I'm just a journalist and he's just a crazy old guy." I laughed too, it felt good. Looking at Steve sitting there, his shaved head, black shirt and army pants and boots felt out of body. But at the same time I felt more myself than I felt the past two and a half years down in Philly.

Coming back up to the house, a bat full of nails dragging behind me, before I could even knock on the front door Steve already opened it. He looked back to see if Murray was watching and he stepped out.

"You enjoy your walk?" He asked quietly and I raised my brow.

"Yeah?" I held the bat forward and he grabbed the handle from my hand, we both froze when our fingers brushed. It's been like this a lot lately. Any little bit of contact has been making me jump out of my skin.

It's probably the guilt.

"You never did tell me about you and Johnathan." He said quietly. "Just one day I realized you guys looked at each other a little longer than usual and I knew you were a gonner."

"Steve I-"

"You can tell me Nance, we're friends right? We've gone and saved the damn world three times by now, we used to date, you've seen me naked." He gestured down to his body and I rolled my eyes. "I just wanna know how it happened. I'm curious." He leaned the bat against the barn and crossed his arms while I started picking at my fingers.

"I didn't know it was going to happen." I shrugged. "We had been up all night, writing and drinking with Murray. I don't know who came to who first but it just happened."

"When was that?"

"When I wrote the piece about Barb." I said quietly.

He nodded his head looking away from me. "I had a feeling it was then."

"I'm sorry." I didn't know what else to say.

"Don't be, it's in the past." He offered a small smile that didn't reach his eyes. "If there's anything I learned these past couple years, it's that life is to damn short to not love whoever you wanna love." He sighed. "Keep this between you and I, but Robin has really helped me a lot.'

"I'm glad you found her."

"That's what everyone always says but they don't get it." He laughed.

"What do you mean?"

"Robin likes women." He said matter of factly. "She's dated a lot of them actually, women coming in and out of the house, not a single one there for me."

I held my hand over my mouth to laugh. "Gosh, Steve. That's kinda sad."

"I'm not sad about it." He shrugged. "At least I'm not wasting my time on the wrong person." I felt like he said it for me. I took it a little too much to heart and it hurt. "I don't know, next person I'm with I want it to be for the long run." He shook his head with a laugh. "Never seen that coming for myself honestly, but you know what they say, there's someone out there for everyone." He smiled and I couldn't help the tears that escaped my eyes.

"Woah, woah, woah. Nancy?" I furiously started wiping at my eyes as he reached forward to console me. "I know I'm pathetic but you don't have to cry for me." He joked.

I couldn't handle it anymore. "Johnathan and I broke up." I hiccuped. His eyebrows went up in surprise. "I was too embarrassed to say anything because it sucks Steve." I looked away from him. "Here I am, back in this goddamn town, chasing the same damn dream."

"At least you have a dream." He said quietly. "You're gonna be alright, you know that right?"

"I think that's the worst part about it." 

"What?"

"The waiting, waiting for the right time, waiting for the right person, waiting for things to get better." He reached to wipe a tear I had missed. "I wanted that to be it. I wanted him to be it."

"Give it sometime, once you finish this book we're gonna make our next move. Yeah? You can figure out what the next step will be and I'll support you with whatever it is and help you in any way I can. Whether it's getting Byers back or slashing his damn tires we're gonna do it, okay?"

"You're too damn nice, Steve Harrington."

"And I can't stand seeing you cry, Nancy Wheeler."

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is my first time trying out AO3 (I've been a wattpadder for a bit but things got dry over there and I've never even read fics on the site bc it's all bland and boring oof) I'm gonna see how everything goes I guess!


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